Oh fairy godmother
Where are you?
I have been waiting for you
You never show
For me
That just need someone near
Nor the girls down the road
Her once golden hair is now
As dark as mine
Wait
Wait
Is that you down the road?
What does she have I do not?
I’m still girls that need help
Just like her
But yet you skip me
Yet again
When will it be my turn to go to the ball?
Fairy godmother
Where are you?

The liquid colors
A brush that with others
A white canvas stands  
My hand move on its own
A brush now covers with color
The white canvas holds
Colors that is me
Making me safe
Hiding in the colors
That’s around me
The white is gone
And trees are surrounding me
An aqua body rushing
Next to me
The warmth from the sun
Hitting my arms and legs
That’s cover with the colors
Around me
The colors I’m hiding in
The world is back
My colors are gone
But somewhat I still
Feel like I’m hiding
From the real colors in the world
I’m still hiding colors
And I won’t come out

It’s a battle
One I'm still fighting
It’s hard
I don't want to give up
I fear
What will happen?
But I'm a warrior
Broken but unbroken
Unbroken warrior

Your face I can not see
Its slowly fading away
From my memory
The voice you talk with
Is now gone from my ears
But one thing you said
Never fades away
“When I’m gone don’t cry
Don’t frown
Or mourn me
When I’m gone
Laugh
Smile
Celebrate”
Your face I can not see
The voice I can’t hear
But I’m okay
Because your words
Will never fade away

Everything I see
I want to know what it is
People hate it
But I don’t care
I can’t help it
I’m just curious
I’m so curious
Mom always told me
‘Curiosity killed the cat’
But she don’t know that
‘Satisfaction brought it back’
Curious
So curious

It was the Sunday I can never forget
The secrets that was written and lost
Was brought back in light
Sister and I was just helping grams
The wallpaper must be replaced
But it was covering a hole
One I had no idea was there
The **** hole
And my ******* curiosity
That demanding to be heard
My hand with a mind of it's own
Reach into the darkness
Full of dust and webs
Until a notebook appear in it
Notebook after notebook
Till the pile reach my hip
As a marathon began
Swapping out one with others
The sun fall behind the horizon
When I finish
I can't believe it
What I read
But more importantly
What I saw
My sister eyes once with life
Now with death
Tears of blood running down her cheeks
The smile chilled me to my bones
Now as I became a part of
the island that our family own
I can't but hope the baby
In my sister arms
Won't become like the rest of us
On this island of bones

She cries for help
But everyone turns
No one will help
Lace is trying to hide them
But is failing so
They still show
She keeps to herself
All by herself
But share with one
No one will come
She cries for help
But lights turn off
Now blue light
Shine the room
And young life
Is now gone
No one would help
She will never cry again

The bird flew
As she walk
She asks
‘Why do you fly away?
You are no different
Then the rest
Of them
You just fly
Not run or walk away’
As she walk
The bird flew

As the fire dance
Laughter rise
The air feels light
Happiness light the room
But the world's turn
Every minute
Soon anger will follow
The laughter sink
The air feels heavy
And there no happiness
But the dancing fire
Holds the memory
Till the air blown it out

The tears of anger are
Running down my face
The fire of the feeling
Shine in my eyes
But there also a
Hint of sadness
Why is it only now?
Why couldn’t it be sooner?
Why couldn’t it happen?
Before all of this
I don’t understand
The flame of the fire
Shines even brighter than before
The tears are getting
Faster and heavier by the minute
This anger is burning brighter
And might be out of blood

I don’t know why
But right now I want
To go to the beach
And feel the cold water hit my feet
Feel the sand in between my toes,
Hear the crashing waves hitting the sand
Relaxing under the sun
Before the leaves turn
Fiery red,
Sunny gold,
The wood brown,
And the careful orange
As they fall
The kids play trying to catch
The leaves
And when the day turns to dusk
Eyes that glow on every step
Leads to a bowl of sweets
For the screaming
Trick or treat
As loud, they can shout
Laughter and happiness
Full the sky
The air around is being
Full with the smell of turkey
And apple pie
But as the trees turn bare
The snowfall
Every so graceful
There a tree in the middle
Of every family room
That Glows in the dark
Green’s and red hides
Under the tree
And stocking that hangs on
The fireplace
Are full with
Gumdrops and sugarplums
As sugarplums slowly disappear
Fireworks fill the sky
A new year has started
Yet again

As you walk away
I cry out to you
But yet you don’t stop
You don’t turn around to look at me
You keep walking
Why do you walk?
Cant you hear my tears falling
Tears that you cause
Please turn around
Face me
I need to see your face
As you walk away

Why does everyone talk?
About a way of life
With a sad tone
Should we talk?
With a happy tune
A way to remember them
The sound of their Laugh
The warmth of their smile
The comfort of their hug
The shine in their eyes
Or even the way they lived
If we talk about it happily
We are considered a ******
A ****** for remembers them
Happily
I don’t understand that
Everyone talks about a way of life
With a sad tone
It has become normal
It’s seen in a sad way
Why not a way to remember
The time we spend with them
Happily

Everything is here
But everything is being
Taking away from me
The darkness rules over me
I try to run away
To start a new
But it always found me
Everything was here
And there only one thing left
ME

My lips
Have said a lot
In the past years
Some bad that can rot something
Many sad that made people cry
Ton happy to stop those tears
Few secrets here and there
Some gossip that I shouldn’t had said
Lies that now I regret
But some I’m glad of
These rose red lips of mine
They can be a curse
But be a gift intend
My lips

I walk a street
With no light
A sign saying
Broken Dream Street
Why am I here?
I don't understand
My dream not broken
Not that I know of
But are they?
Are they broken?
I can’t tell anymore
Why can’t I tell?
Why?
Why?
I don't want to be here
On the broken dream street

When you 'whispered'
You talked
Out loud with your friends
When I sat in the desk next to you
You said
'She is lame and she should die'
I cried that night
Not a minute of sleep
And you laugh with your friends
'She looks like a ***'
And walked on
Now you’re here
Next to me at a place
Where nothing will happen like that here
You say you story
And tried to not look at me
Ten years later
You finally noticed how it feels
What you said just slap you
Back in the face

When I was younger
I couldn’t say a lot
Not because I didn’t want to
It was because I was unable to
Now there was a word
No matter how hard I tried
I couldn’t say it
But then one day I went to see him
I had my cards of words with me
I was getting frustrated with the word
So, I sneak outside
I saw the word flying around
Then my name was called
He was there behind me
And the card in his hand
He pointed at the word
That now on the flower beside him
‘what is that?’
How could I say it now?
If I couldn’t before
I tried and failed
Every day he called
And ask me to say the word
Two months later
And can finally say the word
Phone in hand calling him
‘hey grandpa guess what’
butterfly

As the snow falls
There’s a cry of sadness
Under a Christmas tree
That glow with the fireplace
She sits there looking up
With her eyes covered
By her black hair
Her cheeks are red
There black under her eyes
She’s alone again
She got everything
But the one thing she wants
Can’t even spend five minutes with her
Even on weekends
She only wants her mother
To be by her side
To notice her
To care about her
That’s all she wants
But she will never get
That one wish granted

This is my song
This is who I am
I’m not going stop singing
Till everyone hears its
This is my song
One that holds my pain
The one that the word are my darkness
That I hid inside  
Please listen to it
Because
This is my song

As the rain hits
My face
As I stand above you
Looking at the grass
That now cover you
My heart broke
I can’t tell you good news
Can’t run to you
When I’m crying
No longer able to laugh
At your jokes even when
I think its lame
I look up and saw nothing thought
You were there next to me
But you’re not
The rain hits my face
Hiding my tears

It is my life
It is my soul
It is my way of running away
It is the way to show who I am
But it has so many ways
Some that makes a river of tears from your eyes
Make your eyes change to black
Make you feel like you need to smile
Make you safe as a lock
Make you the only girl in the world
But it’s in the world
Everywhere is music

As she looks at the window
Past comes rushing past her
Feeling the past tears run down her cheeks
The words of hate that are forever in her mind
The bruises she still feels them
But the colors have been gone for years  
Threats of death whisper behind her
Can't help it
Scar for life
Some have fade
Others are contrasting to her skin
And mind
But she grins through it
She can't help the past
Returning

A girl with scars
You may not see them but they are there
A girl with kindness in her eyes
That shines in the night
I’m a girl you understand
That fake smile does not show
The black dyed hair is up
At home, they show all day you see
But those eyes that are full of kindness
Are close and full with tears
The pain shows and it hurts
You don’t understand
I’m just a girl

My eyes close as the first note fly in the air
bright light full of color ;
a big top tent of a carnival
show in my sight
apples dipped in caramel
oxidation, the air in my lungs
the feeling that i long-lost
brought back in force
as the awkward juvenile self
consume me once again
darkness show and shape into
a mask man takes my hand in his
twirling
twirling
twirling
he leads me
but a twirl turns into sprained
down to my knees from the pain
my eyes snap open
the final note leaves the air
controversy spread to
table to table
like water flooding the room
when the name of the song is called
SASSAFRAS
but as the moments past the flood
disappear to where it came from
the night may have ended peacefully
but no one mention
the strange request from the bar