we were gum toothed kids
popping stones onto trickling tarmac
black and boiling tar

and kissing our nail beds
and biting our tongues
pure puckered flesh and blistering blood

hoarse from our philanthropic noise
antagonists
flashing shouts and rolling loud

my dear lonesome wildfire
with a soul of salt and thunder
eat this youth alive

When I saw you on the beach
chest puffed and shoulders wide
like a soldier, booming
and fighting off the tide
I was screaming with a vigour
I need you by my side
salt stained and blue eyed

skin as clean as the ocean
salt water in your blood
bones would settle sweetly
among the singing sands

she would shatter like
a blue tile
that adorns mother's kitchen
looking over the sea

we watch the whales come in at dawn
and as the dusk draws near
the sailboats heave in with nets
shaking heavy with the flashing fish

and brown, wrinkled fishermen
who cut fast into the ****** fish with their knives
slaves to the sea
and sons of the tides

in my subconscious
i wish i could destroy

the way my skin bunches like you’re the cold
under your touch too hard
my flesh an anchor to solitude
how my eyes ache
my lips quiver when i see you
you say my body wants you
but all of it wants to be alone

she casts
the lasso up
to the snarling
skies and ensnare it
with the burning rope
it's back breaks in
the wind
like a torn sail

it tangles
in the lunar cavity
descends effervescent stars
like honey dripping
down a string
into hidden
alcoves of the golden
cathedral

here, my love
see my arms heave
the bruises
that adorn me
like the jewels of
an african king
i have brought you
the moon

would you drink that Lethe water my dear?
If I was to place it in a crystal vessel
adorn it with diamonds brighter than your eyes

Would you let her serene whispers into your tumultuous mind?
to ease your psyche and cleanse you?

she tastes like flowers grown upon the highest cloud
honey to the palate
does that tempt you my dear?

She is not styx nor cocytus
she is a scintillating blue
you will die, I admit
but she’ll borne you anew

On the lavender sheets
we sat under wood carvings
behind taut-curtained windows
the white paint slightly smeared on the glass
next to a bowl of orange hard candies
sipping the hot,
sugarless earl grey
bitter as the cold
and fell in love

hands, cheeks, chin, nose
pressed yellow against the
warm glass
the sun has no obstacles
but the effervescence
of the bubbling mirage
cast in the grass
near the reflection
of your blushing toes

to mix colors first
the possibility of taking what i know
and obliterating it
for a holocene
a vibrant tabula rasa
forged by my gooey green and yellow fingers
a manifestation in blue

hold me
orpheus with pale skin
atop the white cliffs
where the foaming waves break
and ghosts cry
beneath the torpid sea

with some subtle illumination
i fell in love
with your blue,
raging, roaring, raw
under your skin
ravishing your soul
you didn't have an aura
you had an atmosphere
stirring the air around you
into hurricanes

and the freckle under your right eye
i fell in love with that too

felt like the sound
the sound of my head
smacking against the concrete

i would cry you a song
through my loose voice
and broken tone
but i cannot sing
so with a rather unromantic keyboard
stained with ink and post-it glue
i type my feeble poems
to embark along the lonely universe
unheard by caring ears
emotionless fonts
and indifferent words

it felt like thousands
of red blizzards
were fighting in my throat
and you had replaced my eyes
with ice cubes.

we went down
with our cold steel tempests
swollen lips screaming
out aggressive effervescence
watching the tide
break the backs of those tendrils
gripping onto the coral heads
and twist them in the dark blue

lies in raving lips
and peerless eyes
In the very temple of delight
delirium takes her prize
hysteria kissing her foaming teeth
psychosis fills her sighs
asinity nestles deep
from warmth between her thighs
and leaving her is lucidness
filling final sounds with lies

did you notice
the way my skin bunched like you were the cold
under your touch too hard
my flesh an anchor to solitude
how my eyes ached
my lips still quiver when i see you
you say my body wants you
but all of it wants to be alone

the ache parts
you come cold
as sleep and freezing kisses
still close
i have this every sometimes
filling me
suspiratio

he took his boy
down to the water
alone in that salty
white sun
and sat on the washed- up concrete
touching the sand
before bicycles and old ladies
with their flowery dresses and their
tinkling bangles
and wide swaying hips selling
their mangoes from a cardboard sign
and the boy went into the water
blackening his shorts
ribs tight beneath his ebony hide
and ran up against the shore
casting his arm like a shakespearean
bitten fingernails cupping
as his brown hands and scored fingers
dripped with the sharp *** of seaweed
he had brought for his father
with nothing else to do
on the monday afternoon

wind beats on the glass
and it shatters my soul
to see in the rain
that with her, you are whole

infant in the sea
paled by the raging white surf
his belly swells with foam, stretched
and his cobalt tongue lolls
like the short haired dogs
on the haitian coast
he has kissed the sands of the deep
with his vapid cheeks
salt encrusts his veins
still running wet
with neptune's tears
he
floats,
cold
beneath the waning of artemis
he is bearded by a mother's grief
who has lost her
infant in the sea

sometimes the dove
stands too heavy on the bar
and it shatters
grains falling to the ground
like fast and precious raindrops
to tempt the rats
on the ****-stained earth

was happiness
in every broken way

cast a spell
from somber pluto
ensnare my heart with
orpheus' lullaby
and drown me
in lethe's
black sea

creator's close
and open, blossoming
each petal chose
enclosed
a glistening cathedral expose
the red repose
i dream of the rose

My dress clinging to my goosebumps
like cold rain on the mountains
as you took my hand,
and said
"let's go jump off the dock"
even though it was late at night
and I was scared of the sharks
and at the end of all of it...
i'm trying so hard to forget you

to have something to look forward to
because our aspirations,
however small (I want to watch TV later)
are our guides

your acrid absence
descends on me like flies to the ferment
fresh, fertile, and fevered gore
as the boiling blood as carthage was *****
and the pillage of gaea
at the primordial age
i pray
i yearn for
the subdued sufferings of atlas
or prometheus, for those smile
so plainly
against your acrid absence

i
listened to 4 morant
on repeat
not
letting the xannies
hit the bottom
before i took some more
and facetimed
my friends
laughing
lets sneak out
graze our knees
on the griptape
of our new skateboards
and the tarmac
its 2 am
im coming
stand under the window
to my bedroom
second floor
laughing
and catch me
when i try to get down
ready?
im nervous
------------------------------



-----------------------­----------            oh no

---------------
----                  i let go



-------------------         ****

SMACK                                               the worst pain i've ever felt


no this wasn't supposed to happen


-------------------------

-----------                  ­           i landed on the tiles i feel broken


----------------


my back hurts
somethings wrong
****
-                                                        blood everywhere
-
-
****
-
-                                  i thought i was a god
-
i broke it
-
-                                                           i can't feel my arm
-
my back's broken where are my friends
-                                                        ­                       they were never here
**** help help help
they can't hear me
-
-
mum? dad? they'll be so mad
-
-                                                         what do i do
what if i die
what if i never walk again
----

its blurry
call an ambulance
-----                        you're not supposed to move

WHY CAN'T THEY HEAR ME

more than anything
i want to study
the gentle intonation of your voice
the soft shapes
of your skin
the scents
and feeling of your hair
infallibly
i want to know you

Biting the skin of your nails until they bleed
And pulling out your eyelashes
until your eyelids bruise
and washing your hands until they crack
and failing, should anything be below 100%

can't i just be good enough?
because good is none of these things.

let's go surfing
gather the fading
remnants of our youth
there's a hurricane coming in
the grey waves are roused
pounded by the rain
the heron
with its white and jagged breast
and the three legged dog
laying in the dripping bushes
are calling you
to bear witness

every inch of your skin
will be stained with my kisses
and burned by my tears

we walk at night
beneath bright lights
drenched in dark sweat
and smoke falling from our lips
like reckless words
heels aching and black
we bow from the labors
of the day
and the heat
of the night

fingernails blackened from scraping in the moss
a soul of blood, dirt, grit and change,
tendrils of Fibonacci, curving ivy in our jewel-veins
lips that have been bitten and blow among reeds
deep in the forest where our feet touch the riverbed
and our heart thunders like the rain.

he is as blue as the rising crescent
warm as the phantoms marine
and cold as the rain, dripping over
my cupids bow i am refreshed

he is
mine

engravement
depravement
don't roast my parents on a spit :)

you do just that
you prize apart the mattress springs of my throat
slivering hands
greedily tear and I bleed
coughing up the red words you told them I spoke
and in my own bones
you find me a prison

to trust
to fall in love
without the distractions
of subtle signs
you want to leave
me behind

The dust from the sahara
golden as caramel
sugar burnt from the sun and
glazed by the shadow of temples and
jewels and camel's hooves
is in the sky
and the sky is grey here
and my lips are dry

do you think we could
sit in the dewy grass
on your mothers knitted blanket
like we did three
summers ago
with coffee on our tastebuds
and ice between our teeth
because
i would like to have taken a picture
of you in that green shirt
against the blue
of the sky

you taught me what it means
to be human

take each word down
place them
precariously and scribble
force them into eyes and minds
all around you
these words
cannot be forgotten
or you will be
forgotten
and you will be lost
all meaning will be lost
at the sound
of the approaching
rain

I never write when I'm happy,
rather, to peel the scabs off healing scars
sculpt the pain into calibri and bold
paste my black skin onto the white screen
and wait
for the views to roll in
which i use as validation,
and bandage myself up again