Lowry leanshanks came to town
riding a horse that was purple not brown.
He'd heard the sheriffs job was going
so into the ring his hat was throwing.
He might be strange and a little slim,
but who can run away from him?
His arms are thirteen metres wide,
no time to get away and hide!
Never had to use his gun,
Bullets miss him every one.
His purple horse may neigh and whinny,
but you can't shoot a man who is so skinny!
The jail was soon full of bad men,
like Cactus **** and Dust Bowl Ken.
The town was safe, the people happy,
they all so love the skinny Chappie!

Why do bracelets fit up our noses?
One of many problems life poses.
Such as how do nappies keep in the poo,
until it squirts out and lands in my shoe.
Food is fun to play with and throw.
Toys taste good, though Mum says "No!"
Pets are for hugging,
sisters for bugging.
Tears can come after laughing,
but go quickly with hugging.
One thing goes well with all the above,
the happy wee children surrounded with love.

Somewhere there lives in my flat

A creature with a very long tail

It is a silly old big fat rat

That can only run as fast as a snail



He is so clumsy as he sneaks

Wobbling along across the mat

He makes me laugh when he squeaks

Because he is ever so fat



And one day he got stuck in my shoe

All I saw was his tail in the air

He just did not know what to do

Now I wonder if he is still there

Ozzy Oz is the Wizard if Oz,
a wee girl told me beacause because!
Over the rainbow and Toe-Toe too!
And the Tinny man wants to play with you.
When you're 2 it's so much fun,
watch it ten times, never be done.
Poor old Mum, poor old Dad,
at least when it's on She will never be sad!

Acorns lying by a tree,
plenty there for you and me.
but please be careful what you do,
for acorn legends all are true.
Pick up only one or two,
take them gently home with you.
Put them in a secret spot,
not too cold, not too hot.
Watch them shake, and hatch, then giggle!
Acorns are the eggs of squirrels!

we went to the supermarket,
took our cameras to photograph
homogenized colors like the milk
in between poses, we played catch with the packets of fish *****,
drew smiles on the condensation in the freezer aisle
chased around the boy (code name platypus) with the Rolex.
so we balanced:
primary-colored bell peppers –
on our heads
and waited for the flash.

Under the oak there is a door,
do you wonder what it was put there for?
For fairies to get out to the world,
to watch the little boys and girls.

They keep an eye on each of you,
check the things you get up to.
Try and see you're safe from harm,
snuggled up at night and warm.

When you're there, they hide and peep,
in the bushes, hidden deep.
So when you see a flower sway,
there's fairies watching as you play!

When fishes set umbrellas up
  If the rain-drops run,
Lizards will want their parasols
  To shade them from the sun.

My tumbly hurts,
my *** does too!
Perhaps I might go to the loo.
But up the stairs is dark and cold.
And scary worries take a hold.

Maybe something nasty's there?
To bite my feet and grab my hair.
Hiding in the shadows cast,
should I run up really fast?

No, I'll go back in the room,
Mum or Dad will be here soon.
If they won't go upstairs with me,
I'll wee behind Mum's big settee!

Something big is stalking me,
been on my trail since half- past three.
Wonder if it thinks  I'm dinner,
boy I wish that I was thinner.

Velociraptor or dinonychus,
please don't come and make a fuss.
If I end up in your tummy,
you'll find that I am far from yummy!

Now the footsteps seem quite loud,
wish that I was in a crowd.
I hope it eats me really quick,
and then I'll make it feel quite sick!

There's a Scaredysaurus in front of me,
trying to hide in an apple tree.
Watching him is so much fun,
each of his feet must weigh a ton!
Now he is up, whoops! Now he is not,
fell down and landed on his bott.
I'll go and see that he's not hurt,
wipe his nose and clear the dirt.
Then, forget that apple tree.
Scaredysaurus, come home with me!

If wishes were fishes,
I'd have a whole bunch.
Swimming in fishbowls,
Awaiting their lunch.

If wishes were french fries,
I'd have a caboodle.
Frying in the skillet,
To feed to my poodle.

If wishes were colors,
I'd have a rainbow.
Coloring the world,
In hues of magenta and mango.

If wishes were flowers,
I'd have a garden full.
Showing their pretty faces,
And smelling of taffy pull.

If wishes were mine,
I'd hand out a dozen.
To every girl and boy,
To each uncle and cousin.