Camila: Favorites

Sep 2013 Camila

Patrick A G Watson

I remember the night we tried and tried.
And woke up with a silvery glow because despite
our trying there was too much there for us to deny.

I remember carving ourselves into the city streets.
We were the space between the moon and the sun.

I remember ignoring the warning burns and creating sparks anyway.

I remember the sleepy songs, and how you never used to sleep.

I remember how we laughed and walked and lay and ate hot food and bit and scratched and flew and wore no clothes and ached and healed and loved.

I remember trying to imagine a world with no air.

I remember learning how to be still, and I remember how when I’m in your arms I feel at home.

Sep 2013 Camila

Dead Man Walking

Sep 2013 Camila

Mike Hauser

Dead Man Walking

Is this all that you have left
As you take these ancient steps
First the right and then the left
Counting off in you head

There's a vibration in the sound
As your feet sink into the ground
Still fighting round after round
Soon to be down for the count

Dead Man Walking

The mumbling of the local priest
The buckling of the wobbly knees
Finding it way to hard to breath
As your wants give way to your needs

Passing those the same as you
Laughing at what you're going through
One day they'll go through it too
On that day they'll be ridiculed

Dead Man Walking

As your strapped into the chair
Far off laughter from somewhere
Though it is drawing ever near
As your strapped into the chair

Warden throws the send off switch
Your entire body starts to twitch
Hands tighten into an angry fist
From the burn of Satan's kiss

*Dead Man Walking

Sep 2013 Camila

Satan's Little Darling Sin

Sep 2013 Camila

Casaria NightShade

Satan's Little Darling Sin

Me.
All of me.
Apart of something so powerful.
Although I do no t have the strength to do anything.
Not one thing.
I just fall in this cloud of black.
Covered and unseen.
It covers the only beauty in me.
I am just like glass.
It is ever so easy to shatter me.
The devil, is here and there.
But never really here.
Never right next to me.
Never lulling me to sleep.
Never kissing me with his sharp teeth.
He calls me his Darling Sin
But I do not believe it, not a chance.
I do not want to be his Darling Sin.

Meh.

Sep 2013 Camila

It's all so wrong

Sep 2013 Camila

M

It's all so wrong

Maybe my mistake
Wasn't keeping everything inside
Maybe it wasn't sleeping all day
   or drinking by night
Maybe it wasn't caused by the blade
   or the puking or the 85 pills

I think it was the "I love yous" that became
   said (and heard) too often
Simply because people were told that they
   needed to make up for the first 16 years
I think it was the heart-to-hearts often taking
   place at 2am
And being taught to have faith in others
I think it was the hugs that were the worst
   since they were given so that they would no longer
   feel foreign as they once had

For I am not supposed to be as  fragile as I
   was reshaped to be
I am not supposed to be filled with false
   hope or urgent voices saying "it gets better"
Pain isn't always temporary
Although joy often is
Maybe if I had been enlightened with these truths
   instead of taught ignorance through those lies
Then things would be different

(But my only fear
is would they?)

Sep 2013 Camila

Forgive Me Nots

Sep 2013 Camila

Alison Satine

Forgive Me Nots

it's not you
it's not you
i'm not sorry.
cotton candy kisses
valentine candies
forgive me not
poison chocolates
forget me not
this bloodlust is driving me crazy
maybe I'll be a ****** baby
velvet and blood
and creamy lace and pink guts
bitter coffee and venom laced lips
and hesitant sips
nightshade tea and pills of three
flirting with death
and stealing my breath
this murderlust is driving me mad
I'm intoxicated and I'm high
I'm in love and I'm bad
belladonna coffee in threes
mentholated cigarettes and
forgive me not
'cause I'm not
oh honey, it's all regrets
it's not me
it's not me
I'm not sorry.

Sep 2013 Camila

Love Is Amazing

Sep 2013 Camila

Javiola Ramirez

Love Is Amazing

Love comes but never leaves,
You win and you lose,
It's just the way it goes.
You find and you throw,
It Breaks as it heals,
It's just the way it makes you feel.
It cures your broken heart,
Just as it eats your manly pride,
You fly to heaven or ride in hell,
You watch as you win or cry as you fail.
It's just how it makes its ways.
One day you're happy,
Others you're sad,
Some days you're proud,
While others your down.
Love comes when you least expect it,
Not when you want it.
It makes your heart beat
with its powerful heat.
It ties you in a circle
It makes you go round and round.
It's a cycle
You'll never be loose
It's a trap that you'll never unwrap.
Love is Pure
Honesty
happiness
Loyalty
Trustful
Painful
Sadness
Depressing
Different
Harmful
Love Is Amazing!

Sep 2013 Camila

Green Eyes

Sep 2013 Camila

Coriander Lee

Green Eyes

She was a dream,
As lucid as the sea,
And we sat in the sand
And laughed on the wind.

And her eyes,
A serene lagoon of green.

And a kiss,
Salty like the sea ****,
That washed up on the shore,
And danced under the waves.

And she was a dream?
That girl and me,
And her green eyes by the sea.

Sep 2013 Camila

Who Am I?

Sep 2013 Camila

Carl Sandburg

Who Am I?

My head knocks against the stars.
My feet are on the hilltops.
My finger-tips are in the valleys and shores of
     universal life.
Down in the sounding foam of primal things I
     reach my hands and play with pebbles of
     destiny.
I have been to hell and back many times.
I know all about heaven, for I have talked with God.
I dabble in the blood and guts of the terrible.
I know the passionate seizure of beauty
And the marvelous rebellion of man at all signs
     reading "Keep Off."

My name is Truth and I am the most elusive captive
     in the universe.

Sep 2013 Camila

That Night

Sep 2013 Camila

Mercy B

That Night

I remember looking into your eyes and realizing how I was now responsible for this beautiful little life, thirteen years later our connection is so much stronger, as cliche as it may sound.

Your are truly my rae of sunshine, no matter how dark my life can be with out a doubt  it most definitely starts to lighten up the moment that you come around.

I've memorized your smile and each and every little freckle on  your sweet face and only you truly know when i need my space and when to snuggle up close cuz i need you to stay.

I just could not shake the uneasy feeling lingering in  my mind, I now wish that i had listened to my hearts warning for it must have sensed the tragic events that were still to come that  day.

Startled and confused I am awaken from a deep sleep by a sound that starts off a million miles away and steadily grows, a lump caught in my throat as  answered the phone.

His voice angrily shouts commands but all I hear the panicked cries from her, Mommy I'm so sorry I should not have taken them, Mommy I need you, Daddy stop screaming at me just leave me alone.

My mind turning completely numb I am not sure but some how I reacted: What hospital, When and what did she take and if you do not to screaming at her I warned, my adrenaline rushing as we flew out the door.

An hours drive stood between me and my sweet little Sunshine - Rae, I almost lost my baby by her own hand, my mind kept replaying her walking out the door for the weekend, as she turned from the car door with her scrunched up lil nose and said " No Momma I love you more"

It took me a while to even say out loud what happened that night.
Two weeks ago my baby girl was driven to her breaking point and thought it would just be better not to be at all.
I wish I could take on all of her pain and sadness because I would gladly do it without hesitation.
Thank the lord that she was found early enough and is now talking to someone.
I have explained very elaborately to her father that her emotions are just as real, intense and important as any one else's and should not be ignored.
We seem to have a difference of opinions when it comes to listening to our child.
But ther biggest difference may be I will defend, protect and stand behind my girl against whom ever wants give her grief I don't care who even him..