A silent solitary surrender
Is all that it would be
Just one small transgression
No one need ever see

A battle fought in every second
To what rhythm does my heart beat

My conscious softly whispers
Advice I’d rather disregard
It knows the wisest choices
Are oft times doubly hard

Who can face down temptation
When surrender tastes so sweet

A thousand small surrenders
Lead to the darkest night
When each surrender leads
One step further from the light

Reflective light from broken glass.
Reflects the moments as they pass.

Train of thought from a broken plan.
Remembers the pain of a broken man.

Continued exposure to a grand illusion.
Has led my heart to a false conclusion.

Passionless words end a passionate fight.
Silence the symphony of a passionless night.

In the Middle
That’s where I find myself
Half way there and half way gone
Not much further from where I started
At least that’s what I tell myself
Not much further to go
At least that’s how it seems
But so very far from my dreams
The middle
Just the word middle
Tastes dry and bland upon my tongue
In the middle of life
The middle of indecision
If I stopped mid-sentence
Would you understand my meaning
Can I understand life’s meaning
In the middle

I am not these crooked glasses,
that slightly hide my eyes.
I am not this bushy brow,
that furrows when I sigh.

I am not this auburn hair,
that will some day fade to gray.
I am not this mortal shell,
that was born to pass away.

I am not this sordid past,
that sometimes brings me tears.
I am not these hopes and dreams.
I am not these fears.

I am not the worldly wealth,
that gives direction to the day.
I am not the pastimes,
that help time pass away.

I am not this car.
I am not this home.
I am not this lack of friends.
I am not alone.

I am not a number.
I am not this name.
As time is surely passing,
I am surely not the same.

I was never yesterday.
I’ll never be tomorrow.
Today I cannot hold the past,
from the future I can’t borrow.

I am at my deepest core,
a never ending will.
I am what this mind would think,
if all its thoughts were still.

I am love unconditional.
Potential unconfined.
I am what my god intended,
when this soul was first designed.

It is only a reflection.
This man you think you see.
He appears bound by his existence,
but I, have always been free.

To what end
I’m so sick of wanting
I wish that I could close out the light
Block out the noise
Ignore the world

To what end
I complete another circle
I run the race at breakneck speed
Woe to those who
Refuse to run

To what end
I long to find reason
Not just a reason but reason itself
Six billion people make believe
Everything is real

To what end
Is the universal question
To what end
God laughs at the suggestion

Minutes pass into hours
Hours into days
Though my life pass into twilight
I will still dream of the people and places
Of my youth

I dream of endless summers by the river
The smell of fresh water in my hair
Laughing voices in the distance

A giant stone church
It’s steeple standing tall
Sentinel of our sleepy borough

Fresh cut grass
Dirt stains on my clothes
A pleasant ache in all my muscles
After a day of playing ball

A warning siren blows
We all rush off to meet it
Perilous adventure of my youth
Dousing wayward flame

Star filled summer nights
Chasing tiny hand held lights
Mad dashes through the town

The smell of funnel cakes
Brings smiles for miles around
At the annual street fair

Minutes pass into hours
Hours into days
As my life passes into twilight
I long for the freedom and the faces
Of my youth

Reality is a teasing uncle
Who sometimes gets my nose
I stomp like a child yelling, “give it back”
And he laughs at my naiveté

Innocence is a long lost friend
That I oft times remember fondly
If he could see what his absence wrought
He’d scoff at my depravity

Time my dishonest father
Promised me he’d always be fair
If you ask me he passes too quickly
In the moments that matter the most

Sleep my fickle mistress
Who more often than not eludes me
Not in my bed when I set out to find her
She’s ran off with my dreams to the coast

Life my mysterious woman
I can’t help myself but to chase her
Just when I think I finally found her favor
I find she has more surprises