I am an open book for you to read
Just take a look at the pictures if you like
It's much too boring for you now
You've seen it a thousand times over
Occasionally I alter the colours
But it makes no difference
I want to tell a new story
To watch the light glisten in your eyes
Just one last time.

After the storm
          After all has been
              broken, bruised, beaten and
                                            burnt to the core

The fire leaves the ashes,  the dust,
                                the desire and must to
                                               cling and hold on to
                                                           what was before

But after the storm
          And after all has been
                   broken, bruised, beaten and
                                                             ­    burnt -

I still need you
          And you still need me.

Erase
erase
erase
The feel of your fingertips,
that
f
o
n
d
l
e
with my soul and leave
little post-it notes
that stick to my cheeks,
creating tears that are
                  burning
                and
          spilling
      down
  like hot lava,
that leave me only worrying over
whether the bed sheets
will catch fire,

before you return.

It is late
Too late already
But time can spare us
A few more moments
For intricate movements
That prance from your fingertips.
We evaporate into
The candlelight that captures
The closeness of our carved space
Before we chisel through
What must be undone.

The present tides of time
wash ashore the textures of
the slender spirit of happiness
that run through every
sand grain of my soul
Leaving a feeling
only art could create
in the form of a smile

Projection of my heart from
your eyes is like the pitter
patter of raindrops that
catapult themselves against the
window, splattering my soul into
slumber for the sky to replace
me with something you desire.

Words
soar
on your breath like
maple seeds dancing
along the wind
and land on my lips
touching softly for seconds
as delicately as a butterfly's wing,
my breath sacrificed to capture
fleeting moments,
soul swooning under your
words like
they are parachutes,
latching on to every inch given

As if,
they are all for me.

Love me,
like never before.

Hold me in your arms as if i'm yours,
feel the warmth of my breath seep into your skin.
Let us burn a composition from abounding desires
and feed it something,
                                   like love.

If only for a day,
let us live in the moment,
before the future seizes it all as memories
that we play as recordings in our minds.
Wondering.

I need to know how it feels
to be uncontrollably loved
by you,

   for nothing,

          nothing

                 would
                        possibly
­                                    feel
                        ­                   more
                                                 utterly
                                                                ­ beautiful.

Clutching the very thing that destroys you
Pouring your soul down the gutter
Illusions fester upon your heart
As alcohol speaks its own language
Bottles upon bottles shattering our smiles
As glassy splints muffle our beckoning cries
If only your flesh were more of a necessity
Not the fading tales of branded cider.
I could not tell your heart in a crowd of yesterdays
For maybe it’s you I have never known.
February 2011.

I cannot pretend
that you would fit perfectly
with my grey existence
for you,
that is, all of you,
would make everything

so
unbelievably
colourful.

Cobwebs in the corners of happiness
Absorbing my attention
Clustered droplets cling to these cheeks
Fill them with joy anew
Overdosed with sadness
Like bleeding the ink from water
We are inseparable
I am a bucket
Merely catching my own teardrops.

Dreams
Delicate personal creativity
Open the seed and you'll see her
Cocooned within herself, alone
Her dreams are kept contained
These thought bubbles may pierce reality
Repetitively smashed
Picking up the pieces gets harder
It would be easier to just leave them there.

Unspoken sentences carry the weight
of heavy syllables that
yearn to be unleashed
b
u
r
n
i
n
g
holes into pages,

Its all better
left unsaid.

The blinding truth that you hide effortlessly
The opaque mask that shields your reputation
For don’t walk the streets aimlessly
Evaluating the lines of communication
For a sponge will only soak up so much hurt
Before its contents unfold upon the sky
As your exhaust fumes cause stars to divert
Banishing dreams that you so wish to stay dry
So rate not your heartache on a league table
For numbers do not correlate with emotions
Instead give these incurable aches a label
A devotion that drives your heart into motion.

Catching the smiles that
sound those three words
from your lips in our net
made of promises and truth that
makes my heart melt away,
blunting the razorblade of thought
that another hearbeat will
one day haunt me from your finger.

Catching the smiles that
sound those three words
from your lips
in our net made
of promises and truth
that makes my heart
melt away,
blunting the razor blade
of thought that
another heartbeat
will soon enough haunt you
from my finger.

Breathe in
the sweet crisp breeze
that laces the winds
and shakes the seasons
into sunkissed leaves
that sweep the city
like confetti celebrating the
arrival of the wedding of winter
before daylight exhales
and succumbs to bathe
under the beauty of moonlight.

Hush.

Your fingerprints
                          My skin

                                     And nothing.


But it ought to feel like everything
So right, so comforting, so whole.
Just one more time.
Close my eyes,
surrender my body.
Brain is screaming so loud in my ears that I fail to notice the silence until I'm stealing back my lifeless form that has been stripped away and replaced with your record tape of 'I love you' that I pin to my shirt and leave on the chair.
For anywhere else,
is just too close.

Picture perfect memories
Whispy sweet monologues
The ounce I have left of you
In jars they were sealed
Suffocating for remembrance
You are still there, an echo
Only an echo
Like free spirits they now run
Seeping into every thought bubble
These precious jewels
An angelic mask of destruction
Erase them from my mind
Take them away
They are too heavy in my hands.

No logic can drift away
the stench of lust that
lures over us, like darkness
caressing the daylight with truth.
Whispers of memories unsilence
your song composed upon my skin but
the aching kiss of a bumble bee
melts away our distant song as
it extracts the purity of our pollen,
the longing for love that
once stirred your soul.
As it still stirs mine.

Holding you tight
won't keep you
close enough to
aid the aching from
the lingering stench
of fire smoke that stains
my skin and reminds
me of that heart
I will always be
unable to grasp.

I wish I smoked.
Fancy a cigarette to inhale something.
Anything.
To suffocate the voice I grew
that left you speechless.
Silent.
The lingering of your synchronized heartbeat on mine;
a canvas layered in pain painted oils becomes
hard to clean.

You left me in limbo.

                                           Waiting.
                                                Waiting.­
                                                     Waiting.

Until.
You're sorry.
Your touch.

And like lightening,
                            
                        ­           Forgiveness.

Sometimes,
      your eyes just
      
   unravel

   and each time,
  I feel
like
I'm right at home.

I would much rather
spend limited time
with you,
being caked in smiles
making rhymes
about starburst limes,

than limitless time,
building rhymes
with empty lines
from missing you

This soul, now unfurnished
I gave it all to you in syllables
Imprinted on my skin are these words
This cloak of vulnerability drips like sweat
For everyone can see
It’s not about analysing assembled nouns and adjectives
I wear these words, a second layer to this heart
To expose them, I expose myself
Naked and unprotected I stand
A stranger cannot reach the window into my soul
But you, like me,
Wear these words as clothing
To place as a coat back over me.

Pause feelings.
Listen to the bells of
the birds that chime to
announce the time to condition
this heart of the cold inner winter
that sprouted only bandaged tape
around my front door.
      
My dry throat cried the desire for
this lid to be removed that
sealed me in the musky air of memories.
Dehydrated, the taste of the unstained
wind of sanity satisfied my flesh and
soul from those hours told from the
tower of uninvited illusions.

The hissing of the echoes of those
lies are now buried beneath the rolling
tides that tickle me for the once
felt feeling of happiness.

Beneath it all, there you were
A silent siren, undiscovered
A perfect fit to these unfulfilled dreams
We tick as one clock,
Time muffled by your melodic pulse
The beautiful song of reality
With love comes the boulder of fear
A confession, a burden chained to these fantasies
That this heart will be left out to suffocate
Preserve this heart from destruction
These scars are too familiar with the mending process.

Let's take what we have
(memories that are like
segments of oranges, bursting
at the seams),
            piece everything together
with lines,
and
play dot to dot .-.-.-,

                   the lines that join us
                          are the
              gateways,
        boundaries
and bridges
into our world,
that keep
my
perfect pocket smiles

safe.

The most beautiful words
I haven't told
you yet
are
whispering,
melting
in your arms,

I feel their warmth against your
skin and know,
you won't let go.

Photograph of your face full of suncream
Captures the memory of that last night
Happy and smiling you tag machine
You know everything is going to be alright

The presence of your company now suddenly gone
That yellow car game, now who will win?
Your beautiful heart was here for so long
Will miss your tales about the cat and the bin!

Watched a new love for you grow inside of me
Will water this garden, I promise
Just keep your head up my little bumble Bea
And use those wings to fly from the darkness.

Take me back
to when you
were the warmth that radiated beneath my heartbeat
and raised me high like a hot air balloon

                     before we had
                    to untangle our
                            souls
        
memories,
now memories are petals i peel away
one by one,
       as i keep cutting my heart on
                  the green-ness that
                             memories are not the stories of today,
                                 we are not the stories of today.