We are all just
weaving in and out
of our own thoughts and reality,
trying to be happy.

I never thought I'd be an addict.
Once I tasted that fate... I saw everything after.
I was always addicted to something.
People, adrenalin, chaos.
Opiates were nothing more than an add-on. Another to the list...
Something inside me is growing...
Even though I'm more negative than ever, a part of me wants to grow and learn more than ever. I always lied to myself about being happy...but maybe I've been doing it all wrong.
Maybe I need to be angry. Maybe I need to yell and scream and get it all out of my system so I can make room for real happiness.
Maybe I'm just metaphorically throwing up all the toxins.

I have
been sober
for about
8 months.
Go me.

I may not have anything
in common with anybody,
but all have felt the same pain.
Pain may look evil...I promise,
it looks really cryptic,
but pain is only trying to guide you to a new opportunity. Natural selection.
I would have never met him if I hadn't been hurting.  I would have never moved to a nice town.

liquor gets sweeter
as the pain digs deeper
and my emotions are always
hijacking my mouth.

i'm just an innocent child
wrapped in twenty-two
years of skin and guilt,
searching for a love of a kin.

I wish my mother could
love herself
so she could could
love me,
so I could
love myself
and I could show you
how much
I love you.
But I do love you.
Unlike she loves me.