exhaustion has set in
taken over
every part of my being is tired
and dragging around enough baggage to get me through a lifetime
is starting to have its effects
i never thought each step would be so daunting
i see everyone around me able
to drop their bags at the front door
and run freely
without weight
i am forever strapped with resistance bands
making each step harder
and all the more worth it

The family of Edgar Allan Poe must feel conflicted
"My grandfather was a great man," they'd say.
"Didn't his family disown him?" the others contradicted.
Leave him in the dust? Spit on his ashes?
The life of this poor ignorant wastrel,
Alcoholic, joining the ranks of *****,
No one to help him or care for
the name who became great, under the shadow of his glasses
the invisible-giant, not recognized, "his wife was a *****,"
No, no, no, Edgar. Not today.
Your confused sexuality is really gay,
The cousins jeer and aunts-uncles jibe
Great poets, queens alike do cry
At the works of this man, at the end of the day,
(we don't really care if he lived or died,)
"It was the other side of the family that did it.
Not I."

I wonder what you hold in the pockets of your jeans
the ones you won't throw out
because of the
"maybe one day"
or
"just in case"
I wonder if you slip those jeans on
in the dead of night
remembering what you hold so dearly
so dearly
you wont get rid of
but wont show
I wonder, I wonder, I do

After Sunday you stink of hypocrisy
Please don't waste your breath preaching to me
To me it's one big joke
as you line up for the punch line
Wearing your see through clothes
and flaunting your plastered eyes
Keep funding your guilt
as I kick back and criticize
Pockets full of change
I wound not spare a dime