A voracious beast devours my Husband
Distraught and upset I must put on a strong face for him
Every day I watch him grow paler and more thin
At night my dreams are consumed with needles, prescriptions
IV tubing and bad food swirl in the mix
In his eyes I see an exhausted spirit on the edge
The need to protect is a driving force within me
Hospitals should be more sterile
HE HAS A ******* FAILURE OF THE BONE MARROW PEOPLE
The next school of medicine reject who doesn't wash their hands
Will have them cheerily  burned off...by me
On the inside I seeth and cry, throw a child's tantrum on the floor
Unfair does not even begin to describe the pain he has endured
Some would say to let him go, *******
They just do not know us
For my exterior is made up of stone
Supported by a frame of steel
I will never give up
We have a will of iron
A malignancy has no control over our strength
Into the coming war of medical procedures we are defiant
Strong and Worthy
We will never give up

Unable to purge
My thoughts of throbbing, thick *****
Penetrating me

I do not feel myself today
Stolen stunned sparkle sunned
Crystallizing adrenaline ***** hypertension maniac
Overwhelming in here. Crowded.
Always willing to be the first to jump
Potent love affairs with rushing wind and endless heights
Break apart.
Come undone.
Let go.
More surreal than tangible
Fading softly into the mist of kilauea
Great fire mother blessing me with the burning
Ablaze, a Phoenix from the flames, rising into the night
Bursting all over the constellations, adhering to the cosmos
Third eye open
Awed.
Amazed.

We are our addictions
If not we wouldn't be willing to
Bleed so quick
On an endless search to find like minded companies
When we are successful we dig in
Casting out whitty barb edged hooks
Exotic, ****** verse to shock and ensnare
I can feel yours just as easily as I feel myself sinking into you
Our chaotic experience of the waking world
Leaked out on paper, line after scathing line
Consume. Saturate. Devour. Paralyze.
We soak up the mysteries.
The miseries.
And everything in between
Sharing and tearing
Scaring and airing
Naked. Open. Bare.
Our soul fire burns up quick and bright like coal
The smoke often just as *****
Eclipsing preconceived notions
You know nothing of our dark pleasures
Aching secrets that have us wandering into the night
In search of something.
Thousands of words but never enough
Always searching for something
Our indulgences outweigh your pride
We will air your laundry too, uncaring
Just enough to shame and cower
Our only vulnerability is our inability to succeed from our talents
For it is only in death that we find **immortality

How could you affect me still?
Even these pages cannot forget
Outlines of shadows staining their surface
Soaking up your soft, fading scents of cemeteries and midnight walks
Haunting my dreams, driving me mad
With wanting the unattainable
I lick parched lips from a desert mouth
Tasting salt and sand
Unable to erradicate the memory of your teeth
Penetrating. Every. Thought.
Lush and violent retaliation lashes through me
How could I abstain?
To heady of a high to not fully submerge myself
In the black ,depthless veil just before dawn
Pulling me under, deep, just like you
Alone.
Just like you

You sit patiently at my feet
Humming earth vibrations lulling you to sleep
Your fragile warmth sinks into me
My soil cradles your cosmic divinity
Sharing the soft breeze of a June afternoon
Knowing you'll leave me all too soon
Wishing it could be different, our paths more whole
Growing like root trees out of the same fold
I will stay here growing while you go away
Waiting as night falls for another sunshine filled day