i step into the shower,
my hair flowing down my back

and i hear the bathroom door open and close
-click
           you enter

i ask if you're coming in,

           you pull back the curtain
and you stand there
like a mountain,
          absolutely majestic

your skin warm and inviting

i push my hair behind my ears

you step into the shower
                the stream hits your body

like a waterfall in Minneopa
in the middle of a hot summer day.

you lay three fingers against me,
like an electric current
screaming "I want" over and over.

You bend down to kiss my forehead,
the water spreads over your face

and rushes between my legs

             you kiss my lips

you place your remaining ******* on my waist

I snap back into place:
sitting in a hard plastic chair
listening to a short bearded man
go on forever
about some dead philosopher
who has never touched me.

and again, you are far away

Hey
I know it's been a while
Since we've last both spoken.
I'm doing fine

                                            Except
I miss you sometimes
When I least expect it
I'm not really sure why
It's not like we were anything special
Maybe it's the look in your eye
In that one moment of vulnerability
When you tore off all the layers
Of protection
That you pull so tightly
Around you
Perfectly hiding you
Making you invincible from the world


Did that scare you?
That I saw that side?
Is that why you didn't call
Didn't leave even a note or an inkling
That you had the slightest interest
Or was your interest only for those few
Moments together


Like magic
Engulfing me completely
Intoxicating my senses
Filling me to the brim
With you and the possibility of more


More that will never come
Because you won't let it

I want you to know that I go
From spurts of anger to pain
When I think of you
And what we could have had
Sometimes I still hold hope
Before remembering
Stupid girl, it'll never work


You make me the highest of highs and the lowest of lows
And you don't even know it
Funny
Because I don't want you to
You don't deserve that
And at this rate you never will


Well this is getting long winded
And it's something you'll never see
Because really why would you?
You never even think of me!
So I guess it's time
To finish what I have to say
There's really nothing else
Other than
Goodbye

I hope you're doing fine
I hope you're doing well
I crave you all the time
but I try not to dwell.

I'm not in love with you
And you're not the one for me
But I hope you crave me too
So the thoughts feel less lonely.

You're the moon outside my window,
And the stars in my sky.
You're the wonders down below,
And the birds that fly by.

You're the fish in my sea,
And the foam on my waves.
You're the leaves on the trees,
And the rocks in the caves.

I hear you, and see you,
I smell you, and feel.
I taste you, and embrace you,
I kiss you, and heal.

You're the plots in my dreams,
And the patterns in my bed.
You're the stitches in my seams,
And the thoughts in my head.

You're everything I want,
And you're everything more.
You're the one I want to flaunt,
And you're the one I adore.

Silence and ***** looks
That's all we seem to be now
It used to not be like this
But it got like this somehow
We went form being best friends
To you barely looking my way
What did I do to deserve this?
Was it something I did or said?
Is there any way to resolve this?
So I don't lose my best friend…
Could we put aside our differences
So this friendship doesn't end?
Because you see this is really hurting me
I can't stand to be treated this way
It happened in the past
Where a "friend" stopped giving me the time of day
I wish that you would talk to me
So we could work whatever this is out
But instead you're just ignoring me
And constantly shutting me out
Hopefully we'll resolve this
And maybe be friends again
And maybe one day I'll be able to
Once again say that you're my best friend.

I’m ready to break open like a glass shattered into a million pieces
I don’t know how much more I can take before the pressure will make me crack
I feel their eyes on me, watching my every move
I know that they want me to make a mistake, they need it, they thrive on it
But I can’t do that, I have to keep pushing forward
I can’t let the pressure get to me, not yet
I can’t let them see what they are doing; if I do then they will win
I can’t let them win, THEY WILL NEVER WIN

What do you do about someone who is speaking publicly of you?

...beneath the ill and secretly in the shadows there
are the parts that reveal truth of which no one knows...

what do you do about people who once mattered no longer mattering?...
what do you matter?, to those of you who chose to....
what do you do about them talking about you...
what do you do when all they do is lie of you...
what do you do when they no longer matter
what do you do when I no longer matter to you?

what do you do?
when you are pale blue...

What do YOU do when-
no one loves YOU!