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Mar 2017 · 562
will you take me back
lotus lord Mar 2017
i was worried and scared
so i left

but no matter how many steps i take forward
i'm always looking back

are love wasn't fake
it was as pure

maybe that's why i can't find it again

i miss you, i curl up in your clothes, i pretend your here
i still love you
i want you back, but will you take me back?
7 months ago i left a man i fell in love with i wanted him to relieze what was happening but i regret it now we want each other but how i left things im scared it will hurt us
Sep 2016 · 249
Most mornings
lotus lord Sep 2016
I wake up hopping today will be better then the last
But a hope is just a hope
Sep 2016 · 280
love
lotus lord Sep 2016
love

its a two way street
or more like playing frogger

you give, you take
but most of the time you just feel like it was just you

you fall hard
and you get your heart broken
May 2016 · 219
i'm not over you
lotus lord May 2016
i say i'm over you

that now your just my best friend
i stay up in the night talking to you

i think about the good times we had

but when i find your dating someone
i cry because i'm hurting
i'm missing you more then ever

and then i see

i'm not over you
Apr 2016 · 241
i am human
lotus lord Apr 2016
i am human

i make mistakes
i do thinks that maybe i shouldn't do

i protect my friends when you have pushed them down
i am there backup when they need help

i'm kind and sweet
but when you do me wrong
i cut you out of my life

i weird but fun
i'm a out going person

i wont judge you if i don't know you
so why judge me when you nothing about me
Apr 2016 · 472
my monster
lotus lord Apr 2016
i hear a sound
i pull my blank over my head
i think to myself the monsters will get me

then mother walks in with a light
she shows me there's nothing there

its all in my head

7 years later

i sit in the back of the classroom
i pull my hoodie over my head
i sit in silents

kids through things at me
calls me names
push me around

and i think to myself
were's mother when i need her to scare away the monsters
Apr 2016 · 357
were growing apart
lotus lord Apr 2016
i'm sorry i cant be who you want me to be
i'm sorry i cant please you

are paths have started to split

you go one way                                                   i go the other

the me you once know has grown older
i started to be come the person i wanted to be

we were once good friends
but now your getting mad and yelling at me

we are taking are different paths

live your life the way you want to
and slowly ill become ghost
Apr 2016 · 2.1k
the outcast
lotus lord Apr 2016
the outcast group is the one no one wants to be in

but to be honest its the funnest group there is

you have people of all different personalities
so many people with many different lives
so many people with stories to be told

the outcast group

were the weirdest
were loud
were crazy

but were the one group that's not scared to be us

we are the outcast group
Apr 2016 · 162
what is love
lotus lord Apr 2016
is it a feeling when you've know someone for so long?

is it the way i feel when im around my parenter?

is it something i say to someone when i want them to know i care?

is it a feeling the just come when it does?

if no one knows what love is then why do we have so many questions on it?
Apr 2016 · 236
im just bored
lotus lord Apr 2016
i play on factions
timelesspvp on op faction

im making a group as a all girls faction  

but because i have a name as underworldlord
they think im a pervert

all i want is to met girls my age
and like the things i like
Apr 2016 · 250
underdog
lotus lord Apr 2016
i'm different

you pick me out
you'll bully me till the end of school

i'm told
go see someone when your bullied, talk about how you feel

but they still wont do a thing
they hit them on the hand and say
don't do it again

it stops for what
a week

then they come after me again

it's when i stand up for myself and finally fight back

that then i'm a bully in everyone's eyes
i get in trouble, i get labeled as a bully

by why
because i do want you tell me to do?
because i stand up for myself?
or is it because im a underdog and i stand for whats right?
Apr 2016 · 189
what happens next
lotus lord Apr 2016
(crack)
(rip)
(crash)

there's the sound once more

my heart breaking
falling to the floor

but as it's falling
i heart a silent scream

its your name

after it crashes and shatters
i look down

i see the string and the scars

the scars from when you broke it before
and the string from when you put it back together

but who's going to put it back together

because you've left me all alone
Apr 2016 · 499
youtube
lotus lord Apr 2016
I watch you everyday

From random videos to watching YouTube's

You give people hobbies and jobs

You give the a chance to creative and show the world who they are

Sometimes to question runs though my mind
Do I have what it takes to be a youtuber to

I just push it aside and continue watching
Apr 2016 · 163
over and over again
lotus lord Apr 2016
i wake up
but i dont want to get up

i get dressed
but i want to stay in my pj's

i go to school
but i want to stay home

i go home
i wonder what i going to do next

i hang in my room
being meself

i go to sleep

wondering

what i could have done better
what could i have done different

but i fall asleep thinking i need to do better
when i really know what i did is what im going to do tomorrow
Apr 2016 · 2.7k
gamer
lotus lord Apr 2016
i'm a gamer
i live in the same world as you

play almost everyday
it's my get away

i met new friends everyday
i help you
you help me

just because i'm a gamer
doesnt mean i dont life like you
Dec 2015 · 421
haven't you done enough
lotus lord Dec 2015
we call and you never pick up

you know im 17 year old
and yet you act like im 5

you make it seem like your the victim
but i see what you do, im not stupid

you tell me you'll never been sent a picture of me
but i know mom sends one every year

you tell me your using new paper as ****** paper
yet you drink and smoke

nana when will you learn that its not all about you
haven't you done enough
Nov 2015 · 400
my heart brakes
lotus lord Nov 2015
its been a long time since i saw you
its been a longer time since we dated

i still look at you with all the love i still have for you
but know it can not be

i look away with sarrow in my eyes

but as turn away

i hear your voice cut through the silents and say
remember are plan

i turn around with shock and disbelief in my eyes
just to see you smiling

later that day you come to have lunch with me

and just before you walk out that door
you give me a kiss
and smile
Nov 2015 · 217
why
lotus lord Nov 2015
why
deep down i still love you

but i know i can not show it

you try to make me jealous
you tell me you have another

and yet you say
i love you
lotus lord Nov 2015
the world is mine to see it as i please

for i was not born just for my parents to have a child

but i was born to tell my story

when i was little i would look at this world and think
its so pure

this world spins completely around in 24 hours

this world spins completely around the sun in 365 days

and yet 9 years later it only felt like 1

i learnd that this world is far from being pure

it juges you
watches your every move

its a cruel, heartless and greedy place

were told be yourself
be different

but most importly were told dont change for anyone

my did i learn that's all a lie

you act like yourself and you get chewed up and are spit out

the smallest things are life changing

that little girl with golden hair
her front teeth missing cause the tooth fairy came the night before

she looks up to me with her blues eyes sparkling
and a smile on her face and tells me

don't look down
look up

don't be sad be glad

be the princess in your kingdom

never lose hope

never forget who your suppose to be

as i think to myself i say

this little girl knows more kindness
then most people know in one finger

but i was stopped in my thoughts

for this little girl pulled a simple little purple crown

i know its not much but i made it for you

i have to go but remember stay yourself

from that moment on i know not only know that this world is a cruel place

but this world has people that are kind and caring

and keep this world pure in there own eyes

they had a story to be told

at that moment i know at that
i was going to change lives

simply giving a gift
or tell someone i appreciate you
can make a difference in this world
i have been given a assignment to do a spoken word poem and this is what i wrote
Nov 2015 · 266
ying and yang
lotus lord Nov 2015
you can stop and look at anything you want

but its not always going to be beauty

the world works in different ways

but it always works with ying and yang

people in this world want world peace

but there's that ying and yang again

you can have all the world peace
but there will always be war

this is reason why you can look at anything
but its not always going to be beauty
Oct 2015 · 177
there is no normal
lotus lord Oct 2015
no one can be normal

because everyone is different
Oct 2015 · 263
im missing you
lotus lord Oct 2015
it been 6 months since ive seen you

i miss you so much
i still care for you

your still my best friend
and sister

i day doesn't go by that im thinking if you

we were the best of friends
and we helped each get through
nothing broke us apart

your parents hated me  
but mine loved you

you have were in my dream last night
i woke up crying

i felt you in my arms
i heard your voice
and now your gone again

i miss you so much alyssa

i just want you back
i need you back
Oct 2015 · 150
dreams
lotus lord Oct 2015
its funny

in one dream you wake up
and your glad

and others you wake up
wishing it was real

they can show you
what your scared of
what you want most
what makes you happy
and so on

but in all reality
its just your mind showing you want
i had a powerful dream last night i thought it had been real i woke to soon and reality hit me and i cried because i wanted it to be real
lotus lord Sep 2015
if you need i will stay
if you want me i will stay
if you care about me i will stay

when you don't need me i will leave
when you through me to the side i will leave
when you don't care i will leave

i will stay when i am needed
but once you stop needing me i will leave
Sep 2015 · 255
to each is own
lotus lord Sep 2015
no one is the same
everyone is different

I like one color and you like another

I have my own style
you have your own style

I act different than you
you act different than me

i love my friends
you don't like my friends

everyone is different
it is so each is own
this is how i feel in the place i live, everyone is different and this was a way i could put it
Sep 2015 · 247
no one believes
lotus lord Sep 2015
no one believes anymore

as were little
we believe in santa, the tooth fairy, and a lot of others

but now no one believes
either parents tell them to soon
or other kids destroy it

no one believes anymore
theres no joy for the little ones
they cant even believe in there dreams

its sad to it
Sep 2015 · 575
true friends
lotus lord Sep 2015
true friends have your back
and will help you without being asked

will pick you up when your down
there a person you can talk to
you can be your self and not worry
someone who you can cry in front off

most people think all there friends
are best friends

but when push come to shove
only a few will be true best friends
Sep 2015 · 536
we get pushed to hard
lotus lord Sep 2015
I get some kids need to get pushed to get good grades
or do to better in life

but they pushing us in the 6th grade for collage
a freshman in high school is made to choice a career

a senior in high school has to do a project on there career
and if they don't do it
they cant graduate

some kids are different then others
and its not normal to do this to kids

sometimes we get pushed to hard
Sep 2015 · 170
a question for the world
lotus lord Sep 2015
who old are you
when you don't know your age
my teacher asked the class this and it got me thinking so I would like you to think about it to
Sep 2015 · 254
stop and look
lotus lord Sep 2015
It seems as if its harder to find nice people

Are parents try to make us good
But it seems as if the world changes us more

No one stops to help
make someone's day
Or to even share a smile

In today's day and age

Its like who can be meaner
Who can make people feel small
who can be more cruel

it seem as if you have to be mean to make it
but what ever happened to being nice?
Sep 2015 · 225
i miss you
lotus lord Sep 2015
I miss my best friend
I miss my sister

yet you are not here

I need to have you to laugh
to cry when it gets to much

I need to know your ok
to know your safe

yet I cant be there

I need you so bad
I think of you all the time
I miss you
my best friend is the world to me... to be honest I would give up twitch for her because she means so much...I miss you alyssa
Sep 2015 · 193
it gets to much
lotus lord Sep 2015
it gets to much

im made a mistake and I said I was sorry
but it doesn't mean you hve the right to attack me

I love someone so much
but yet I have to let you go
time and time again

I know the truth and I want people to know
yet you tell everyone im lieing
and tell me you punch me if I don't shut up

it gets to much and ill cry
but I still get made fun of because you don't know

it gets to much
this has been my morning 3 different people 3 different promblems... im about to just cry even more then I already am
Aug 2015 · 413
can i see you again
lotus lord Aug 2015
I miss you so much
and what to talk with you

I want to hang out
want to be able to hug you

we have are ups and down
but we still remain close

can I see you again
I miss you to much
Aug 2015 · 287
school time
lotus lord Aug 2015
a time we do not look forward to
we wait till that last year to finally be free

but there is one thing we do want
to see are friends

you never relieze just how much they mean
until now when you see them again

you want to talk but cant
have to get to class

you have to deal with all that homework
and class work

and once again you look at the clock
to see hen will it end
Jun 2015 · 309
Cause im a girl
lotus lord Jun 2015
Im just a girl
With friends how happen to be boys

I don't see my friends
But once a year

You my a have a problem
That I'm a girl
And your son is a boy

But where old enough to know better

So don't be a controlling moster on your son
And don't blame me when you can't find him

And we won't have a problem
I have friend name Alex Chris and jake. I see them once a year at camp but yet Alex's mom doesn't like me and always thinks Alex is with me she ties her son up so much then blames me when he breaks free were all over 16 but I'm being told to stay away cause he's a boy and he can't control him self why can they just stop were just friends
Jun 2015 · 400
i will miss you
lotus lord Jun 2015
today came way to soon

and i wish i had time

we put you out of your pain
but now we are in pain

you will be missed boo
and i promise to see you every day
you will be in the back yard
this is for my cat boo i know ive been wrighting about her a lot but i got to spend the weekend with her she has cancer and it hard my parent put her to rest today so she wouldnt be in pain and i love her and will miss her
Jun 2015 · 341
Boo
lotus lord Jun 2015
Boo
Before she was moody
Any day I would take you in again
Big body and small head
Young

Before she looked like a turkey
Only under the shed
Only dad could train her
Baby boo is my cat boo in two days I have to put her down.  She's only 8 years old and we found her under the shed.  She was fat and when she would lay down she looked like a turkey.  My dad is not the one to really cry or be like that and marine and yet that was his cat he was the only one to pick her up and train her.  She has cancer and it hard
Jun 2015 · 358
Cancer
lotus lord Jun 2015
You take many lives way to soon

And you cause so much pain

You cause people to be sad and cry

You would think
With how much money has been put
To find a way to get rid of it
It would be gone
I just want it gone
Jun 2015 · 456
Baby boo
lotus lord Jun 2015
Baby boo
Why do you have to go

You are a sweat cat
I dont want you to go
You are so young

But you dont even know
What's going on

You are a very special cat
And I'm glad I gave you home

If I could I would take the cancer

But when you do go please
Tell you brother pumpkin
I said hi and that I love him
At least you'll be together again
I just found out my cat boo has cancer we found her under the shed she was just a kitten then we didn't know were she came but a big storm came and my dad brought her in she became are cat she is the sweetest thing you lay down and with your approval she'll lay down next to you or sit in your lap I dont want her to go I just lost her older bother there not from the same mother but have been raised together but he died 7 months ago I can't loss another we will be putting her down in a week because that's really all she has left I love you baby boo
Jun 2015 · 208
younger me
lotus lord Jun 2015
this is to younger me

most people would write
don't do this
go do that

but i'm not going to

you have a wonderful life ahead of you
you'll have hard times and you'll have good ones
just keep doing what your doing

you'll be glad you did
Jun 2015 · 309
Friday
lotus lord Jun 2015
hey its Friday

don't worry anymore
its time to party and have a good time

go hang with your friends
go online and game
go sleep
or do what ever you want

its Friday
so go have fun
Jun 2015 · 185
last day
lotus lord Jun 2015
the school year is coming to end
i have to say good bye to all my  friend
there will be tears

some that i know ill never see again
and some that i know i have had a great time with

the end is near
and i know they have changed my life
and i hope i have changed theres

its off to a new school that no one wants to go
i did fight all that i could
and parents did to but that never changed a mind

so now my last day is coming soon
and i dont want to let go
i dont want to cry

but i do want  to change there lives

i hope my last day goes well
and for all my friend i love you with all my heart
this will be a sad day in a week i dont want alyssa nor twitch to go they are the  one who i will cry all night about for i want them in my life and want them by my side
Jun 2015 · 291
why cant she stay away
lotus lord Jun 2015
time was so nice without her here

she was  pain to have around
and no one really  wanted her around
we only did it to be nice
but she never did get the hints

the day she was gone was so happy to me
and soon every day she was gone
things were as i wished what i wanted

come to find out she was locked up
and out away happy day for me

but then she has come back around
and the same old me being nice
and her being me  to me
has come back once more
six more days and  i would have been in heaven
this girl is a puppy dog to my friend and she wont get the hint that he dont like her like that anymore this girl would walk a mile and back  just to fallow him around for 4 minutes ive tried to be there for her and to be a friend but she just wont stop being mean to me 6 days till the end of school is it to much to ask well yes it been nice with out her
Jun 2015 · 301
hurry up
lotus lord Jun 2015
the bell will ring soon
and i just want to get out

you take up 7 hours of my day
when i could be hanging with friends
or doing other things

you bring me new people to meet
but yet you bring me bullies and drama

can the bell hurry up so i can just get out of here
Jun 2015 · 200
it will always be ok
lotus lord Jun 2015
this is something i say to my best friend

things may seem that there after you
that the world hate you
that everyone is against you

but its not like this
you are given these hard time
to make you stronger

yes you'll see who your real friends are
but you'll become stronger
its only there to help you

so it will always be ok
Jun 2015 · 187
i don't know
lotus lord Jun 2015
i just feel useless
that i'm nothing
and that if i fell of the planet it would be better

do i care to much
do i really mean a thing
would it even matter if i'm gone the next day

i'm sorry for all i've done
i didn't mean for it to be like this
Jun 2015 · 274
your always there
lotus lord Jun 2015
i try to be there for you when i can
but sometimes it seems as if it not enough

you've always been there when i needed you
it may not seem it

but knowing you care
makes it a hole lot better

it makes me know know your there with me

you may not be there when i'm down
you may not be there when i need someone
you may not be there when i need a hug
you may not be there when i just need a friend

but ill always know your there in my mind
Jun 2015 · 204
why cant people talk to me
lotus lord Jun 2015
why cant people come talk to me

you go behind my back
and do something that will hurt me later on

you never come to me and ask to talk
never once

if people came to me and sat me down
told me whats going on

there wouldn't be hurt
wouldn't be drama

i would be better than i am now

but yet you still go behind my back
why

why cant people talk to me
Jun 2015 · 304
This is my life
lotus lord Jun 2015
I like different things than you

I have different friends than you

I dont want to be popular like you

So dont pick on me

Dont laugh at me

Because I am me
And you can't change it

This is my life
And I'll do as I please
Jun 2015 · 296
Time and time again
lotus lord Jun 2015
Time and time again I'll tell you to leave me alone
But you just stay there

Time and time again I tell you to stop picking on me
But you just keep at

Time and time again I say something to you
But you won't listen

I'm tried of asking time and time again
Because now I'm not going to ask time and time again
I'm going to take care of it the first time
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