maybe you don't get to remember how it looked like, or sounded like.
but you'd always remember how it felt.

she has been told
her entire life
to feel but not show
be smart but not out loud

to bend and not break
be like rubber band

but darling,
even a rubber band loses it at the end

and you're not an unliving thing
so lose it, feel it
speak, shout if needed

and if you do break, take the time
to grow or heal
then bounce back
and repeat it over and over again

'cause that's the beauty
in living
as a person, your own
and not any metaphor of pretty things
can compare to what you are

cause you are indeed, not a thing
but a beautiful human being

"the thing that caused you to feel lonely
is just a current undesirable weather"

"the sky isn't blue for you at the moment,
but it will eventually,
'cause rain and the dark sky are temporary"

the world tries to convince me
that loneliness is just a season-kind-of-feeling

little do they know
it's not the weather to blame
it's that i'm blind towards the color of the sky
both blue and night, just looks the same
hence feels the same

but they don't know that
'cause they're not colorblind
meanwhile i am
and i will never know
what  a beautiful blue sky is like

they say it's the one you think of at 2 PM when you're happy
not the one at 2 AM when you're lonely

but no one has ever mentioned
about the one you keep trying to get rid from your mind
between those two opposite times
everytime you feel a little bit of both

there are some songs
that end up being tainted

'cause i tend to play one on repeat
for a certain amount of time

that when i haven't listen to it for a while
and wanna remember what it sounds like

it takes me back
to the moments of when it was played on repeat
and sometimes
those moments were not pretty
even when the song is happy

and it could be the opposite
and breaks me even harder
'cause either i know it's something beautiful
that i can no longer have

or reminds me of a someone
who once were my day and night
but no longer there

they say
you'll know how much you've grown
in terms of loving

when you let a person go
not because of what you feel
no matter how much it hurts
and how much it tortures

as long as they won't feel what you feel


"i let you go so you'll be happy
now go,
before i couldn't heal"

nothing feels worse
than looking in the mirror
and shook your head for what you see