Thinking. Searching, asking for more.
But what, in my mind do I want to explore?
Define, dissolve, I don’t have a clue.
Not really knowing, what’s it I wanna do.

Looking, delving, confusingly so,
I stare into empty space, knowing not where to go.

What is it? I ask? What is it that I must?
A crossroad, a journey, or something from the past?
The answer I guess, is out there somehow,
I clasp my hands together, my head in a bow.

Hoping, believing, go on, and dig deeper,
Stay still, look out, be content and feel better;
All the answers will, in its time get their cue,
But now learn to wait and you’ll get them when they’re due.

Constricted
by an invisible
chain...
closed bars
are in my way.
I hold it
close in
my hand,
but it fled
from my grasp...
i look up
and saw
the vast
starry skies
and wished...
And it answered,
“soon.”

(Have you ever felt free but not really free at all? Have you ever felt like there's a string attached to your neck? That you can move but you cannot run? That you can smile but you cannot laugh? Provokes rebellion...)

(1)

How painful can it be
To let somebody go?
How sorry can you be
When it's the only love you'll know.

Abused...misused...confused.

My heart breaks into a million pieces,
It aches silently...
My heart beats slowly, unable to breathe
If this can be classified as dying
Then I'm already dead.

I can't explain
The pain I feel at the moment...
I'm in a state of shock.
Trying to fight the pain
That keeps on seeping in my heart.
I wanted to cry...
But I'm trying to hold back the tears
that's been waiting to fall down
On my cheeks...
I wanted to shout,
Instead,
I scream silently
In pain...
As I try to be brave...
Hoping against hope
That I would be able to go through this
In spite of everything...
That I would be able to survive...
As I lost the one person
That keeps me alive.

Confusion seeps in...
Degenerates the heart.
As the mind
Starts to wonder
And seeks for an answer.
Blank vision
Void mind
Stares...
Into empty space.
Where do you go?

I just remember that we do pray a lot
when we need something.
And pray more
for more.  
Sometimes we pray
just for the sake of praying,
or to be thankful
for blessings in four.  

When blessed we pray,
and when not, we stray,
So God knocks
through challenges and strife.
Since He knew
that’s the only time we do pray
and He knew, it is with our might.

Remember though
that not all prayers are answered,
it can be a yes or a no.
Sometimes we wait,
and see what will happen
when it comes God says,
‘because I said so’.

So pray and pray
and pray and pray
That’s because
it’s what we all can.

It might be yes or a no,
it does not matter
If we believe then
we know it will be done.

Close your eyes and sleep;
Put your body in a deep slumber.
Open your eyes and meet,
HE who is your Keeper.