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I don't want you to look me in the eyes because I can't look myself in them.
I get lost in my own searching for something but I can never find anything.  
I don't want you to get lost.
I wouldn't be able to sleep knowing that you can't find your way back.
This isn't the same boy
Everything I do with you is a blur when it's over but when we're together everything feels great.

Your smell is stuck in my nose and your image is burned into my eyes.

I remember wanting to hold your hand but not how many times I cowarded away from the idea.

I remember how many times I thought about kissing your face but I don't remember a time when I have.

These moments of clarity and these moments of fog are everything I thought they would be and maybe even a little more.

I'm not sure what we are but I like it. I like that what we are isn't a label but a feeling.

But most of all, I like you.
You're my drug.
I know you're the worst thing for me but you taste so good.
Your hair feels great between my fingers and the way your lips pull on mine makes me want to paint galaxies with my mind.
Your hands are heavy and rough but feel amazing against my skin.
Your skin is probably the best part.
It's not rough or callused, it's smooth.
It's innocent.
I know eventually that you'll **** me, the innocence in my soul, but I'm just so addicted.
You're poison and I can't stop drinking.
I never liked the rain. It was always too cold or too wet for me. But the way the word curled off of your tongue made me want more. Any word that fell from your lips really.
I watched the rain for the first time in a while. I wanted to smell it. I wanted to  touch it. I wanted to taste it. I stopped myself from doing so though.
I watched and I listened. The first and last sense you lose when your time comes.
Maybe when my time comes you'll say more words and I'll hear them fall out. Maybe there will be rain.
I wanted to hold your hand that night.
I couldn't bare to do that to you though.
I couldn't bare to hold your hand knowing you have feelings for me and knowing that I have feelings for you and knowing that I'm ******* around with your best friend.
I couldn't bare breaking your heart the way he broke mine so long ago.
I want to stop so we can be happy but I want to feel good.
I can't hold your hand because I'm not worthy.

— The End —