I'm done waiting
All I seem to do is wait

Wait for the sun to rise;to set
Wait for the stars to shine
Wait for my grades to improve
Wait for my depression to release its grip on me

I'm stuck in life's waiting room

I will no longer wait for the sun to rise; to set
I will no longer wait for the stars to shine
I will no longer wait for my grades to improve
I will no longer wait for my depression to release its grip on me

And I will certainly not wait for the time to be right
as it seems to never be.

Instead I will make time right

And I will force my self to understand;
that in order to find my self I must fall
and hopefully if I have done something right
and have stopped waiting for something that no longer exists

You will catch me.

Driving around
Laughing
Smiling
Talking about the future
Eating
Breathing

It was perfect
the glimmer of your eyes
the way you asked if I was okay when I fell silent
the way we had a 20 minute discussion on christmas lights


It was all perfect

Driving around
Laughing
Smiling
Talking about the future
Eating
Breathing

It was perfect
the glimmer of your eyes
the way you asked if I was okay when I fell silent
the way we had a 20 minute discussion on christmas lights


It was all perfect

You'll be gone,

2 hours,
your shadow will have subsided

2 minutes,
your imprint will have faded from my bed

10 seconds,
your coffee will be cold

5 seconds,
the dog will stop barking for you

2 months,
till you will be back

Forever,
until I stop missing you
    
  ER.

My love is greater
it  is grand

My love out shines the stars;
they are terribly jealous, stars never seem to be kind

My love is deeper,
than all the oceans and seas combined

Your love,
is empty.

Your love,
is dim.

Your love does not,
out shine the stars.
Nor does it even compare to the depth of the oceans and seas.

It does not exist.

yet I want it so badly.

  ER.

I feel you next to me
you are not here
Your head is placed upon my chest
my chest is empty
My hands are running through your hair
my arms hang beside me
We go back and forth; verbally dancing
An empty expression sits upon my dull face

My phone rings
**it's not you.

It scares the **** out of me
Knowing that one day you'll be a teenager
Talking back to mom,
blasting music in your room,
Lying about grades,
stressing over college.


But promise me,
promise me you'll try to be nice to mommy.
At least nicer than I was.
She really means the best.


Promise,
that you'll be a good student,
don't leave things to the last minute.
Trust me I learned it the hard way.

Please baby,
be a good person.