i'm so scared and sad and sick
and i just want you


that's all

My body feels too old,
I have this rare cold,
Thinking about you and soon I'll die,
Why did you go without a goodbye?

I could feel my last day on earth,
This would be my final breath,
There's nothing for me to live,
I could feel Judas sinful deed.

I have a gun over my head,
Three hours from now, I'll be dead.
Knives and bottle pills are under my pillow,
If you're here, you'll see I'm very, very low.

My baby, why have you left me all alone?
Now I don't know exactly what I'd do,
I just want you to know that you're the only one,
Who is worth dying for and that's really true.

But before I commit a suicide,
I just want you to know that my spirit,
Will surely be watching over you
Because even in hell, I'll protect you.

I never regret the day I have met you,
The day I said "I love you, I miss you"
Please, my dear, pray for me now,
Because you'll never see me tomorrow.

I love you and I wish you could hear,
I honestly love you and I hope you're here,
I love you but I must go,
I love you for simply being you.

Once again here I am,
with my heart so far away,
you don't ever get use to just making it through the day,
It couldn't be worse dying in any other way,
god the price I'd pay,
to make you stay,
you always were so wild,
compared to me,
I hope I can keep you tame.

I find it so strange,
how you just enjoy leaving now,
It's a terrofying change,
you can now just run,
run out on the open range,
leave me to die,
of my depressing selfishness,
I'm such a lingering pain,
Leave me to die of my Loving mange.

It's like
we can't even pretend
to be normal anymore.
Can't  have anything in mind
without thinking of our next score.
Forgotten how to interact without them,
Lost all social mores.
Do we think ourselves better,
More deserving or special?

Feeling the aftershock, again;
What keeps us going?

There's this woman
She has these large loopy curls
in her long chestnut hair
Big, brown eyes
The most perfect smile
She makes me laugh
I like her
And I've noticed that it seems to snow or rain
almost every time I see her
I'm not supposed to be talking to her
according to some kind of code about ex-lovers
that I've been told exists
between men who've drank together
But every now and then I go to her house at night
and we **** as hard and as wet
as the concrete I travel across to get there
I put my soft lips on hers
and my calloused palms on her *******
and my fingers in the dark between her legs
Midnight flower
She puts her pretty lips on my neck
and trails off to other regions.
I let her
smiling
laughing in my mind
I'd say I'm sorry you blew it pal
but I don't wanna lie

Lust is a sin everyone will enjoy,
from the bums in the courtyard,
mingling and thrusting ***** privates,
to the chaste; to you and me, and celibate,
The celibate lust for self-recognition,
for their gods,
for a higher purpose,
To strive is to lust and to lust,
it is only human to lust for comfort,
for control,
for order.
Goals of every sect are prized,
Sought after are the lusts
that guide us,
that energize the batteries in our backs,
tells us to do crazy things,
some promote devastation.