I spent so long thinking about you, that I can't seem to think about anything else,
The way your hands feel, The way your smile spreads, The way my heart feels when your around,
I've been thinking about how long we've been together, and how I don't know how to not be with you,
I started this relationship with you, but I didn't really have any expectations,
I just thought, "He's gorgeous, I want to date that." but my thoughts quickly changed from looks to,
I like his looks, but I love his heart,
And maybe that's when I really started falling in love with you, or maybe that was point where I was to far to ever come back, but then again; the two moments are practically interchangeable,
I remember our first date, and then our second date, and our third date, and that moment when I realized every time I saw you, it was like the first time; you always gave me butterflies,
So it comes to this, Where I'm about to go to college, and you're to big for this little town to hold,
and I swear I'm not mad, I just hope you remember me where ever you go,
and your heart always has a home with me.

Greedy spectators in the town
Gathered ‘round and drank in
The beauty of her dove white feathers,
The gentle glow of her silken crown.

Watching her rise above the rest,
They thought her to be –
A creature clearly more divine
Than those treading lowly ground.

But all the while,
Most unhappy with her pallid down,
She hoped for feathers Raven black
And thought the town to be –

Fools for blindly worshipping
So dreadfully false a design.

I was raised by my
Fixes everything
Does it on his own
Came home smellin' like grease and gasoline
Hugging us before changing his uniform
Kind of dad

A do what you're told when you're told to do it
Listen to what I'm saying
Don't talk back to me
Or you'll get it
Kind of dad

A quiet talking
Loud thinking
Says what's on his mind
Doesn't take no *******
Kind of dad

The taught me how to drive
To always tell the truth
Tell someone when you love them
Be respectful and kind
Kind of dad

A don't talk to strangers
Be home before dark
Be careful climbing that tree
Don't hit your brother
Kind of dad

A you're my favorite daughter
We can talk about anything
I love you always
No matter what
Kind of dad

Shadows creep over my skin
Like the empty touch of a lovers hand.
Slowly sliding, moving barely noticed
And yet felt.

One by one people disappear.
Left is the dark spot, the cold
Black hole where they stood.

The silence screams,
And bleeds my heart.

Four, three, two
Almost gone.

How long until none?

Quietly waiting for the last to leave.
Knowing, and yet knowing it cannot be prevented.
And yet hoping it won't happen...

What does one do alone?

I will cry.
Spotlighted on a lone stage.

Dread.

History always repeats itself.
And yet this time
There's nowhere to run.

Nowhere to hide
And yet no music to face.

Where do I go?

Sit in Limbo, uncollected, forgotten trash.

Words written on my hand:
fat, ugly, stupid, *****, ****, stubborn, mean, hateful,
jealous, *******, *****, hysterical, loser, selfish.

The ugly side of me.
I can't hide from it longer,
Because with no one here, there's just me.

My heart lay bleeding at my feet
I stare as you tear it apart.
I stagger back as you take your walk alone.

You say you're off balance,
So I go and the sides are even again.
You won't miss me when I'm gone.

You were my best friend and more.
I still want to be your friend, too.
But I need time to heal my heart.

You're not really gone, but to me you are and I miss you.
And I know you're not coming back.
So I'll see you around and we'll say hello.

I try, but can't put into words:
The sound of my heart shattering
The sight of the permanently gray skies etched into my mind
The feeling of your arms... I'll never feel again
The scent of the tears on my face
And the taste of them in my mouth

But my senses are numb.
I notice these things, but don't really feel them.
Isn't it tragic?

Stop showing
You love me
A little at a time.

Stop saying
You care
Bit by bit.

Stop keeping
Me here
For tiny pieces of time.

Because I need
All of you
Not piece by piece.

I love
All of you
Not just some parts of you.

So love all of me
All the way
All the time.

Or let all of me go
All at once
For good.