mumbled words induce a trance
a sullen glance at annoyance
then decide on smoky existence

Something is missing

Tomorrow I present a story to class
about a man who cremates himself
they will
ask if he is a reflection of myself
I'll have to nod my head slowly
taking in my fill
of "why's he so grim" and
"his mind is so ugly"
but I describe death
better than anything
I'm sorry for the horror story
that is
me

chairs don't get enough credit
nor do beds, who witness
ever accumulating sleep debt
we've let flying with the clouds
go from fantasy to unnoticed
head bent constantly because of phones
speaking in hushed tones to
the person on the other line
while we decline away from the public
a distructive inability to communicate
face to face
or hold conversations
completely connected, yet disconnected
is what this world has become

got back to my apartment
got ****** up as hell
to remind myself
of all the things that are me
stars and mountains,
an idividual gravity
sang sad songs
filled with Eddie, breathing
and seasalt
to bring forth my occult
the little witchcraft in my skin
I washed it down with a cigarette
to remind myself
*don't give in

Grandpa left me his keyboard
I left it in the corner for years
when late this very night
my spine grew chill with fright
for the keys clacked
of their own accord
as if wanting to be heard
then my spine did thaw and a smile bloom
for this phantom wasn't bringing doom
It was just a reminder from 'ol Grandpa
to let music fill the room

Seething in me
troubles aggravate
so irate
******* A
now I want nothing more
than to be no where at all
ditch this town
give the finger to Long Beach
be a ******* ***
under an over pass
the last stop on a bus
going abso-*******-lootly
no where