It makes me feel so angry; if only I hadn't spoken

I fell for someone who didn't love me, now I feel so broken.

I hug myself and refuse the tears, and feel inside so numb.

I fell for someone who didn't love me; how was I so dumb?

I knew he would pick her over me, so why am I still sad?

I fell for someone who didn't love me; thinking I'd be glad.

I collapse onto my bed, hoping my sorrow will disperse.

I fell for someone who didn't love me; could it be a curse?

I swipe at my eyes, not able to stop crying so ceaselessly

I fell for someone who didn't love me; how so easily?

Tears fall down my cheeks; he made my weak heart break.

I fell for someone who didn't love me; that was my mistake.

They get excited over the waves flowing when I walk by.
They look so weak
And I feel so strong
But then it’s all the same
I feel like this makeup is warpaint and my short dress sometimes turns into armor.
Honestly
I would wash over the world with my waters and crush buildings with the wind at my command.
But I can’t
Instead I have a flute playing wonderful songs and all these boys follow me into the ocean.
To drown
While I lay there unsatisfied

If I push forward
will i fall out the other side?

A portal to the future
where everything is more bright with florescent lighting and cold linoleum floors to fall on.

If i stick my hands through the mirror
each shard bypassed; easily now
then the universe tilts and i am suspended in time.

Falling softly into my future self,
gripping onto what i only know to be true.

Biting the fleshy bits of my lips
as i censor these tiny screams of frustration…

Its okay to let them echo.

No one can hear them except me.

Too lazy to be ambitious,
I let the world take care of itself.
Ten days' worth of rice in my bag;
a bundle of twigs by the fireplace.
Why chatter about delusion and enlightenment?
Listening to the night rain on my roof,
I sit comfortably, with both legs stretched out.

I am a package
Full of lies
And years of careful
Deceit.

I am the wind
Roaring, howling
In the night, for
Everything that isn't.

I am water
Dripping, slowly
Down soft warm skin in
The dead of the night.

I am a scream
Muffled, a
Dull throb in a
Bleeding heart.

I am whispers.
I am darkness.
I am guilt.
I am pleas.

I am lies,
Years of
Carefully constructed
Lies.

One day I went fishing, unloaded at the dock
And picked up on the sadness that the earth was giving off
No matter where I wandered, I always felt its pain
It matched the kind inside of me for it was all the same
The day had passed so quickly, the night would soon be here
Intensify despondency and make me disappear
I knew I needed something, the thought had not caught on
'Til weariness displaced my bones in ground I walked upon