collin

collin Jul 2021

foundation giving away
i am surrounded by dirt
falling helplessly grasping
reaching out for roots
and getting nothing in return
but worms and soot.
sometimes the ground we stand on
would rather swallow every foot

collin Jul 2021

bye

speak to me in a tone
blanket me in the concept
of not being alone
supposed to be in love
it feels like that except
the trust and comfort and other stuff
that makes love…well love

collin Jul 2021

fake it til you make it

i thought i would miss you more
finding peace in realizing my independence
left foot still trips on the steps but it’s wet
so i like to pretend it’s coincidence

collin Jun 2021

it’s not me, it’s me

my timing is always wrong
i belong
to a select percentage
of men who consented
to a whole life tormented
by you

collin Jun 2021

born ultimatum

i want to be in love again
the necessity of morning coffee beyond
head spinning drunk and madly grinning
devious shifting of hips and hops cementing
nights that never end until the
sunrise starts ringing

i want to be in love again
or just a little bit closer than only talking
when you want to or when it’s not too
inconvenient

collin Jun 2021

spandex

breathing even feels distant now
a smog of hissing remembrances of incidents
i wore a fools hat and pranced and danced
and pretended it was happen stance
a lack of loving anything for so long
became the reason i could not love at all

collin Jun 2021

i felt happy

feeling amazing
i graze upon
seeking saline
and saying
out loud
the things i’ve lost
redirecting the pain i felt
the insane i was dealt
matriarchal reign
my adolescent hell
i descend as i dwell
i wish the memories erased
and well, i am still presented
with a text and facetime call
each week, wishing me well