My body shakes
Bones break
People are dying
But nobody's crying
I just want to know
Why?
Muscles are ripped off my bones
I have never felt more alone
Migraines make a home in my head
Can't I just go back to bed?
It is the strangest feeling
When you no longer hope for healing
But to tear off your skin
Your mentality is wearing thin
Where do I go now, sweet tragedy?
This planet has no place for me.
However, I do not hope for death
Only a space in which to catch my breath.
Is there any magic wand that can twirl
Me down the path into a different world?

The echoes in your eyes chase around me,
the stationary winds of time,
whistling around warily.
Your expression says more than we care to say.
It's an expression of none,
of media res; drifting with a melancholy melody.
I'll never understand my resentment for you
that melts into infatuation whenever I look into your eyes.

Look into those innocent eyes,
You have defiled.
Why not just leave me here,
And go crack one of your electric smiles?

I hear your circuits whir,
Your bolts, they gleam.
Run fingers through your hair,
Watch as they dream.

I still hold onto you,
Unravelled by your games.
I'd love you call you out,
But I'm not naming names.
"Oh babe."

Eyes cut like knives,
Wit sharper still.
Why don't you just leave me here,
And go crack one of your electric smiles.
*Somewhere else.

I think I'm going crazy
From torturing myself with pictures
From reading your emails until I can no longer breathe.
For last night I ran away in my sleep
I was fast and went far and seldom looked back.

It started when I went for a walk
And turned my phone off
To escape reality.
And yet, these misconfigured beings
They chased me all the while.
My body started talking
How badly am I hallucinating?

My legs told me
"I don't want to run anymore."
My hands told me
"I don't want to fight anymore."
My brain told me
"I don't want to think anymore."
Therefore
I allowed myself to give up.

And it didn't feel so bad after all.
I was on my own
No one knew where I was
No one cared either.
I took a bus straight out of Hell
To some mysterious land.

Suddenly,
I realized I was seeing spots
Light peaked through the darkness
But I was not gone.
I was lying in the middle of a parking lot
Trying to get some sleep
And trying to avoid the fact
That maybe crazy isn't a big enough word
To describe what I have become.

To sum it all up,
I don't think anyone
has been able to
understand me as well as you did -
understand me enough to know
I needed help understanding myself.
So when you left,
you left me in this trance
where I didn't know whether
to walk back or run forward.
Instead, I lit myself on fire
thinking it would be easier
to learn from scratch
than to fix broken glass.
But either way,
I came up confused with ****** hands.

gd

Words that echo in the corridoors
and passageways of an empty mind,
with no company from any-body, from any-thing.
Because no bodies, and no things, can replace what is missing.
Lonely, and looking for a place to be.

Lonely, in the most unsettling sense of the word.
The type of lonely that makes your bones feel cold
and the only thing that can warm you up
is a lightning bolt through your skeletal remains
but that requires you to feel something.
And you know you can't do that, you're too numb.
Too numb - because your mind is too empty.

It's like a game that you can't win,
you've always thought this, but you dare not admit it
because this will happen. You know your mind is vacant
and that once you think it, you will always think it
because words echo inside your head, and you can't forget it
once it's been said.