The darkness,
It started out as a small drop,
In the center of my chest,
And like a *cancer,
It spread throughout my whole body.

It swam in my veins,
Coated my lungs,
And swallowed me whole.
It seeped through my skin,
And began to form around me,
A black cloud, I've become a shadow.

This darkness feels like it's all I've ever known,
I don't know who...what I am anymore,

But sometimes...something magical happens.
Him.
He's danced with my shadows,
And blown away the clouds,
And I slowly feel this darkness peeling away.

The day he told me he loved me,
I swear it was like he beamed a *flashlight,
Right at my heart.

*I think he knows how to turn the lights on.

If I had the right voice,
If I could find the right notes,
The right beat, rhythm,
I would turn this poetry into a song.

Who would listen to music this depressing?

I would.
Many would.
Especially those who know my pain,
Can relate to this music.

I want to show the dark side of the world that only few know,
And make those lonely souls know,
That someone cares.
They're not alone,
We are family,
Unspoken blood runs through our veins.

So...

Someday, if I find all that,

*Let me sing you to sleep, my brothers and sisters.

My face is round
My jaw is square
My hair is short
And my skin is fair

These locks are red
But fade to brown
And I've got freckles
All around

My lips are curved
In a permanent pout
My eyes look sad
Without a doubt

My brows are flat
And though I've tried
Most find it hard
To look me in the eye

If you're one of the few
To gaze towards me
You'll see these pools
Of hazel-green.

My ******* are C’s
But you can't tell
For most of the time
I hide them well

My curves are small
I have thick thighs
So please don't look
At my slightly plump size

I looked in the mirror
And all I saw
Was an image of me
And all my flaws

Now you know
What's behind this screen
And under all that
I am me.

At night I lie awake,
My mind begins to run away from the reality
I wish to escape

Sometimes I am a poet,
Sitting at my mahogany desk,
Writing in perfect calligraphy,
That I've spent millions of years perfecting,
The ink from my quill staining this parchment,
Painting my thoughts unto the world,
Better than my brush ever could.

Sometimes I am a singer,
Staring into the void of an auditorium,
Breathing out my heart and soul,
For a small group of people,
That have suddenly become my universe.

Sometimes I am in his arms,
Soft kisses brushing the hairs atop my head,
His arms around me,
His heartbeat matched only by my own,
Our song quietly escaping his lips,
Lulling me to sleep.

Or…

Millions of light-years away,
Where I no longer am me,
I just am.
I am one with everything,
The glowing gas clouds,
Sparkling,
Filled with millions,
Billions,
Trillions, of tiny stars.

The stars reflected in my eyes,
Their fire setting my heart ablaze,
And I lose all thought.

There,
Among the stars,
I am free...

Do you know where my heart has gone?
It's supposed to be in my chest,
Nestled in my warm rib cage.
I know it's been missing for a long time,
But it's mine.  It was made for me, and I was made for it.
I can't give up on my precious heart now.
Not ever.
.
.
.
It ran away.
It didn't even say anything.
Yes, I had my suspicions, but I wasn't sure if it was safe to believe.
By now, it's hundreds of miles away,
Sitting right there.
In your hands.

I must ask of you, fearsome person.
Protect my dear heart.
It is frail, and timid.
Keep it warm at night,
And make sure it stays happy.
From here on, *I give you my heart.

A lonely white cloud glides through an otherwise clear blue sky
Minutes, hours, days pass
Just as the cloud loses hope and begins to fade away, the blue sky blends into a dark gray
Just up ahead, the little white cloud finds a family
The cloud is welcomed as one of their own, and the join together, growing darker and darker together
They say farewell to each other, and transform into even smaller raindrops, about to embark on their own journeys
One of which includes falling on and around a sad girl, on a quiet hill
She's crying
Little does she know that her tears join the falling rain on a path to something beautiful
The droplets find their way deep into the soil of that quiet hill
And there, they find a surprise
It's a seed
Eager to befriend it, the droplets gather around, and nurture the seed
Months and years pass, as something begins to grow
A little green sprout starts to stretch tall, as it loses its greenness that is replaced by a dark brown color
More and more raindrops find their way to the sprout, encouraging it to grow even bigger
It reaches up into the sky, and spreads giant branches, and those branches house leaves
The little seed, with the help of the clouds and the rain, became a tree.

Decades later, that tree has gone on to be a home for many
Birds, squirrels, caterpillars,
It even becomes a place of good memories for a family
A mother and father, and their little boy and girl
And do you know who that mother is?

Well, she used to be a sad little girl, who sat on a quiet hill and cried.

I love the way your hazel eyes dazzle when you look at me
I love the way those same eyes wrinkle at the edges when you smile
I love the pitchy way you hum when you have a song stuck in your head
I love the cute way you tilt your head when I say something that you like
I love when you text me just to tell me you love me and miss me
I love the cheesy little hearts you make with your hands when you send me pictures of yourself
I love the way your eyes open wide and te way your voice gets a little louder when you speak of your passions
I love how you pay attention to the things I like and don't like, and take advantage of that just to make me smile
I love how you can push away all of my sad and scary thoughts at night without even trying.  All I need is to think of you and I feel like I'm glowing
I love the way you say my name, and all the other nicknames you give me
I love how you notice all the little things I do and say
I love the curly, messy dark hair of yours that you hate
I love that you opened my eyes and showed me happiness when I was lost for so long
I love that you taught me how to smile openly without hiding it
I love your dorky laugh
There are so many little and big things that I love about you, but my favorite thing about you,
Is that /you love me/
For exactly who I am.
Thank you.