Caitlin

Caitlin Nov 2016

Always

I want to say something loud and clear tonight.
I am me.
I am Caitlin Moody.
Born and raised Floridian,
Singer, French Horn player
Poet.
Roommate, Friend.
I often care too much,
I love too much.
I get hurt,
I fall.
But see the thing is,
I always get up.
Always.

Caitlin Nov 2016

Home

22 hours.
That's how far away I am from home.
I was ****** into a whole new environment,
Half the time, I'm freezing.
and the other half,
I swear Michigan is winning over my heart.

And that's ok.

Caitlin Nov 2016

You don't.

You don't see how you've hurt me.
You don't see my pain.
You don't see why I'm so afraid,
Afraid of you, afraid of talking to you.
You don't see your mistake.
You don't see your failure.
You don't see anyone but yourself, do you?

I hate this feeling.
Of worthlessness
Of pity
Of "I told you so"
Of being used.

Especially when it's from you.

Caitlin Nov 2016

I can't trust myself anymore.

I can't trust myself when I'm alone anymore.
The silence is almost dreading.
I can't breath properly anymore.
The will isn't there.
I can't think straight anymore.
The thoughts are so jumbled, so tangled.
I can't anymore.
This has to stop.

Caitlin Nov 2016

I hate this feeling

The funny thing is,
You don't know what you did to make me react this way.
And I don't know how to tell you.

How can I tell you that my heart throbs when I look at you?
That the physical pain of avoiding you, even though it was your idea, Hurts so much I can't stand it.
How can I tell you, that I'm afraid of losing you?
That I'm afraid of being used by you, and then just thrown away...

I can't tell you that.
Ever

Caitlin Nov 2016

Laughter

I love to laugh,
I will laugh at my best friends face,
jokes, someone else's laugh,
I laugh at inside jokes,
even ones that happened months ago.

For me, laughter is the best medicine.
If I'm down, or haven't laughed in a while,
You know something is wrong.

Caitlin Nov 2016

You Try Too Hard.

My dear,
You try too hard
You are constantly looking for the approval of others,
when all you need is your own approval.

My dear,
You work too hard
You constantly feel like you have to stay busy,
in order to live.
Relaxing won' hurt.

My dear,
You are so blind
You are so concerned by what's ahead
That you don't see what is standing right in front of you.

My dear,
if only you saw yourself though my eyes,
and you stopped trying so hard
for things that aren't worth it.