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cjesus Aug 26
I’m drifting through space with no direction
Nothing to guide me
Nothing to hold onto
Everything that seems within my reach
Slips away
I just keep falling
With nothing to catch me
No one to catch me
Everything feels dark and cold
I live a nightmare that never ends
Morning seems lifetimes away
I see a light and stretch my hand towards it
Fingers outreached I try to get closer
But the nearer I get to the light
The dimmer it becomes
Until the light is no more
Nothing more than a figment
The darkness consumes me
Loneliness eats away at me
While I starve
Craving  a companion
Any contact to subside the isolation
Anything to fill the void
cjesus Aug 20
Our relationship
A cup of cold coffee
And left unattended
cjesus Jul 29
I run
not sure from who
I hide
not sure why
I am afraid
But I can’t escape
Because what I fear the most
Lies beneath my face
cjesus Jul 1
I find power in the deepest parts of me
The pain and torture that has been inflicted
Has created a black hole in my chest
It is cold
It is dark
But from this darkness comes light
A power so strong
It cannot be held back
Agony is transformed
Its energy altered
Into something constructive
From the depths of my soul
Comes love
So strong
So pure
It cannot be constrained
And it is all thanks to pain
For without it I could never truly know love
cjesus Jul 1
I"m sorry if I'm not enough
I'm sorry if I'm too much
I'm sorry that I'm sorry
I worry that I give too much
Try too hard
So I pull back
And then worry I'm not giving enough
So I try harder
Like a child on a teetertotter
Never able to balance it evenly
cjesus Jul 1
My love is like the ocean
Waves of it surge forward
Towards the shore
Pushing and pulling
I grow nearer and nearer
But every time
Right before I'm close enough
The moon pulls me back
I retreat
Deeper and deeper
Never quite reaching my goal
cjesus Jul 1
Stuck in an infinite cycle
Like a song left on repeat


Despite my ultimate demise
I always get up
Just to fall again
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