How stupid was I to think
I mattered as much to them
as they do to me

How stupid am I to expect myself as equal,
as one of them
when all time has done
was slowly tear us apart

How very, very stupid am I
to think
I still matter.

You push me away like
you want to be loved,

You hurt me with words
like you want to be healed.

You tell me
you hate me
But do I really believe it?

Honey wake up and be real,
we’ve both lost our spirit.

I'm beginning to think that hope is bad
It's bad because
You think that the more you inhale it
The more distracted you will be by reality
You think that once you contain a feeling of hope
that it will make you stronger
And help you look forward to something
Something that will never happen.
Although the more you believe that hope can fix everything,
the more it bites you back
You will get  hallucinations,
with the impression that
at least some part of your life will be good
And when you realize the truth
of reality,
chunks of you gets taken away
and you start to see the bruises and
lack of energy
that has eaten you alive.
Because hope,
hope will make you high with
the thought of dreams and passion
Hope will make your eyes see things
that arent even there
Hope is a drug, and hallucinations are the aftermath of a made-up world
you created.
So never,
Never get addicted to that senseless,
useless drug
before its too late
and it bites you away
slowly
until you vanish.