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 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
"Catch up",I said, "Catch up",
But it was he always trailing
Dragging those new shoes
Though they were sand paper
Until the toes nothing but
Dust.
Then the new top itched
Like a foreign skin
So you punctured it
Stretching and pulling
Until the zip almost
Popped.
What were you brother
So angry and gaged?
You grew up to be
An amazing parent.
Better than I.
For my brother Dear Richard eighteen months my junior.
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
I think of you little mummy
When the snow gathers round your gravestone
Creeping up the sides of the white marble
Touching the words with its soft hands
Covering the overturned urn
As the last flowers lay like a fan
Uniting you and daddy
Under the lightest eiderdown.

Love Mary your daughter .
Christchurch Totland with the lamb sculpture on the front wall.
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
Your hands are stiff but I take them
Feeling how cold in spite of the sun
But today we will drive you to Ventnor
It's been sad these years without Mum.

The wind is light and the sky azure
Memories flood through my brain
Today we will drive you to Ventnor
Have lemonade and ice- cream again.

Love Mary ***
Roger , my father ,Bill, and I went to Ventnor one day
And we had a wonderful day dad with you .mary ***
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
In a field at the edge where
The Burnet's reproduced
Their dark wings with six red spots
Giving birth on our hands
From inside their chrysalis.

Mating from egg, larvae
To pupae and adult moth
Took about three weeks
We went almost everyday
The hot sun stroking our backs.

This was our moth Summer
Guiding our courtship with
Fluttering wings and newness
Stepping through the railings
To gain this precious time.
Burnet moths have dark matalic background colour and six red spots on their two
forewings . The caterpillar is green with black spots and is poisonous.They feed on clover, birds-foot trefoil and grassland flowers where it is sandy.
They are stunning moths but only live a few days after laying their eggs .Moths like knapweed and scabious.
#mk
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
We jumped in feet first
Slightly unbalancing the craft
Red it was, a catamaran with
Those pedals and oars, difficult
To steer.
My pink pinafore got splashed
And dad's beautiful face laughed
The pleasure of being a child,
Ruddy cheeks, generous mouth.
It was just me and him,
A boat for two, as we spun
Round and round trying to get
Started in a direction.

Out in the shallow sea we bobbed along
Only had half-an-hour before call in.
Our feet got wet in our shoes
And we smiled and smiled
I loved my dad that day
In his stripped top.

Love Mary x
For my dad Bill love Mary ***
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
Happiness is hairy legs
And a crimplene skirt
Cheap sandels on a patch of sand
Favourite sky with its clouds
Egg sandwiches and cheese
A mackintosh to sit upon
An old sunhat
The peace which is this day
Uninterrupted love.
This was my mother's loves .On Totland Bay by the boat house.***
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
We took the gangway hand in hand
Turning on the sheltered rail
Clinging to our clipped tickets
Stating date and hour.
And up we ran our childish feet
All glorious for the open deck
And spread our arms to clap
The wind as speedily it did hit.

The water sunned in glistening troughs
The Solent with its spray
And at the bars and ropes we played
Waved to the sailing craft.
The captain in his tower room
Hooted now and then
And then turned a steep bend
To the Island that was our friend.

And bouncing on the harbour wall
Fell clambering down the steps
Broke the sunshine with our eyes
Never to forget.
Love Mary x
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
He was lean, his aesthetic back stretches
Into neat trunks tied at the waist with cord
Sand sprinkled dipping in the circular pool
Where the shells and seaweed floated about
Like newly washed hair his shade of brown.

And this is how I remember him next to me
With our spades and colourful beach towels
Our clothes draped across rocks in the sun
And those plastic sandels with the salty buckles
Cutting into our fleet especially when new.

We were not very affectionate but occasionally
Romped the floors in our nightclothes at bed
Dragging the eiderdowns, downwards in disarray
And taking a length of string between bedrooms
So that we could keep connected by a joining tug.

This was childhood at its most fierce and beautiful
Before adolescence set its patterns on our forms
Marked us out for education and dress codes
Until then we were still securely latched in time
Asking each other, now and then, for piggy backs.


Love Mary for her brother ,Richard.
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
My father had a propensity for a peculiar type of sparseness.
Enhanced with items of furniture collected from many sources.
Not a mean man but coming from a very poor family off Labrook Grove in London his few possessions were meaningful.

In the 1970s my parents moved to Totland to take up residence in a new bungalow on The Isle Of Wight, situated overlooking rambling countryside and narrow, windy lanes.
There was a wide but shortish back garden needing to be established. The front garden a sloped bank to meet the pavement.
Mother brought with her, from Streatham her London home, favourite hardy shrubs easily transplanted.

My father retired early finding the strain of being a hospital administrator at St Georges Hospital, Hyde Park Corner, too taxing.
Recruitment was problematic and mainly filled with applicants from overseas.(Not much has changed in fifty years.)My mother wanted to spend time with Frank, her father, sharing his latter years at Totland where he and his wife, Gwen, lived overlooking the Solent on a considerable plot of land.
This included the new bungalow built about 1952-4 and designed by John Westbrook, Frank's son, and acres of beautifully planned flower gardens, a vegetable patch and large wooded area where the trees held tiny toys, to the magic of Tolkein. As children this place was as close as one could get to paradise.

Usually we entered by the back lane entrance rather than from The Alum Bay Road. The plot stretching between the two.
The rows of backgarden fences looked much the same
Crumbling and split wooden planks, large tree roots
Dividing up the length and making mysterious openings
Where rather dilapidated gates, latched firmly
So animals could not stray,
Allowed for the start of magic.
Out of all these fences one belonged to my grandparents and
Through which our travels to Narnia began.

So twenty, mainly, glorious years on The Island, enjoying its many beautiful walks, the beaches and a few precious friends and neighbours. It had been my mother's dream to inherit her father's bungalow and spend her final years watching the boats float on the Solent and breathe sea air sitting on a swinging seat surrounded by primroses. Unfortunately this dream did not materialise due to my mother's poor health. But she was grateful for the years Bill and herself  had together on that green and pleasant land.

My maternal grandparents were, quietly distinguished, letter writers
Who embroidered their days with poetic licence. They had few visitors, apart from the local vicar, the vet and gardener. Gwen being a rather possessive and eccentric lady and having no children of her own, treated the dog as one would a child and life centred around dog walks, feeding and playtime. Frank was also frail and being older than Gwen needed much care and attention.They both liked to read and write letters which they did after lunch with an added snooze. Every day flowed with regularity and neat routines interspersed with many hours tending the garden, picking raspberries from heavily laden canes and gathering long, plump runner beans.
Throughout the Summer months high tea was set in the garden on a rickety table, and consisting of thick slices of current bread coated in salt free butter, a variety of homemade cakes, sandwiches, and ice cream and jelly with a *** of tea or lemonade.
I am reminded of 'The Bloomsbury Set' and Vita Sackville -West, a tranquil but harassed life with too much need for perfection.


Geographically some distance from our London home visits, both ways, were infrequent and by the time I was about nine Frank was too old to travel to Streatham. However their presence formed a significant part of our lives and is still with me today.
Unfortunately letter writing was for my brother and I a chore not undertaken with glee,
Especially as the gift was often a box of embroidered hankies sat in someone's drawer for an age.

The family structure, having married in their fifties, consisted of Frank and Gwen, Mother and always a wire haired terrier, often renewed as age took this species young. Mother was in her nineties and having brought up Gwen and Kath singularly now lived with her daughter in the bungalow at Totland on the Alum Bay Road.

Frank had been part of the Boy's Brigade movement from his teens, taking his love of camping into his marriage to Alexandra Emily Giles, the mother of his two daughters, Grace Emily and Betty Rose. His wife sadly died in childboth leaving the girls orphaned at five and seven.
Frank then moved from Reading to Tooting in south London and married Vera, a girl of twenty one, to whom he had a son, John.
Vera was flirtatious with the boys in the brigade and left Frank and her son, John, at the age of nine, to the care and protection of my mother Grace who was then eighteen. Grace loved them both but it restricted her life and she feared she would never marry. However she found my father, a wonderfully loving and wholesome person who made her very happy in most ways.

Throughout my mother's and John's childhood time was spent camping on the Isle of Wight and so strong associations were made with Totland where the brigade camped in a field in Court Road.

The two bungalows were approximately two to three miles apart.
My mother visited Gwen and her father twice a week spending
A couple of hours sitting in the open planned hallway, glass doored, which faced onto the Alam Bay Road. If warm it would be brunch in the garden at the back. These visits were my mother's anchorage with her life as she missed me very much and her grandchildren in Watford.

Innisfail (meaning- The Ireland of Belonging) was the name of my grandparents' bungalow. ( please see below for more lengthy meaning and interpretation, kindly, written  by John Garbutt).

My parents' bungalow was named  'Crowhurst'  and carved on a wooden plaque as a present by John Garbutt my auntie Betty's partner. The origin of the name came from a retreat that my father, Bill, attended and connected to a church in Streatham where I lived as a child.

Almost all my childhood annual holidays were taken on the Island so we could visit our grandparents and my mother spend time with her father. After my parents moved and I married and had children the pattern was repeated. And till this day it is a favourite with all my children and grandchildren. A special place fixed in time and beauty.

The bungalows are both sold now as their residents have all died.
Clearing out the garage of my parents' bungalow my brother found many of my father's precious possessions although the house was quite sparse still having the wooden floorboards laid when first built twenty years before.

May they all rest in peace .Love Mary ***

My Family and our long and happy connections with The Isle Of Wight. By Mary Kearns April 2018.
John Garbutt wrote the following piece on the meaning of the name 'Innisfail'.

My belief that the place-name came from Scotland was abandoned
on finding the gaelic origins of the name.
‘Inis’ or ‘Innis' mean ‘island’, while ‘fail’ is the word for
Ireland itself. ‘Innisfail’ means Ireland. But not just
geographically: the Ireland of tradition, customs, legends
and folk music, the Ireland of belonging.
So the explanation why the Irish ‘Innisfail’ was adopted as the name
of a town in Alberta, Canada, and a town in Australia,
can only be that migrants took the name, well  over a century ago
to their new homelands, though present-day Canadians
and Australians won’t have that same feeling about it.

------------------------------------------------------------­---------
The bungalow was designed by John Westbrook, who was an architect, as a wedding present for his father and Gwen Westbrook.
I do believe he also designed the very large and beautiful gardens.
I no longer know whether the bungalow is still standing or what it may be called .Mary xxxx
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
Often we approached the bay over high ground
Taking the track from Totland between the heather
Where the small blue butterflies dusted the grass
With a fluttering sparkle and the gorse spoke yellow.
The climb to the top was arduous with many stops
Sitting on prickles, the scent of sheep buzzing
Around our ears and nostrils and filling sandels.
A rest refreshed with that thermos coffee hot on lips.
Then in an instant we came out of shadow to meet
The white glare off the sea and a downward decent
Across grassland filled with thistles
To drop
Through style and gate and down onto the road.

Love Mary
13 lines
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
For just that, I opened my eyes to watch the seagulls
Circle the cliff face, swooping and diving,
Black and white above viridian tides.
On top deck of those cream and green country buses
That bumbled along, taking the dips and hollows
As though a 'Big Dipper' at Margate.
There was such little stopping the journey
Seemed seemless as the sky.
And we,
Hanging out the window to catch the wind.

Love Mary x
Taking the middle road to Freshwater.
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
Twilight fell on me
Changing gold to tawny brown
Gathering the ripples in my shirt
To undulating shades
Of greens and violet
And my socks turned grey.

In front I stretched out
Long, thin and faded
Merging into the dusk
And the trees
Accompany me
But without strides.

Love Mary x
Walking from Freshwater Bay , past the Peacock to Colewell Common then left back to Freshwater Village and home, with Bill whistling.***
 Apr 2018
Mary Gay Kearns
Until March the Peacock stayed in
Keeping his eyes to himself.
Afraid of the rain and coldness of earth
The snowy harsh ice.

But Spring filled his garden with flowers
The trees fluttered with bees
And the sunshine on his feathers
Asked him to open his wings, please!

For a Peacock is a man of display
Loved the people as that passed
Stalked the grass of his grounds
And fanned us all at last.
Monks Lane I.oW.
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