I am overflowing!
In but an instant, I am empty
Drained
And the water pours out my eyes
Like a river in spring
I watch them go
No part of me tries to pull them back
I sit on the ground
For my legs will not hold me
Their strength has left with my tears

If only I could lay in the earth
Let her swallow me up!
I am not bitter
This is not sweet
I do not even bite the inside of my cheek, or the back of my hand
Just letting that thing in my chest
That has been quiet all my life, ache
There is hope
But it is not in me
I will mourn, with all my heart
So this is loss?

It goes so much deeper than I thought it could.

We walk through the shadows
You will not hold my hand
Stubbornness is a thorn in your side
And a whip on my face
It smarts, as only words can
I think that I know better in my finite wisdom
You will not even look beyond the fogged glass before your eyes
I am no better
I cannot cleanse myself of my sins
They bite at my ankles and nip at my heels
When I look for rest they find me where none should go
It is in the foolishness of my own steps that they have followed
I have made the way
The blame is upon me
For my shoulders bear my own coat and not that of another
I am humble in my namelessness that you would call upon me
What is this to be known
And more so to answer with a voice that is so young in its speaking that her tongue crawls between the ivory of her teeth
This resent has made a home in me
I let the door open for light to come in
This has not come to pass
Now I act, on a halfhearted hinge
That I could usher in a hope
That will light itself within
Stubborn as I am in my plight
If only I was so strongly pressed in my foolish wanderings

Cover me with your wings
In this embrace
I will feel as you have felt to fly
As you learn a young, cloudless sky
May the sun kiss you even sweeter if you depart from me

I pray for wisdom
Not for age
It seems as the days roll by
That I always get one
Not so much the other

Attempting to stay centered
When I myself am storm
Just to be free
In thought and deed

I was given the most beautiful compliment today
The one twenty four in the morning girl told me
That I was God's ******* to Satan

Amen

What good is the kindness in your heart
If it doesn't reach the tip of your tongue
And cannot even find its way to the extremity of your hands

You still linger among me
As if you were cigarette smoke fingers running through my hair
No one else can smell you
But I always know you're there

Our perceptions are flawed in this
That we will look with our eyes
Listen with our ears, for even the quietest whisper
Yet we do not do the same with our hearts
To find colors in words spoken with a trembling breath
With the sobs hidden in the laughter we so quickly discard
Oh dreamer, let your pride pass
That you would see all things come to pass

You told me you knew what love was
Yet even the bones of your house are cold
You lie with your tongue between your teeth
I cannot wonder how you sleep at night

I will die tonight
As I have done before
Still I must remember
To say my prayers
For tomorrow is a new day
Bathed in new light
I could not bear
To tarnish her
With the memory of my sins

I am not untouchable
For I am human
In my tangibility