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Brett W Dec 2013
It's two in the morning of the new day
And I'm still awake thinking, that's all
I think back to a year ago from today
Same thing as i was, staring at the wall
Listening to A7X and We The Kings
Thinking about my everyday life
Back then, it was pain that led to stings
But now, it's like the onion is ripe
A few tears crawl down my face
As I think about the one girl I love
The one that lives in a distant place
The one to soon see me from above
Brett W Dec 2013
So after the day of my girlfriend’s birthday
Only one though disturbed me and it won’t leave
This may be your last birthday is your life, which is today
This is every young woman’s favorite birthday, the Sweet 16
All I would have wanted to do today was simply be there for you
Make you smile and enjoy the day you were brought into this world
All I wanted to do was to see you once more, but there’s nothing I can do
If I could teleport from place to place, I definitely will use it to see you, if I could
I hope that this thought isn’t popping into your head as well as mine
Because I can’t imagine what today will be like in exactly one year
If only you were still here with me and we had an indefinite amount of time
But soon there will be a time, creeping up on us quickly, where you will no longer be here
Think positive I constantly have to tell my aching mind
I have to look forward to the future, putting the past behind
So, yesterday (12-12) was my birthday and I turned 16 and today is my girlfriends birthday (12-13) and she's also now 16. She lives over one thousand miles away and I haven't seen her in almost seven months. She has cancer and was told in late August she has only has 6-12 months to live. So after saying that, while in school today, a thought popped into my head. This may be my girlfriends last birthday... Just the thought of losing her devastates me, and knowing that if this is in fact her last birthday, I'm not there to spend it with her. I really would do anything to spend this day with her...
Brett W May 2014
It happened a year ago in this date
I saw your face for the very last time
Although that day wasn't that great
It keeps my shaky life somewhat in line
Wasn't thinking about it much back then
I thought I'd see you in the near future
Now it's a matter of where and when
Your face blooms again like in nature
It feels like such a very long time ago
Much longer than this one lonely year
When I'll see you again I don't know
I do know an opportunity is now near
I wish to see you in my life once again
Yet I will worry about seeing your face
It'll bring back memories and the pain
That are frozen and locked in place  
My feeling have changed a lot since
Us no longer close is one of my fears
Thoughts about you makes me wince
As I try to hide my emotions and tears
I know since then we've drifted apart
You've moved on and are now different
I'm the same, healing my broken heart
I'm wondering where my old friend went
5/22/13
Last time I saw my ex-girlfriend (girlfriend at the time)
Brett W Aug 2013
Day in and day out
I just think about leaving
I want to leave after a quick count
To leave this place and start something new
To me able to meet new people
Find new sights for my pupil

I want to create a new start
Find a new way to cure my stressed heart
Go and possibly meet new people out there
But there is only one person who always catches my eye
I wish to leave this place, and go see this somebody
And I would not want to return back to this place

I wish to start a new chapter in my life
Where I know nothing of the people around me
Cut up my past with a fictional knife
Just put what I want in my pocket and walk away
To walk away from the burning ashes of the past
But this new chapter will not be the very last
Brett W Feb 2014
Time is leaving me left in the dust
Leaving me out in the cold to rust
Time has been flying by without you
The possibility soon is making me blue
I can't imagine living in this world alone
Singing the blues in every different tone
I wonder if I have already lost the girl I knew
There is a possibility she's still deep inside you
There isn't much time left I sure do know
But I wish we could be happy, you never go
But it must be your unlucky and horrible fate
To enter heaven through the open holy gate
Brett W Jul 2014
I know that there is nothing left
It's all gone and left in the past
I'm not expecting any response
But this message will be my last
I just hope you are always okay
I hope you're life is always great
I'm happy to see you've move on
I'm not able to at that same rate
I'm still stuck in the past, oh well
I'm glad you went to prom and all
I'm truly happy that you're satisfied
But I wish us both didn't rapidly fall
If you wish to stop this is the place
I want to keep this short and clean
You're forever my only Polish buddy
Both of us made one amazing team
If you are to continue, just good luck
All I'm going to say is absolutely true
I am not the person you remembered
I am not a hundred percent over you
I do fear getting in another relationship
I fear getting way too deep once more
Just to fall even harder again and again
Just to get up and fight my internal war
I think I found someone else to be with
But I'm not sure anymore with my mind
It's been playing tricks on me for a while
Distracting me and making me fall behind
I still remember some dates clear as day
Someone can question me and I'll know
I can't shake these details out of my head
I wonder what it'll be like if you didn't go
I've been thinking about you a whole lot
Wondering what you're doing everyday
That's nothing I should even think about
I have my own life to worry about anyway
If you wish to talk, I will always be here
If you don't, that's fine, you can be free
Free of my annoyance and complaining
Now is the time that you can forget me
I really had to say that for some reason
I'm sorry if this will hurt you in any way
I just want you to be happy and you are
And maybe we can talk again some day
Brett W Nov 2014
You are born, you live, and die
It is the most common cycle
Everyone encounters this event
However, some sooner than others
Life is not to be taken for granted
Some are not blessed like you and I
Some only see the world for a second
Then close their eyes to never open again
I fear the day that I will never again wake
I will regret some decisions I have made
I will look back and see the pain I caused
I will never be able to change any of it
I wish to die in the common way of age
People die all the time in numerous ways
Heart attacks to cancer to the battlefield
Some of these people are innocent
And have done nothing wrong in life
They bring happiness to those around
Why can't I die in this way instead of them
People just can't take life for granted
It can be ripped away like candy from a kid
Or a mole caught in the neighbors trap
Live your life to the fullest every day
Because you will see the end at some point
We all see birth, we live, and then we die
Birth, life, death
Brett W Jun 2013
When you start off in life
Everyone starts the same way
Fresh and with no strife
Not yet will pain need to be washed away

When you come to the first branch
There are multiple ways you can travel
You could go left to the larger open patch
Or to the right that is full of loose gravel

Everyone in the maze faces a hardship at some time
It depends on when it starts and how often it occurs
Some people that go left start off perfectly fine
But after a while, their luck turns on them and defers

The people that headed right didn’t start off well
Facing many challenges but soon to have it straight
They soon will be able to hear that warning bell
Warning them about what is soon to happen past the next gate

There will some unexpected turns that you will take
That some include the death of a loved one
Or if you have a good time and meet someone at the lake
Or if you fail a big test and then you feel like life is done

In the end, everyone has the same fate
Everyone faces it at different times and stages
There is very little time for you to be able to wait
You have to live life while it continues turning pages
Brett W Jun 2014
In the past we were the same
Both compassionate and kind
Full of joy and always energized
Ready for what life threw at us
We were together in young love
Nothing will be breaking us apart
We felt invincible to our open world
We could do whatever we wanted
Today is now the opposite storyline
We are now separate in our own ways
I'm not sure about your characteristics
But I'm not as kind nor compassionate
I am a fragile human being in this world
Every word spoke, all actions, can hurt me
You now seem happy with someone else
And I'm alone in my own cruel universe
In the future who knows the outcome
The future is something of the unknown
You can't base the future from past facts
But you can create speculations from them
You can predict you life in another ten years
But you can't be positive that'll be the result
I do know however that I'll still be living life
While you're gone from here, in the afterlife
"Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." Forrest Gump
Brett W May 2014
I'll leave it plain and simple
I'm currently living in the past
Each memory creating a wrinkle
But these times were a blast
I had enjoyed my life back then
I had a person close to my heart
We talked again and yet again
I thought I found my missing part
That's what set in undesirable pain
I fell deep into a hole of nothingness
I'm standing alone out in the rain
Waiting for the return if greatness
But that shall never come to me
I'm living in the past and losing hope
My life is now dark and terribly nasty
This nastiness can't cleaned with soap
I'm living with a questionable future
I want to relive what is in my past
I want to leave this horrendous torture
And erase all thoughts of you at last
I always tell others not to live in the past, but I don't listen to myself and now I'm living in the past because it's my last resort it seems
Brett W Sep 2015
Looking off into the sunset
Dreaming about my Juliet
Someone I may have met
Or maybe it's not time yet
I stare off into the distance
Thinking of her existence
Thinking quite so intense
Painful, so I slightly wince
My heart feels so alone
Aching like a broken bone
I let out a very faint moan
As I look down at my phone
No one there at my side
And I must now decide
Do I remain alone and hide
Or leave loneliness behind
I'm wanting to create a possible series, "One Word Can Bring Back a Thousand Memories" and this is the first of an unknown amount.
Brett W Dec 2013
Right now I feel lonely as can be
Because you’re not here with me
Not here to laugh and make each other smile
Since the last time I saw you has been a while
I feel alone sitting here independently
I sit here alone, thinking about you silently
But then I close my eyes and see your face
Then that lonely feeling is finally erased
On my old emotionless face is now a smile
I’m hoping you are as well, despite the distance
I would do anything to see you, walk every mile
To relive all the happiness in remembrance
Brett W Mar 2015
Fresh out of the womb, is a newborn baby seeing this cruel world for the first time. His loving parents cry tears of joy at this new light in their life. After a few years, his parents have twin girls, and all attention is off of him then. He sits in his room alone all day like he's in detention. He goes to school and is the one quiet kid that seems so insecure to others. He wishes to make new friends but he's afraid of the others. He finally makes one good friend in middle school, but then he had to move away from his one and only friend to the other side of the country. He is once again, that lonely kid in the corner throughout all of middle and high school. At the age of 17, just a few days before his 18th birthday, he comes home and sees his mother face down on the kitchen floor. He is unsure of what to do, so he calls his father, crying while he caresses his mothers heavy head. He remains on the phone with his dad, and he hears a loud screech in the background, a bang, and then silence. He tries calling back and no answer. He calls 911 and when they get there, they confirm his mother died of a heart attack. His father however, he is unsure of what happened. He watches the news that night, and sees the breaking news about a multi-car accident that resulted in the death of 4 people, one of which is his father. He's heartbroken now. He is unsure of how he will live. He finishes school, works a full 40 hour week, and is a single man living in a small apartment in the city. One day, this beautiful young women moves into the room next door. He instantly falls in love. He takes her out to the bar a few times, and then she suddenly disappears. A few nights after he last saw her, he sees on the news about a young women who died of a drug overdose. It was the women he once thought he loved. He decides to remain single throughout the rest of his life. At age 85, he realized he had no one left. His parents have been dead for almost 70 years, he is unsure how his twin sisters are doing because he hasn't talked to them in over 50 years. He was last with a woman over 50 years ago. He then passes away at the age of 91 due to just old age. No one attends his funeral. No one even realizes he's gone. His lonely soul is now gone from this Earth, and not one human being realizes it. All because of a lonely childhood and unfortunate luck, this beautiful young boy had a loving family but died with no one left to care.
Not my usual style, but a little story I have. To be honest, I wrote it in only 10 minutes so it could have some issues with it but it's fine.
Brett W Jun 2014
They depend on so much to work out
They need faith and trust in each other
It needs believing in anything just about
Help is needed from father and mother
Just to make sure everything is straight
Criticism will always occur in such thing
Certain criticism can actually be great
Because more faith is white it will bring
You can try your hardest just to succeed
I don't think they work out at the very end
There is other necessities that you do need
I don't have anything there to recommend
I learned from experience they tend to fail
Here are a few tips if you choose the risk
If your partner communicates less just bail
Meaning something can no longer be fixed
Remain in contact as much as possible
Try to see each other with some device
Keep your schedule clear and flexible
To talk to the other or you'll pay the price
I don't find them successful but that's me
You may find them amazing and perfect
Mine left me alone but always feeling free
In the end it left me in a disastrous wreck
Brett W Jan 2016
Hey bro are you doing alright?
Yeah, I'm fine, thanks man
But that "I'm fine" is a lie
He really just wants to die
Hey girl, you feeling better?
Yeah, better than I was yesterday
But she really is a day closer to death
But she hides that pain underneath
Hey mom, is Jeremy going to be okay?
Yes, your brother is in a better place
But Jeremy is really already gone
And mom knows that where he belongs
Hey, I like your new shirt Vanessa
Thanks, these sleeves are comfortable
But really, the sleeves cover her scars
As she is afraid for her father behind bars
Hey, you doing okay about Samantha?
Yeah, I'm over her, it's all good
But you know you're no where near "fine"
As she is on your mind all the time
Hey, Jessica, you over Benjamin yet?
Yeah, he means nothing to me now
Each night, mascara runs down your face
As you miss his touch and his embrace
People lie to make it seem like they're fine
But we've all been there, they're not fine
They just want to curl into a ball and cry
Right now, that's me. I just want to cry...
I've had this idea for a while actually, I could just never gain the courage to write it... It's definitely different from how I normally write but I like it...
Brett W Sep 2015
It can be to another human being
Or to an animal with little meaning
It can be as simple as sight seeing
Or as complex as mountain skiing
One can love an object in their hand
Or a group or an activity like a band
One can request love or be a demand
But to find true love is truly grand
You may think you some someone
Until the inevitable becomes undone
And you now sit there holding a gun
But it will soon get better my son
One can not dwell on the distant past
Or dream about the near future at last
One must live during the present blast
Or else their end will come quite fast
Love can be the beginning or the end
Of a life one must be able to defend
Here is one simple trick I recommend
Don't fall too deep, or life will be a lend
Another added on to " One Word Can Bring Back a Thousand Memories"
Brett W Jan 2014
I wish I was able once again love
I just need that encouraging shove
To push me to continue carrying on
Not to wait too long, until time's gone
I wish to hold someone's gentle hand
Make her smile to make our time grand
Peer deep inside her majestic, deep eyes
Wipe away her tears from her previous cries
Have a wonderful and beautiful wedding day
Live a long life together, enjoying all we say
Take long walks on the beach, through a cave
Deeply mourn the death on the others grave
Our love has taken it's course upon our souls
Helping succeed at our most important life goals
Having a successful, lifelong true love
Brett W Feb 2014
The sun beating on your face
Sweat drips down your back
You can't move out of your place
No time to go eat a day snack

Commands to the left and right
You reply by yelling your reply
Clarinets sounding shrill and bright
Visuals where you pretend to die

The cheers of the applauding fans
All there to witness a marching program
There to support all the local bands
Not as simple as Mary Had a Little Lamb

The season ends like a firework finale
All hard work and dedication pays off
Until the final band's ferocious rally
They leave the field silently, not even a cough

Dut dut dut, band ten hut, band left face
All the wonderful sounds of a new start
A new year to set the show back in place
And play the music majestically from the heart
Brett W Apr 2014
Every single time that I can manage
I try forget my many thoughts about you
I'm always left in a deep disadvantage
Resulting in me feeling down and blue
I have my good days and then my bad
I have the great days and then horrible
Remembering the memories I once had
Leaving me alone, afraid and vulnerable
I see you smiling doing what you love
I lay here, remember how I made you feel
Everything was fit for the perfect size glove
But now I need time for my heart to heal
My world is not the same without you here
I miss having my sweet friend here so near
I miss seeing you happy with me my dear
But it's over and the end is near, that I fear
Brett W Nov 2014
My heart remains free from all
My soul is on a cliff about to fall
My ****** lips still remain shut
My feelings still deep in my gut
I will not show love anytime soon
I will lose my soul by the next noon
I will never seem to kiss someone
I will regurgitate my love on the run
I always say I will remain forever alone
I always give my self a surprise there
I always speak in my calm, shy tone
I always end up in a deal that's not fair
I wish I could fall in love once more
I wish my soul would remain near
I wish happiness in behind the door
I wish my new love is nothing to fear
I am a crumbling mess it seems to me
No one else can see much difference
No one can tell happiness is lost at sea
I am now the only considerable reference
I have the only people needed to fly by
And those are just me, myself, and I
If anyone has a suggestion for a different title, feel free to comment or send me a message. Thanks
Brett W Dec 2013
This is the magnificent time of the year
Where all family and friends are near
Joyful times spreading holiday cheer
Having all loved ones with you here
Full of happiness, joy and ultimate surprise
Where the words "Merry Christmas" reprise
Waking up early to witness the glamorous sunrise
To a night filled with delicate food and numerous pies
Have a safe and happy holiday my fellow friend
Savor this day because it happens once a year, comprehend?
Enjoying this day with all loved ones is what I recommend
This day fulfilled with joy will soon come to an abrupt end
Brett W Jun 2014
I have been unobservant as of late
Many opportunities have flown by
I feel like I currently have a full plate
I sometimes wonder why I even try
I feel like breaking down in a mess
I wish I had come through at times
Now that it's too late I must confess
I want to cry as if I bathed in limes
I wanted to see you here once more
I feel like this could've been the last
Another opportunity now out the door
I'm not imagining a blast from the past
This is only one that had come and gone
Out of the many that I can't even count
More will happen before the break of dawn
If I had to count this impossible amount
I would need every hand in this town
I have missed opportunities everyday
With missing all these, I feel like a clown
I must take control is every possible way
Brett W Jan 2014
I know that us being together is the past
And I wish that it were like it used to be
But I have to stop living in the past at last
And to focus on living life again as just me
So far, I’m not doing so well with moving on
But I’m doing better than I thought I would
I don’t want you to disappear and be gone
I want to be able to see you again, if I could
I know I told you this in the past but it’s true
You’re really beautiful and sweet in every way
Seeing your smile used to turn my world blue
However lately, it’s not your fault, they’re gray
Brett W Dec 2015
When I sleep, I dream of her
When I'm awake, I think of her
I no longer can sleep anymore
Because I'm happy when I dream
And it saddens me when I wake
I have been trying for years now
And I thought my efforts payed off
I finally started to talk to her again
Thinking I no longer had to move on
But of course, like always, I was wrong
I'm back at it again, trying to forget
But is it really worth it? I don't know
We still may have a future together
But I can't cash those checks in yet
I have to move on from her for now
And it's hard, she's always on my mind
Everything is meant to happen for a reason
And this is a clear example, I must move on
Brett W Jul 2014
For some strange reason
I feel that I must write this
I am not sure what to say
I guess I'll just start anyway
I'm not sure how I feel now
I'm having ups and downs
Not liking who I've become
I wish this was all finally done
I put myself in pain everyday
I never try resisting any hate
I use this hate and fear to rise
Rise above all as a surprise
I miss the person I used to be
Happy and loving of the world
Now I wish to just leave it all
Letting myself continue to fall
Unsure where to go with my life
Going with where the flow goes
I'm not sure where to even start
I could just follow my dark heart
But that's been wrong all along
It pointed me to failure in my life
I thought it could help me through
But it just led me straight to you
I thought you were the only one
The only woman important to me
I know now that I was just wrong
I know it was never you all along
You just destroyed what remained
I now have nothing in my heart
I can't blame everything on you
It was my fault, I hope you knew
I was the reason it all went to hell
It was and is my fault it all fell apart
I am the reason I'm who I am today
It was my fault with this price to pay
This actually started off with no clue on what to write but then it just became like a rant
Brett W May 2014
It disappears and then it shall return
Each time it is leaving a new harsh burn
Leaving me a brand new lesson to learn
As the pages of life continue to turn
It's been 126 days since the disappear
Happiness doesn't seem to come back
Happiness came to me this past year
A year ago on this day, I left the black
It seemed to stick around for a long while
Until it left 126 days ago, not being the same
It has left me lonely, depressed and in denial
And I do not have anything still to blame
Because I can't control my own destiny
But I can control how free I shall always be
I should always be happy with what I have
It's friends and family that make you laugh
Being with those are close is good enough
Especially when times turn and become rough
I don't know when happiness shall return
One thing from this experience I will learn
Is that you can't depend on one human being
If you depend on only one, you end bleeding
Because your mind and heart will quickly break
And you'll eventually have way to much to take
You will think there is nothing left in your life
But I learned you need to fight through strife
Because you only grow stronger every day
With time, life will be easier in every way
Just try to remain in your one happy place
Take your time walking through life's race
It's been 126 days since my ex-girlfriend broke up with me and a year ago from today was when we got together
Brett W Jan 2014
My aching, pounding heart
Searches again to ease the pain
To find a new place to start
Instead of standing in the rain
I will search once again to find someone

I thought my loneliness was cured
I think about that, knowing I was wrong
And once it was over, it wwas not absurd
On the time it took to realize, not very long
But I can never give up, I will never be done

In hopes I can find someone very soon
I think about what I can do to change
Search near and far, here and to the moon
There is no search that is out of range
Because I'll never give up, until all hope is gone

.
Brett W Jul 2014
It all started as a simple road trip to see the one I used to love. She's sick and doesn't have much longer. I drive there alone and almost get myself killed along the way, but I arrive safely. I get there, welcomed by her family. We eat and she's not there. Her dad gets a call that they all have to leave for New York that night, but she's still not around. They all decide to leave me in charge of her safety. I go to see her and tell her that she can go to New York and I'll take her there. "I would rather die here. Please leave me alone" she whispers to me. I push aside her request and take her to the airport. Along the way, we stop at the light I look at her, move closer in, and there's where it ended.
What a dream...
Brett W Nov 2013
Even though I contain multiple desires
There is really one that I want above all
Walk beyond hills and through perilous wires
Be there to catch you if you ever fall
Make you shine that beautiful smile
Until you have to leave once again
But I will walk to you every single mile
Anything to see you and ease this pain
Every day I wish to see your beautiful face
But we are fighting against time in an endless race
Brett W Jan 2014
In my own special and spectacular land
Sickness, death and rebirth will never occur
The constant playing from a marching band
All year, from all of January through December
All citizens are to be immune to the ability to age
Weaponry is illegal, punishable by banishment
All criminals will be banished and live in a cold cage
The only leaders would be the ones with commitment
Lastly, the only missing part of all this is who will lead
I elect myself as king, and to have you my lovely queen
I will always be there for you, give you all that you need
We will rule this wonderful land, and everything in between
Brett W Jan 2017
I am not sure why I am single
I am told I'm a fantastic guy
That will make any girl happy
But how come I'm avoided
I will treat her like a queen
Spoil her with my undying love
And incomparable affection
Do anything to see her smile
Letting her know she's special
The most beautiful girl in my eyes
I will be loyal to my gorgeous queen
Not allow anyone between us
What is holding me back though
Is it my looks? My confidence?
Is it just me? Or is it society?
Whenever my queen comes along
I will treat her like royalty
We will rule this world together
Me as king, and her as my queen
Brett W Oct 2013
The smile that you see on my face
Every day of these lengthy years
It’s fake and feels out of place
But I pretend to smile for my peers

I don’t want to show how I feel
Because some people will call me a shame
I need this fake smile like it’s my last meal
Because it’s the only thing that hides my pain

There is really only one person you there
Who can bring the real smile out of me
But that one person is no longer here
But I’ll soon see her again, and truly smile
You’ll see
Brett W Sep 2015
Who are you and what is your name?
Our eyes met once the rain concluded
Both of our intentions were the same
Finals performance, wanting to be included
It was the first marching contest of the year
And I get to see her once more at the last
It is her voice I believe I still can now hear
Even through the enormous trumpet blast
I don't even know your name or your story
But I do know your beauty and personality
You're sweet and have the sense of glory
To see your band not fall to any brutality
I can not wait to see you again in a month
Our bands will rise while our motives stay still
The competition to see you again will be tough
I won't forget you until then my mystery girl
Brett W Dec 2013
I never in a thousand days
Would worry about our relationship
But it could fall apart in numerous ways
Commonly by an unwanted hardship
Right now, I'm worrying about you
Because you're facing a challenge
Being on death's doorstep like a few
Losing energy, you retain enough for a final lunge
My main worry is not having you in my life
Time is running down faster than we could imagine
Faster time runs out, more than to our belief
There's no way I'll let this disease destroy your passion
I worry that I will not be to keep you happy until the end
You will fade away in a tremendous amount of sadness and despair
But as the time left for you continues to descend
I will do my best to keep you happy, as long as I'm here
I will love you until the very end, no matter what anyone says
Because you are now down to living your very last days
Thank you for reading. I wrote this pretty late at night now hopefully it's good.
Brett W Dec 2014
Lately I've been thinking of you
How you have been everyday
What in everyday is then new
I can think of you in any way
I really want to talk to you
It's been over half of a year
And for me, nothing is new
There is a lot I want to hear
Now with every passing day
I have a want to talk to you
And I have so much to say
That I can only say to a few
This want to talk is now a need
It grows and grows like a beast
Ready to finally at get it's feast
Waiting as my open wound bleeds
Not talking to someone that I care for since March? Kind of a long time right there
Brett W Oct 2013
Even though it seems as if already defeated
You can’t just give up all at one time
You have to fight until you are seated
Remain strong like a thick grape vine
Even though you lose a few battles
It does not mean you have already lost the war
Your body will obtain a few rattles
But the excruciating pain will soon be nevermore
Brett W Jul 2014
It seems to happen at night
My happiness suddenly dies
My old self is back in my sight
Back to the distrust and lies
I look back to many years ago
Remembering how I felt then
Those years took a heavy blow
Making me retreat to defend
I look back to the happy days
When I had someone to hold
To guide me through the haze
Warming me in the harsh cold
It is nights like this where I cry
When I regret something I said
I will always continue to try to fly
Until my heart is cold and dead
Brett W Apr 2016
First of all, I would like to say thanks
For being caring during a time like this
However, you don't need to worry
You did what you thought was right
And that's all you could have done
Prom, it doesn't matter much to me
Sure I want a date to it, but I don't mind
I know you would have went with me
But I want you to be happy, not me
I control myself, and it is as simple as that
So there's no need to worry about me
You made your decision, and I made mine
Be happy, no need to worry about me
I am fine
Brett W Jan 2014
No one here to hold
No one here to trust
Nothing left to unfold
To wipe away the dust
No one left to love
No one left to talk
Nothing from above
Nowhere left to walk
No one left for me
No one left to cry
Nothing to set me free
Until my heart will die
Brett W Apr 2014
I'm not prepared for anything
I'm not prepared to face my fear
Not ready to give someone the ring
I'm not ready for anything, far or near
Not ready for what my future has in store
Not ready to accept the certain facts
I'm not prepared to shut the past door
I'm just wanting to lay low and just relax
I'm not ready to be in a wonderful relationship
As much as I want to, I'm not mentally ready
My happiness remains hanging with tight grip
While my aching heart remains alone and needy
I'm not prepared to meet new people anymore
Because I'm afraid to break down in the mix
I'm constantly fighting my internal war
Waiting for something new in life to fix
Brett W Oct 2016
I had a wonderful time
Reminiscing the old days
Marching competitions all day
And just being with all my friends
Returning for the last of the season
After graduating the previous year
I met some brand new faces
And was greeted by the familiar ones
But one face stood out the most today
One I have not known for very long
But long enough to cherish and recognize
She is in a tough and stressful period
And I am trying to assist her any way I can
Seeing her most of the day made me realize
How much I miss being close to a female
I offered her my sweater when she was cold
And cuddled together to keep warm
But we are just friends. Or are we?
I am not really sure at this moment
As I saw the tears ruin her perfect makeup
I consoled her to the best of my ability
Am I starting to grow feelings for her?
Does she seem to like me back?
These are all questions that remain unanswered
But one thing I am sure about in this situation
Is I am getting close to a female once more
I am not sure on my true feelings toward her
Brett W Jul 2014
I can clear up all this endless agony
With one slick decision I can't make
I think of anyway to become happy
And I'll do whatever it will even take
I'm pretty sure I found where to start
She's energetic yet has a calm soul
I wonder if she can fix my dark heart
Making life energetic instead of dull
I fear that I could hurt someone else
I went through it and I am still stuck
I can't seem to get out of this mess
Even whenever I muster some luck
I wish I was able to make the choice
To say a thing to a certain someone
It is me that has a controlling voice
To end more chaos before it's begun
Brett W May 2016
It will be one of these days
All the rage bottled in me
All of the built up anger
Then it will all just explode
It keeps building each day
From people and myself
When I finally will explode
I will change as a person

One of these days, I will find love
I thought I found it at one point
But that all was just a lie I guess
Maybe it will happen, one day
But in the meantime, I am patient
Yet impatient, as I have been waiting
But when I finally find my love
It will be a huge weight lifted away

One of these days, I will be happy
A true, generous smile on my face
Not some fake nonsense of a smile
Maybe I will be truly happy again
But while I wait, I am optimistic
I am trying to find it in smaller things
But it's only in the larger ideas I see it
And when I'm truly happy, I will fly freely

One of these days, I will be living the dream
Not necessarily living a luxurious dream life
But just knowing I'm proud of where I am
Living with a beautiful wife and great kids
Working at a job so I can support my family
And the job allowing ample time to enjoy life
When I finally see the dream as a possibility
I will grab hold and never let go as long as I live
Brett W Mar 2015
There is one word today
That can destroy my day
I try to avoid it in any way
But it has something to say
It reminds me of good times
When I once had good rhymes
I lived life outside the lines
And lived freely without fines
It can make a good day bad
I go from a happy to a sad
I can enter a weekend glad
And leave it all just as mad
It seems to have ruined me
I can't think it without misery
I can't say it to remain free
And I will die of it, you'll see
That one word that will end me
Is just a simple five letter word
Two simple syllables we all know
And the effect on my life is absurd
That one word happens to be a name
A name that I once used to adore
But now it seems to ruin all I do
As I lose everything that's in store
Sarah, Sarah, Sarah, Sarah, Sarah
The name constantly echoes in my head
And seems to continue until I am dead
Sarah...
Brett W Dec 2014
It was two thirds of a year
It was a great eight months
Although it was very difficult
We pushed on to success
We faced major setbacks
Undesirable amounts of pain
And the last but not least
The fear of you leaving earth
In eight months we faces a lot
More than others in two years
Our relationship was unique
And it sure was special to me
But it seems like you forgot
It is just an evil presence to you
And although it's nothing to you
Our relationship meant a lot to me
Part 3 of 4 in the "My Distant Memories" series
Brett W Sep 2013
As I look out the window
I can see far and near
See all the colorful flowers
That bloom every year

The cars whistle by
The birds chirp so freely
The sky roars and cries
Making the day become dreary

The rain soon pours down
It clears off the dirt
And splatters on the ground
And wettens your shirt

The sky then becomes free
The sun peeks out
Here comes the honey bee
Starting his daily route
Brett W Jan 2016
Today in my anatomy class
We did an experiment on pain
Seeing if you could feel a needle
Pricking at your skin slightly
Well, I never felt a single thing
I told my partner to push harder
Still nothing, I felt no pain at all
When I got home, I looked at myself
Connecting that experiment to my life
I no longer can feel pain it seems
Unless it is just excruciating pain
But I don't feel anything, I am nothing
I will always have sympathy for people
But I can no longer feel the pain myself
I will help others through tough situations
But then when I'm in something similar
I feel nothing, not caring about myself
Is this an issue? Yes, I know it is
I have no feelings, but filled with emotion
Maybe it's good I feel nothing at all
Because now I won't be hurt anymore
Brett W Feb 2014
To be totally honest with you
I'm not doing so hot here alone
These feelings are nothing new
But what I say to you now is true

I miss you the most out of us all
Feelings I can no longer condone
I miss seeing you down the hall
Trying to see you through the wall

But the past is gone in the past
Set the experiences to a low prone
I wish those times didn't go so fast
But it's gone, here a new start at last
Brett W Feb 2016
Every time I see her eyes
In a crisp, clear photograph
I feel something suddenly drop
Maybe my heart leaving my body
I just feel like breaking down
Letting the tears flow freely
But I still remain headstrong
Somehow, someway, I'm strong
I will look at a picture of her
And sometimes crack a smile
But then the memories flow in
And I collapse in undesired pain
That smile, those eyes, haunting me
So beautiful, a word a rarely say
To anyone involved in my life
Beautiful she is in every photograph
But only if these were real
The beauty will truly show
But so will my emotions
The tears, the break downs
All from a beautiful photograph
Brett W Dec 2014
I am still unaware of who you are
And you may also be as unaware
However, soon we will both know
Towards each other is where to go
I am still unsure if you exist in my life
I am unsure if I am involved in yours
However, we will both know someday
That love will bind us tighter everyday
But when will that certain day happen
When will it occur we find each other
Will it be a miserable evening of care
Or an exciting challenge of truth or dare
We may never know until the day comes
We wait and watch the rise of many suns
Both knowing one day we will be together
Even though neither may know each other
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