I wrapped my arms around myself.

And the voice in my head whispered,
"Retreat into your shell,
they will never break it,
like they broke you before."

My heart echoed in agreement, as it retreated into the abyss.

I say your name like a prayer
The last thing I sing before I die
I press the beads to my lips
And the tears I cry

there are so many kinds of love
which of them do I deserve
how many days do I get
as a slave, to serve

this many nights
to prepare to fall apart
so many days to try
beating without a heart

which of these lies
do you hold most dear
could you give them up
so you could sleep here

fingertips apart from you
as you lay in the ground
you reached up to me
I would not fall down

could you blame me
for the heart you ******
the drugs you bled
you have not atoned

louder than your lies
I scream about the night
wishing to flood your eyes
with tears of light

poison in my flesh
at the end of a blade
all the cards dealt
but this last *****

if you breathed me in
it would be your last
today is over
the night does not pass

Hell! Hell! Hell!
I see it in my mind
demons writhing alive
inside of my spine

every kiss to my hand
like a claim upon my soul
every piece taken
a lesser part of a whole

this is death
and it is so cold
like the ice in my heart
in to it I fold

how an ending is made
from the dying of the stars
so distant they looked
a lie to think they are far

it pierced my face
and sunk into my dreams
as dark as it was
it broke the seams

to fall apart
ripped to shreds
by the night
in mine own head

how can I save you!
when I am but a shell
to drag you down
to where I dwell

so much further
have I yet to fall
you cry to come
and I cry all

and oh the wretch
that I have become
all my threads
have come undone