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Chris Balase Jul 2019
My annoying wavy hair
was the curse and my ridicule
when I was young.

"Curly hair is a plague!"
They ghast!
Lashing down my confidence.

How annoying was to comb it
wishing to have
the same straight hair as my peers

Until the day I lost most of it.

Now I miss my annoying hair
I miss people noticing it
I miss brushing it
I miss being annoyed by it...

the same way I miss the annoying You.
I miss our little quarrels
our mishaps
our hugs
our tears
I miss people talking bad about us
I miss the anger brought by our love
I miss the midnight talks
I miss the times we don't speak
  because we were afraid to make things worse
I miss our secret adventures
Our saddest mistakes
your annoying voice
your angry stare
and all your negativity

Like my annoying hair
I wished that I had done everything
to keep you
I wished that
I held on one last time.

I miss my annoying hair
the same way that I miss
my annoying life with you


It's annoying.
Chris Balase Jul 2019
Science proves that time-traveling is possible
and how quantum physics have shown
that moving through time into the future
is easier and more plausible
than going back

Perhaps it really means:

That we were not supposed
to revert back
to our what ifs
and the would've been's

Like the time when
the world was our oyster
in the presence
of our once perfect world

Perhaps it means:

That our tears had flowed
fulfilling its purpose
Or our knees have been bruised
for an apparent reason

And our mistakes and disasters
have cultivated
the new life we live
at the moment

Perhaps the dagger
struck within our soul
was indeed inscribed
with our blueprint for pain

Perhaps our weakened state
is where our blessings
vehemently lies

Perhaps,
we were never meant
                     to look back.
Chris Balase Jul 2019
Perhaps love is not for me
Maybe a vagabond
Is what I ought to be
Forever hoping
Always seeking
But never finding
Whom I was meant to be.

Yea, perhaps love is not for me.
Chris Balase Jun 2019
Once, the world was perfect
As the leaves sway in spring time
And the cold breeze of the midnight air
Spikes some chills through our minds.

Once, everything was alright
Like a dream we forsee our future bright
Like a lullably from our mother's womb
Nostalgia hits our every line of sight.

Once, we were complete
No missing pieces to be found
No shattered dreams, no regrets
No poignant teardrops abound.

Perhaps time has betrayed us
Or perhaps it's the other way around
For non could've forsaken us
Except when we buried ourselves to the ground.

And life became unfair
After we stubbornly declared
Our innermost wars found in solace
To which we lost, to which we were impaled

But I dream of loving you
No matter what you've become
Oh life, when we see through visions' faith
We can see our world is perfectly gone.
Chris Balase Jun 2019
Breathe, Chris

Breathe.




This too
Shall pass
Back to zero
Chris Balase Apr 2019
It was an open interpretation
When you picked up the phone
I knew you can hear me talking
But I still felt alone

I wanted to express my emotions
In the hopes of winning you back
But your walls were fortified and strong
Unlike my broken heart, yours didn't even crack.

And time went slowly
As I verbalized my all
With tears witheld and hands clenched
I bare my heart and soul

And it took me a while to realize
A moment left to cry
For all the whys and the what ifs I've shed
Silence was your only reply...

My darling, I almost died.
Chris Balase Apr 2019
It wasn't explained
And you were left
Thinking it was all your fault
Or that you didn't measure up
To her expectation.

So you stand there amazed, aghast, alone.
As the trauma hits you slowly.
You wanted to cry, or to shout, or to do both.
Yet you remain still...
Trying to comprehend
The reality you are now forced into.
As tears gently kiss your cheeks
Down to your shrivelled lips
Mumbling sounds
Trembling chest of unbelief
As your heart wants to break out of his cage
And try to run into her arms
As she slips away

It was too much

So you end up making
Your own sense of this nonsense
And try to rationalize the gravity of this predicament.
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