I pictured you so differently in mind
I'm disappointed with you turned out to be
Who you were all along.
I've spent my lifetime searching
Four years allotted just to you.

While you...
You talked over me
You ignored me
You didn't care about me
You made me feel worthless
And I was in love with you.

But I made excuses for you
I wrote your lines
Molded you into my Prince Charming.
I made you the lead
Of my autobiography.
But when the curtain closed
You were still the same boy
Who wasn't in love with me.

Then one day I fired you,
I cast someone else.
But you kept returning
In the flashbacks.

Stop grinning.
Stop grazing my arm.
Stop winking.
Stop
     c
            o
    n
f
       u
          s
  i
n
      g

me.

How can I move on
If you're still in the script?
If you're still in the play?
If you're still in my life?
You know I can't,
And that's your ace,
You've done it to plenty of other directors like me.
And you've always been a good actor.

Really,
we're just tourists to this big world we live in.

"I still have your books. Do you want to grab them and maybe get tea with me?"
Nov. 1st 2013

"I'm so sorry for bothering you last night."
Nov. 25th 2013

"You are killing me. I ******* hate that we can't talk."
Dec. 19th 2013

"I saw that you've been listening to Tom Waits' "Small Change" I hope you think about me when you listen to it."
Jan. 21st 2014

"God, do you know how ******* happy I am that we are getting back together?"
Feb. 10th 2014

"Please don't let this be the last time we talk. I can't lose you again."
Feb. 14th 2014

"Wow dude. You are ****** up. Your friends told me everything you've been doing."
Feb. 15th 2014

"You have no idea how much it means to me that you texted me about graduating. I was thinking about you during the entire ceremony and wished you were there to meet my parents."
May 16th 2014

"I wish you were here. It's my birthday."
July 12th 2014

"Happy Birthday. I remember last year when we went out with your family and it was so much fun. I love your family so much."
August 29th 2014

"I'm finally letting you go. I'm laying down the weight of you. I still love you, but I finally realize that I will never get to see you again or hear your voice. I wish you all the happiness in the world. You deserve it. Maybe one day we'll be able to talk but I'm not going to be hopeful about it anymore. I hope your dog is okay."
Oct. 23 2014