you smile...

and then,
   and then

*I know no more

When your around I'm scared you'll hear my pounding heart,
and so I walk away.
I hate this little fear of mine, that you won't like me back,
and so I say nothing.
I'm scared of what my friends might think, and that they will tell,
so I keep this to myself.
When I hear my name called in the hall way, I hope it is you,
but it never is.
And so I keep hoping, that maybe someday I'll find the courage,
to tell you how I feel.

Next time you tell me to go away
I'll show you just how good I am at disappearing
You just haven't stuck around long enough for the
vanishing act
You have the audacity to
say my name tastes like filth
But have you ever thought
that the source of your uncleanliness
was born somewhere in your lung's
and made its way up your throat
I can taste that
when I kiss you
No wonder everything turn's to grit
in your mouth
You have the stones
to say
you're an insomniac
But there's a difference between
not wanting to sleep
and not being able to
And your hands wouldn't shake so much
if you didn't drink so much coffee
and you wouldn't look so tired
If you smiled once in a while
and your breath wouldn't taste
or smell
or look
like ****
if you didn't smoke
100 packets a day.
So you have the audacity to tell me
"Well, baby the truth hurts."
In that southern drawl
With eyes so animated
I wonder which movie star you're impersonating now
After four months of Kurt Cobain
I've had enough of your angst and love letters
And I'd love to lay
my hands against your throat
and let you feel the threat
of life
draining away
But I know you would just smile
and rack your brain
for a quote from a movie you have stored somewhere
away

Putting things into perspective, everything is becoming more clear.
It might be a sudden change of heart or maybe it’s because you are here.
Putting the puzzle together, everything is in its place,
pointing me in the right direction, wiping the tears off my face.
Maybe it’s the way that you held her, that made me strive for the same.
Everything comes back to you, for the good things I have you to blame.
You led me to this freedom, you’ve cleared me a yellow-brick-road.
Helping me find myself, my place in life, my home.
And there’s no place like home.

Love comes effortlessly
When we least expect it
Opening up our hearts
In whole new ways
Allow the love to shine through
Don't let love pass you by

There are times
Times where I think I hate you
My heart tends to tell me otherwise
It is jealousy controlling me
I want to be with you
To feel the comfort of your strong arms
Please don't walk away again
To spend time with everyone else
It seems that others are stealing you
We belong together
My heart tells me so
My brain says to stay away
Deep down the truth remains
Waiting for a time to reveal itself
Your truth already has
I can tell by the way you compliment me
The way you tell my I'm special
I love you involuntarily
Not realizing the problems to come
I am jealous of girls you look at
IYou feel the same about me
One day this will all be resolved
Whether through marriage or not
To each other or somebody else
We shall always love each other
Our friendship never failing

In my head,
You’re perfect.
You’re never wrong.
Never a bad decision,
Always where you belong.
But I chose to ignore the rumors,
Some which could be true.
I refuse to believe,
Anything bad about you.