“Death Talk”

A. Language: The use of euphemism or metaphors to communicate a subtler or deeper meaning than those associated with a planner speech. Example, It Was Curtains- Which in one’s mind could mean, after they log the minute and tag your right toe; then then cover your peaceful corpse with clean white linen concealing your body from all the others until only the powerful certain selected one’s can watch your private encore show.

B. Music: Themes of loss and death are heard in all the musical styles. It has been suggested that death imagery rock music helped break the taboo against public mention of death. Music artists also use their talents to send out a message that somehow we all can one way or another understand and relate to.

C. In literature: The meaning of death is often explored as it relates to society as well as the individual in the form of a poem or novel. Jahan Ramazani says, “The poetry of mourning for the dead assumes in the modern period an extraordinary diversity and range, incorporating more anger and skepticism, more conflict and anxiety than ever before”. It is also how I have a safety valve after everything that I take part in. Yes some of my written works are insane but I also have a deep feeling of respect and honor along with dignity when preparing a passed loved one onto there next journey.

2. “Theoretical Perspectives”

A. Structural Functionalism- Society controls individuals through physical and material restraints, but its true power derives from moral authority. Moral authority is experienced as an external force, which takes on a sacred quality because it is experienced as unlike ordinary forces and objects. Religion arises out of ritual. It is in religious rituals that society’s moral power is most clearly felt and where moral and social sentiments’ are strengthened and renewed. All death rituals, irrespective of their substance, operate to sustain common sentiments.

B. Symbolic Interaction- is how people learn in a society to continue to and carry their specific customs and beliefs, through interactions with other members within their society by learning the practice they were taught, grew accustomed and to witness growing up.

C. Social Learning- When it comes to the topic of death along with the feelings of grief and loss, there is no singular way that an individual copes with the emotions that persist. Death is a very difficult topic to deal with, and at best we can really only hope to learn all about it. Understanding it is an undertaking all by itself, and becoming an expert on such a topic is not something that many people can say is an easy topic to talk all about. One learns social learning through demonstrations, verbal instructions and through symbolic witnessing by means of movies, television, internet, literature, and radio through music.

3. “Subcultural differences in Death Customs”

When thinking of some different subcultural differences in death customs the Asian’s African. Hawaiian an Native Indian population come to mind because although in each geographical area they all may look the same, they are actually differ in their customs because there unique tradition. Say where one group may only bury as to where the next group close only by cremation and etc… One could also think that it could be both sides of the coin when you think as to the point of it being either a comforting experience or an anxiety producing event. In my opinion it all depends all upon the individual.

4. “Myself vs. Students (quoted on taking Death and Dying Class)

After reading the students comments from taking the course on Death and Dying, I would have to agree with the consensus that I believe that a greater majority of students would have a total different way of thinking and would seek a greater outlook on their own lives along with having a better appreciation of live in general upon completing such a course.

I also think that taking a course on Death and Dying as possibly a requirement for a consideration on an early discharge from the Correctional System could lead to positive results and crime rates would then drop. Statics prove that within the prison population there are a vast number of inmates who suffer from depression of a loss of some kind that spans all crimes that are committed and is a contributing factor to their actions.

As for me, the new values that could be obtained after taking such a course were already instilled within me for many years and until recently those values have then manifested themselves and then slowly then came into true contrast.

Within the endeavors I am now slowly undertaking pursuing a degree in Mortuary Science and in the process after witnessing all that is truly entailed, I often ponder and think to myself, what is it that I can do different so I don’t meet my time anytime soon, and how can I also have many more memorable moments with my children? Because, all the gifts I have already have received now makes me wonder how many more rewards now wait around the next corner. I feel that the life I now feel I must live one should be able to be able to enjoy a comfortable one that I now dream of and if pursued diligently with a positive outlook one can harness such a life and I truly feel it is now finally, at my fingertips

Thank You for your time reading. I put a lot into this assignment.

(SirCARSr. 4-3-14)

Upon reading the article I found myself thinking that it was a topic tainting the beautiful art in the process of death. Death is something we all were born to one day or another eventually have to face whether we want to or not. Masking the process with mind altering drugs could possibly rob an individual of having a noble peaceful passing along with possible negative reactions from the surviving family members.

A question that came to mind after reading the assignment was, what was the family’s position in the decision to undertake such a treatment? Because death has a major impact on everyone left in the wake of losing a loved one.

In my current position I have to remain and always be neutral in my thoughts and if I find myself leaning one way or another I have to rebalance myself and never waiver to one side or another. In the Funeral Parlor business there are many religions that come seeking service and again I must encompass all denominations even if it is something I don’t believe in. I was never one to talk about political issues and definitely when the subjects about drugs ever come up I cannot afford to get involved with it.

In my pursuit of a higher education and working on obtaining a degree in the field of Mortuary Science I am beginning to see that my actions and reactions are now being redefined. I am also working on poise and proper composure along with training myself to think before speaking. In the field of Mortuary Science there is no room for mistakes for you only get one chance in every aspect in the business to make a lifelong memory of the situation that family’s face coming in for a service and a positive memory is what they expect.

Being a witness of the result of death on nearly a weekly and sometimes more basis, I have been entrusted and been welcomed into a community that only a select certain extremely  few individuals ever get to be a part of. There are many attributes that Funeral Directors in the field seriously look for in someone. It is imperative to always refrain from loose talk within the Funeral Home and especially in the Preparation Room and not to mention even in the public.

In last stage situations I have seen both sides of the coin and have to only accept not encourage one way or another if one chooses their avenue of departing. I’ve seen them pass away on heavy morphine and other drugs and also others stop all pain meds to go naturally and then the ones who also had no choice in the matter.

In closing, I found this assignment and subject matter extremely valuable to me because it gave me a perfect opportunity to express my true thoughts and beliefs along with practicing proper education in the field of Mortuary Science.

Death and Dying Class Assignment I received an 80 for a grade do to the avoidance of talking about the drug aspect. I feel that everyone in the class should have received a 100 because it was a reaction paper to what we all had to read.

(Sir Curt A. Rivard Sr. 1-24-14)

I thought about this paper for many weeks and just what it was I was going to write about. As hard as I can try, I can’t muster up any feelings in any shape or form. The only fear I now face is, when either my father or my girls mother who are both very close to be giving up the fight here on earth I ask myself will I even cry at their funeral and if I don’t what then will all the other family members then think of me? My only defense I guess, will be, I cried out all my tears when my brother had passed away and how he told me not to call for help as he knew he was dying on a ****** overdose. I still to this day deal with just that and how I wish I didn’t listen to what he had said.

All I remember was, when he got that 1.3M he told me he loved me, I was his dog Dollar and he was my Richie Rich and he’ll take care of me because I took care of him when everybody in the family turned him away until he got his money and that was when they all started to come out of the woodwork. Because I never took that into consideration he knew I was true to him and I had to honor a wish that he had given to me before we cashed the check. We both knew one of us probably would die as a result of it and his wish was to just let him be if things got real ugly.

I remember also how I cried all by myself in the funeral home and sat all alone in the church and that nobody in my family asked me if I was ok or even to tell me that they loved me rather then telling me I was next. I now know that they said all that only because he gave me money and tens of thousands they were.  He told me many times not to give any of the money he gave me because they didn’t take care of him for 5 years in a wheelchair like I had when he was **** *** poor and with nothing.

It is not out of hatred for not possibly being able to cry but rather I think I am now numb to such imagery. In the pursuit of the endeavor I am undertaking I am using the valuable skills I am gaining so maybe one day I will be able to possible give my children a life I feel everyone should enjoy. In the process of my newly gained knowledge in an undertaking that is shrouded in mystery to many, I am witnessing much more than the normal person could even fathom, handle, let alone I feel comprehend.

My funeral will be a private event for certain selected individuals that only my children deem fit to attend. As far as music and readings go, let them sing and speak their hearts out to me. My estate will be supervised and handled and given to my youngest son Joshua J. Rivard. I want to be wearing a custom tailored suit and without the backs cut out of them. I also wish to be placed in a full view casket till the time where I am then transported to a private location to begin the process of turning myself into a mummy.

Truly the sad part of this whole thing is, and the my hair on my forearms and on the back of my neck are tingling on their end's is, I had the true pleasure of embalming, casketing, and being a pole bearer for my elementary school teacher "Math Class with Mr.. D." (remember that poem?) and I had read his own obituary that he wanted printed for all to read in the local paper prior to his own death and here it is, my college class assignment. O' yeah, Yes I did place in his hands a scientific calculator a TI 81 it was that nobody got to see because nobody came to his awake but I filled in for the millions that should have been there for him. It also was a blessing to tell the funeral director to put him in a solid pecan wood coffin that was the most expensive and I got to keep the extra pillow and the vintage ribbon that was also inside. That is how my poem "Casket Pillow" also came to life.

(SirCARSr. 1-17-14)

Death and Dying Class assignment, Professor gave me a 90 for a grade.
Although this isn't a poem it is something I felt I owed to all my readers, Thank you all for reading and the time you spent thinking about what I had written.

Till Later, SirCARSr.....