Are you in love with your depression?

Because I sure am with mine. My life
Is a sunny day and ice water right now.
Yet I still see clouds touching the mountains.

I wonder what brought me to jump at every crack
On the sidewalk.

So I trace my steps back and reopen every healed scar along the way,
And laugh at the lies I told myself about life being okay.

I wonder how I got here, laying next to a 6'4" beautiful giant who is in love with me,

And I wonder if I love him for him or if I love him for loving me.

I can't ruin it this time.

What do you know of life
the way I live it?

What do you know of us,
to open your mouth and talk? Like that.

What do you know about
Binds, bonds
How love goes and grows
You silly teenager, never fell in love!
You are older than I but you know not more.
You don’t know my mind, at all.
Neither his.
You make me shake. Stir up pain and doubt in me.

What do you know about life
and the aftermaths?
I read poems and you are not in them
I hear your words in no place.
What do you know about
love - that lovely disease
spreading through the body
and not your weekend flirts!
Life looks empty through these eyes.
Please interfere not with my heart.

These words cannot aspire to tell
the world contained inside my chest

What do you know about life
The way I live it?
The way we live it?
Shut up.