When your alone
the page stairs at you
the fear creeps back
reminding you,
your alone
no one knows,
the pain inside
just wanting to
meet one who
understands what
its like to be tagged,
and to be the only one
with the tag,
some genetic mutation
not inherited
in a sea of people
you
the mutation
almost like your
a science project
gone bad.
The stares
the words
mutation
science
project
fear
all blending into
one word
not remembering
all that is said
forgetting the
important words
conversations
slipping
not remembering
lost.

Unwanted
Trash
Unworthy
Ugly
Misfit
Weird
Friendless
Unneeded
Rejected
Useless
Freak
******
Disfigured
**M­e

Why must every high, inevitably fall to a low
every time I feel like I finally made it out
I find myself back under the covers screaming
wanting out. Scratching at the air trying to find
the way out. getting a hold of nothing sinking
deeper and deeper into the covers until no one
can find me.  once I hit bottom i reach around
blindly looking for the way to climb back up
slowly finding my footing remembering what
it's feels like to smile and actually feel your lips
turning up, feeling the smiles of everyone around me
but as soon as I think I'm out, something always
shoves me back down, until someone will be
brave enough to catch me before I fall.

Why do the tears still come?
Yet i hide behind laughs.
Thinking he likes the outside.
He doesn’t know about the fight
The fight that tears me apart.
The fight I still don’t know how to win.
The fight that seems to never end.
So I will shed my last tear,
close my eyes,
and be the girl I am supposed to be.