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Claudia Ramirez Dec 2012
She is the ***** that makes your fears seem like falling snow
Even war makes a more peaceful sound then her breaking down mentally words
Yet, some how you still love her
And in every one’s eyes she is any angel
“Who could be better?” they say

I try to not listen and go to my own world
But she is there in every corner.
Turning every hope and dream in to something sick and twisted.
She can take it all back and make it look like a joke that got out of hand
Making you think she is as innocent as your first kiss

How can some one have such power with words?
Words that bring nightmares but that can also heal you
Claudia Ramirez Dec 2012
I begin to wonder into gardening, so many flowers to choose from
My first try was not the best, even though I tried really hard  
It almost seem like they hated me, they looked lovely but they had a deathly poison
It did not get easier, but I learned a few things a long the way as this passion continued.

Then one day, when I was going to give up I found a flower
Maybe not the pretties but with time it bloom in to something my heart could not believe
Something that let me know that my hand could do something
And let my plant know that there was love.

Things got rough and I had to travel and could not take my garden of Darwinias
I tried to give them the same love but they started to slowly die
Every now and then they do respond well. I just hope they can me it till I get back
But I too started to lose my hope…
They are in my mind very often but I’ve started to look for a new flower

I got blinded once again; I choose the flowers that would not bloom
I tried to find something that could compare to my Darwinia but nothing ever could
The Kerria japonica came in to my way with its bright yellow and made my heart stop
I still love my original garden but this; this just took my breath away it made my soul feel warm
They could not just grow anywhere
Claudia Ramirez Nov 2012
Can it be true? Is there really a man as perfect as the moon?
A man who is there for you every night to light up your face and dreams
Who if far away but still gives you strength.
Always looking down at you letting you see which road to take,
He might not hold you when you cry but you can still feel his warmth
He holds your secrets, fears and keeps you heart safe.
Leaving in the morning but coming every night, not letting you spend them alone
Can it be true? Is there really a man as perfect as the moon?
Claudia Ramirez Nov 2012
I worry more then I should.
You are strong but I can not help to worry,
Think about you and wonder If your okay
If you need a shoulder too cry on
Or simply, someone to make you smile
Someone to tell you “it will all work out”
Someone you can hold…
I’m a thousand miles away
So there is not much I can do
Just hope and pray that you think about me,
And that when you do, you smile…not cry

I think more than I should.
You are probably sleeping, something I can not do at the moment,
Thinking if we will ever sleep in each other’s arms
Thinking about how peaceful you are right now,
Not having to think about anything, just dreaming
While I am stuck here with endless thoughts
Ideas that seem to never end
Ideas that bring me an unclear map
Claudia Ramirez Nov 2012
I never understood longing,
Until I stop seeing your smile.
That smile that makes every word very believable
It would make me blush,
And want to sing to the world.  
With such warm feeling of love,
That not even when I closed my eyes at night did I feel alone.
Just with the tone of your voice I knew you were smiling
Knowing that I smiled as well

Your hands, without exception knew what to do.
Holding me when I felt lost,
Wiping my tears when no one else would,
Your hands felt like the spring breeze against my soft face,
Letting me know that I had a home
It has been a while since the last time you hold me
Now, I am just hungry for human touch
Learning what true aching is.
Claudia Ramirez Oct 2012
It is dark and cold, and it feels like I’ve been here for hours… maybe even days.
Where exactly am I?
How did I get to this cold and empty place where no human hands could give me warmth?
Where animals do not even dare to come.
I try to think, but the bitterness of this place distracts me

I start to walk but I begin feeling this icy numbness.
I want to continue however I just collapse on the never ending ground  
Every thing just starts getting darker and darker
My eyelids getting heavier …

My head is spinning
I touch my face and realize my hand feel frozen
How long was I out?
The silence of this place bring fear to my mind and pain to my heart
Causing me to shake and I begin to sob
As I do the tears become frozen on my red cheeks.
What has caused this sudden lament?

I start to walk but I begin feeling this icy numbness.
I want to continue however I just collapse on the never ending ground  
Every thing just starts getting darker and darker
My eyelids getting heavier …

A movie starts to play
Of a young man
With eyes that had a smile of their own
A smile that makes you want to join him,
Nice, big yet gentle hands that just told you to play with them.
A voice that made you believe in the impossible as if it could make your dreams come true.

I wake up once more and I hope it’s the last time.
I can not take more of this wilderness and all I can think is
who is that young man? I want to be with him.

The movie starts up again
And there is that young man again but this time….
His eyes do not smile; they are full of tears
He has lost hope; now his words speak only of loneliness
As blood fall to the floor from his arms

Now more then ever do I want to be with that young men
Because I know
That once I was the person, who brought that smile to his eyes,
And that this forest of gloominess is ours.
I need to find him and help him out
With the result that this will stop being the forest of Aokigahara.
Claudia Ramirez Oct 2012
A year ago,
the thought of ever saying bye
never came to our minds
but now
you barely have time for me.

lately
I feel like I'm the only one who
thinks of promise we once said.
When I talked you
it was always just write
but now
your words feel so cold and harsh.

A year ago
we were so happy
we even wanted to get married,
but now
your hopes are gone
and say love is a lie.

lately
I've been feeling like just giving up
and leaving every one alone.
you would miss me
but for how long?

A year ago
we still believe in love
and our heart weren't so beaten

Now
I just want to end my life
I don't want to stop believing in love
I would be happy
knowing you were the first and last person I loved
I'm just sad and trying to get things of my chest....
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