Diane K Pak

Diane K Pak Mar 2022

I gotta let you go now.... (It'll be okay, I'd promise)...

I had to slow down to feel my heart sitting there truly accepting the moments that someone else will be truly loving you still.

Time travels with our heart and mind, but except for mine.

I must,
I need,
I want,

To see you happier because in the end, it'll be okay because when you've forgot about my name and maybe will someday you'll forget that we were once even friends.

I am hopeless,
I am useless,
I am mediocrity,

Because losing you was like blasting off the last kryptonite in outer space of this odyssey.

Having to have fallen for you it was like my own ecstasy trying to raised no expectancy. A price to pay even if it was just minute or two of sitting next to you.

That kryptonite that pushes me away, so you'll have the heart to choose even if I wanted here for me to stay.

#OnlyYou #S

Diane K Pak Dec 2021

These Words.

Touching tracing a wounded scar that's not very far fallen from the tree.

I keep on saying why do I have to keep on believing if this time if it still wasn't me.

My emptiness is still beyond beneath this surface like it's killing me slowly.

Taking up the space between me and my face.

Depending on if it was a will that was pushing me further away from His grace.

I constantly ask God why when if this was only my questions like It always has been.

He shows me consistently without him after all there will be no hymns to think about Him.

Even if I had to beg, to ask, to show.

Will this be enough for him to know?

to agree to sign up for this as it was a hidden contract with it without a hidden miss.

a missing ingredient as it was to be of a part his kindness.

Thinking I was such a big mess.

Nevertheless, it was a part of his plans that was fulfilled only to be kept in a treasure chest.

These words are engraved in heaven above as I follow in his footsteps on how to reset and rest.

Here's to hoping the history that has been repeated can forever take a deep breath.

As to no grave is better than His divine grace seeing it beyond measure upon the face of the earth and can't forget.

My heart is upon me in these stories now laying beyond sunsets.

Seeing angels be called down to sharpen and shape the foundations as now far beyond the east.

Can we all now agree that these words weren't just for me?

Diane K Pak Nov 2021

Alone this Christmas....

My Christmas stocking left me with overly shocking.
That each year was without Christmas joys and oh yet, oh boy...
It was an art and out and of doubt.
I was ever again each year alone on Christmas already with a frown and wishing it all over by then. Because I can't say Merry Christmas all year around hoping I"ll stay when it's over then.

Some families have Christmas ornaments on a tree. When it'll ever be enough when you'll see me for me.

Some families have traditions while I'll be grateful that I will be wishing them after all while it feels like they're all having a ball.

Some families have dinner at the dinner table but wish someone lighted a candle for me as I'll have dinner but only for me.

Since Christmas has changed and how alone I had felt. Christ was.
the only my one in a lifetime gift
I started to see those things wishes granted and not take it as it is.

As a Christmas tree as pretty as a bee. Soon a tradition or two was like no other as it was so good to be true and it was still.

As I am now reflecting and smiling at the family table I wouldn't trade it for the world and hope some stay here to say it truth be told.

Before I mattered not the most because there was no time making them a desire from my heart.

Wishing Christmas wasn't alone for her was the best present seen yet to come was for enjoying His presence was a dream lit up like never before.

...And she'd replied with a love that lasted forevermore...

Singing under her mistletoe was the first thing that took away since the very first snow that never be missed.

Diane K Pak Nov 2021

I could write a song poem for ya....

Seeing you looking at the sun.

Because radiantly I was looking at the moon.

Looking for you.

Staying here with you it feels like we're shooting stars.

Hoping my sunrises will stay seated for my sunsets in this hidden dark.

Only if I am here with you looking at the skies while sleeping beside you at the nearby oceans looking for my shooting star.

Looking down to see you frown only I could wish it away.

Only if this moment was here to stay and even if we could slay, we would be awake for days.

Diane K Pak Nov 2021

Something 'bout Romance

Tell me something that not everyone knows about you?

You telling me makes not pretending how not to stop feeling for beauty, even if it's true.

Miss feelin' for ya.
Like I wanna dream it all over again even if I kinda wanted too.

I won't even if I care to tried.

But, I will like I'm not trying to hide anymore...

Because hiding behind the lights it won't do me any right...

Diane K Pak Nov 2021

Unlearn, Relearn, Reality

Someone was told me that the sounds of our friendship was the adventures of a lifetime.

It wasn’t until I unlearn the possibilities of wrestling with today’s truth and lies.

Becoming a wreck in the ship was like becoming ooh hey and now it’s time to walked away without saying our goodbyes in time and let it dies down and fly.

My heart had to relearn of our hidden secrets which relies on an unseen, understanding, and uncompromising situationships.

The real reality wasn’t accelerating the acceptance of what it could’ve been if we were to ace of what we’re to ready to face it.

It was actually facing of what are the ways of what we’re dealing of our ourselves in tiny pieces.

#e

Diane K Pak Sep 2021

You are the Revelations

Seeing you tonight in you're suit and tie.
Like I am dying to meet you closer by.

Seeing your visionary smile makes me think for a while.
Hoping to see your soul as it warmths me like a wildfire trying to hide it best that it extends longer than it ever could be for a second chance.

Wishing you're that someone who can see it too.
When I am trying all these butterflies only to be catching them from you.

You're my revelations waiting to happen like I ever felt more alive inside your hazel eyes. Burning by the fireplace tonight.

Without an hourglass to tell us how a place in your heart was worth the fight.

Perfect love as it is.
When all I ever wanted to dream was as real as it could be and as to what was being said for a slight chance of it could really be.

Loving you was my only chance to love you deeper as it is waking up to say goodbyes to these trying times and your eyes and your suit and tie.

Tell me so and I'll change it all.
The dream I ever felt, felt like an inkling that left my skin without a hidden spot.

I guess it was all ever a shot in the dark.
Like it waiting to be someone place and be marked.

Revelations are my last reason to see you in this season.
If only if we're breathing to see the face of only me dreaming.

#S