You said the anger would come back
just as the love did.

I have a black look I do not
like. It is a mask I try on.
I migrate toward it and its frog
sits on my lips and defecates.
It is old. It is also a pauper.
I have tried to keep it on a diet.
I give it no unction.

There is a good look that I wear
like a blood clot. I have
sewn it over my left breast.
I have made a vocation of it.
Lust has taken plant in it
and I have placed you and your
child at its milk tip.

Oh the blackness is murderous
and the milk tip is brimming
and each machine is working
and I will kiss you when
I cut up one dozen new men
and you will die somewhat,
again and again.

Confusion
Heart Tearing
No Answer

Eyes Glaring
Heart Sinking
Mind Racing

Sheltered, Loved
Routine, Mundane
False Smile
False Tears
Desperate, Aching
Distraction

Always

Sun, Stars
Wholesome
Crisp Breathing

Never to meet
Guilt to have

Not one, but Many
Breath, Beat, Smile

Destiny

Incapable to Succeed

Determined to Breath

Emails from airlines tease me, then torture me.
"Make your daydreams a reality"
"Flights on sale!"
Don't taunt me.
I look away from email to the wall;
Smiles greet me. Memories follow.
I remember that smile. It was a smile from when I was with you.
My smiles don't look like that now.
I pull out your shirt - it doesn't smell like you anymore.
I hold it close for a moment anyway.
I curl up sitting on the floor, incapacitated, halted.
Pulled beneath the waves.
It passes. It always does. It has to.
Here I have a life that I have built that you have never been able to touch,
It goes on without you here.
And there's nothing I can do about that.
So I'll continue on, living off dreams and memories.
And the emails will still come.

The sky was overcast,
A gloomy sort of feel to the air,
A gray haze cast over the corn stalks.
The breeze was brisk,
And brought goose bumps to my skin.
I wrapped my arms tighter around myself,
Reminding me of how you used to hold me.
I took a deep breath and watched my exhale
Disappear into the wind, my imaginary
Cigarette smoke leaving my system.
Only about an arm’s length away,
I thought I saw something fall.
Looking up into the sky,
I saw nothing, but
When I put my hand out,
Palm up,
A small white flake landed on my mitten.
Autumn had passed, winter was here.

The sun fell open down the sky,
and tumbled from her womb a moon.
Behind the moon a curtain fell,
an inky swell with light stuck through.

So from the sky a light fell down
to beam upon an upturned face.
A face that for a moment shone -
it flickered then it died away.

And for a time it felt engulfing.
A moment tangled round me.
The light was bent about my shape,
it quietly embraced me.

While still, surrounded by its grasp,
the ground that held me shrank away.
I rose and to the surface broke,
and pregnant, found myself unmade.

I looked upon our coiling earth,
a shrinking trace of blue and green.
And on the earth i saw my face,
it shone, it blazed with light.

Then falling down towards myself
I stumble and am born again.
I close my eyes, for one last time
As on I walk into the night.

Her bittersweet revenge
Lingering in your mind.
Those haunting ghostly words
From a girl locked away
from this evil eyed world.

Her haunting ghostly complexion
The cause of all your nightmares.
The blooded knife that fell
And missed you by an inch.
You are too afraid to cry.

The ****** in the alley
Your name written in blood.
You know that she is coming,
You're the next one on her list.
She tells you that you best get running.

To her it's all a game
The first one dead wins it all.
But you don't know her secret...
She is a figment of your imagination.
She is that girl you bullied to death.

Her bittersweet revenge
Lingering on your mind.
You made a promise
and never again
Will you make anyone suffer.

So just before you speak a word,
Make sure you know the truth.
This could be your next sin.
You could be her next victim...
The girl you bullied to death.

You and I have been us so long
That's all I know how to do
But since you said goodbye, I'm gone
I'm having to learn something new

I'm too old to go back to school
If you must know the truth
This is the hardest thing I've ever done
Learning how to un-love you

Falling head over heals was the easy part
It's all I ever wanted to do
Love with you was a work of art
With the lines drawn out so smooth

Not sure I would have started this
In hindsight if I knew
How hard it'd be to study this
Learning how to un-love you