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annie Nov 2013
somebody
anybody
save me
take me away
from my early demise

to put it bluntly
I'm freaking out
I think
I might be going insane
but it's okay
I'm just
"overreacting"

maybe if these screams
trapped inside
would finally burst out
I would be
unclogged
cleansed
free of my sins
my sorrows
disappointments
          to me you everyone

cantcantcantcantcant
helphelphelphelp
saveme
please

ma­ke me happy
make me free
please
somebody
anybody
annie Nov 2013
idk
I don't know
why my brain
works the way it does
I mean
I know
it's not right
but I don't think
there's any
other way
to do this

I can't handle
the constant
disgust
displeasure
utter delusion
looking in the mirror
looking at my arm
I'm so
over
this
annie Oct 2013
You ask me
For my feelings
But darling
Those are too strong
I cannot dilute them down
Enough for you

I can tell you I love you
But will you accept it?
I've gone so long
Trying to show
There does not exist such a thing
And I'm sorry
Because it is
True

I can tell you I need you
And I'm so thankful
For every second
Of every minute
Spent talking to you
And I'm sorry
Because it is too far, too
True

I can tell you I'm sorry
For I've been far too harsh
In every word
Trying to portray indifference
As if I can't feel these things
And I'm sorry
Because I really am,
Truly
annie Oct 2013
you say
you wish
you were someone else
you wish
you could have their abilities
and darling
you are not perfect
you will never be
but in the most
imperfectly perfect way
you make it work
and you work it
and it works well
so never think
you should be
someone else
never think
you can be
too you
annie Oct 2013
slim chance
of going back
to what you were
who you were
(it's too late)
your hopes
not shattered
but simply
slimmed down
bit
by dwindling bit
(to nothing)
grinding away
you start to hope
they would just
leave
quick
(like a bandaid)
and take
the demons
too
leaving you
with
n.o.t.h.i.n.g.
annie Sep 2013
ach
there is so much
flowing through my brain
but not positive things
negative energies
no
not those
just
thoughts

eating is bad
i cannot stop
eating is good
i must use moderation
but can i
or is this
another classic example
of all or nothing
annie Sep 2013
******* triggered
kinda funny
how it's always
the same thing

substance

food

things i should need
do need
should want
do want
don't want
at least
the biggest part
doesn't want them
the biggest part
how odd
that that's what it has become
that that's how i've ended up
consumed
by ana
no more
anya
no more
fat
thanks
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