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Courtlyn Quay Sep 19
Let me make this perfectly clear for everyone from my past.

You won, you got the better of me by just being yourself.

Now, lets move on.

It's kind of hard to when you leave a piece of you behind any time you feel the need to burn a bridge.

That there's something you forgot to take with you or you left there because maybe it was to much baggage.

We've been there, am'i'right?

I broke off pieces of me at a time and left them there for better or worse

And I've done that for every person I can think of.
Some larger, some smaller.
Don't feel lucky that it was minimal or you weren't given your fair share

I broke off pieces of myself until there was nothing left, and I didn't think of what those pieces meant

I couldn't because it was too "rough" to think about.

But like tomorrow always comes, I had to think about it at some point.

And I hated the hell out of myself too, with good reason.

Wasn't a felon, but I wasn't a great person.

I demonized and hated myself with good reason.

Didn't save my foster brother and I ***** about my past.

But then I realized something about me not being a good person but actually caring about how people felt and the fact I want to change.

Out of all the things I went through and every piece of shell shock or excitement I created.

You were all amazing people despite what you did.

I didn't idolize you. I just knew that I couldn't ever judge you for being you.

And I thought you were awesome for one reason or another.

Today, like many other days.

I left a piece of me behind

I had to move on,

But I want you to know

I will think about those pieces of myself I left behind

For your sake.

and mine
Courtlyn Quay Mar 20
My words have always been reserved for the people that mean the most to me.
Courtlyn Quay Mar 20
I've burnt my bridge,
I've delved my dives
I broke my word
I died so many times.

I hoped you'd see
I thought you'd think
I wrought my self
I scared myself.

There's no need
thesis fed
broken found
thoughtfulness made bound.

I'm scared to care for others
I'm aware of fair play
at least I thought about your heart
But we were better off from finish to start.
Courtlyn Quay Mar 13
You do realize, you haven't had the hardest life. Steve Bushime and Leonard Nemoy can out weigh family crisis. especially car crash's and morality aside.
You were endowed with more opportunity than most around.
After all,
we were taught to walk in your shadows.
yes
you were in that category.
Because we were considered the faulty programing of your adopted sister.
So our only opportunity was to adapt from the predecessors our grandparents Aspired us to
CH to DA
TR to JA
CO to carbon dioxide.
If you were worried about making an impact. trust me. you only fell like a shooting star.
the crater is nothing.
With your lessons
I want to do what D did.
But I wont, because of two reasons






if you_cared = true
{
we wouldnt be where we are
}
#troyrosenbaum
Courtlyn Quay Feb 28
Hunting without friends, is meager and meaningless.
Dire is the contract in my heart, fearless and seamless.
Internal is my engine infernal is my heart.
I'll tear away at the skin of this mask to reveal what hides behind it.
I'll tear up at the thought of us cheering at a year well done.
I am only human made thought.
brought not gods eyes but the lack of made in someone's thought.
Discussing idea's without friends is thoughtless.
Pyre is the thought that comes to mindfulness.
Hands curled up on shoulders too cold to consider.
The match box flickers only once more
I could bare a thousand screams, A thousand wounds, scars and burns.

I could **** a thousand men for a moment in the eyes of god.

What I wouldn't do just to carve a crevice out of the world

Just to show the mark of a mad man craving truth.

Put a knife straight to gods eye if it meant the blood I shed made one less person cry.

I've beg for forgiveness and broken every bond looking for an out.

I've come again trading my soul for a chance for others to hear my shout.

You'll be ok.
Doubt is a strong feeling. It grips us everyday. Sometimes we make deals with unnatural things. like platypuses.
I think, for a matter of fact.
I feel, I project, I confide, and of all things I hope.

With that in my mind, I reflect and coincide with these aspects so covalent.

But what about what I reject?
The matter of the individual is the gradual unequivocal repression and growth of that individual

It is required for the soul

Nothing is required.

Nothing is required beyond what existence requires.
"good" or "bad"

And just as people exist so too does existence.
We demand so much and request so much.

Existence can only provide what we provide for existence.

This is my semblance to actuality, not minimalism.

I reject what could be, for a future that's beyond me.
This is a take on one of the Taoist lessons I've read. I hope it reaches someone who can enjoy it.
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