Be my constant
like Desmond
and the Island

When you and me
met between nosebleeds
and seizures of consciousness

We looked to the sky
and watched
electromagnetic
explosions

That held our hearts
pumping out supernovas
In their hands
we were Gods
respectively
blowing
Buddha minds
out of proportion
re-enacting
some center stage production
of how we shift our own reality

Subtly
unspoken
devoid of emotions
lost like a lighter
in a smoke circle

Offsetting
the light and darkness

But You were always my constant
again and again
in
flash-backs
flash-forwards
flash-sideways
*We could never escape the timeline

Creepy is a compliment to me
I admit I like to bleed
I just cannot help my crush
Oh the way it makes me rush
The way it flows
The way it grows
The saying "make blood boil"
Causes me such turmoil
Do I prefer it cold
Though that's pretty bold
Or maybe, should I heat it up
Before I go and eat it up
Baby what's your recipe
Share your secrets with me

i wont.
i wont make another
passage in my
skin like i
used to.
i wont allow the
blade to control me
again over someone.
i wont let myself
get to where i
was just a
few months ago
because being who
i was isn't who i
want to be
now.

ive finally started caring
again and even though
it hurts sometimes,
the pain isn't as
bad as it was when
i had nothing left
inside.

ive quickly learned how
fast sadness lets
itself back
in.

people ask me what i
believe in all the time.
maybe god or buddhism or
maybe even poems that
rhyme.
but i believe in
the universe and
the art that surrounds me
so,
there is a black hole in the
middle
that not many people
do know.
i believe in art
and the smiles on
her face,
i also fall for her
and her un denying
grace.
i believe in books
wether fiction or
not,
i believe in the facts that
tell me the sun is
hot.
I've heard that there isn't
any room for God in
science,
but maybe there is if
you show some
appliance.
and the stars that shine
above,
are hydrogen gases that push and
shove.

the middle of our galaxy is
a massive black hole,
not even light can escape,
nothing ever whole.
you see the parts of me,
and you think, "oh shes so fine!"
but deep inside of me is
that black hole heart  of
mine.

lets be a star;
lets fuse like
hydrogen and
make helium,
lets become dense
and be something
beautiful.

but we shouldn't
become to dense,
we might blow up
if we do.


and that wouldn't be okay,
now would it?

im pretty sure i
eat less than
i should.

i dont have time for
breakfast and
the lunch at school is usually
gross.
i eat a lot at dinner but
thats all.
i dont get hungry but
im not trying to get
skinny either.

thats the thing:
im not trying and
yet im achieving

also, i just
dont have the
time.

i doubt i even eat
over 1000 calories anymore.
and considering we do
******* workouts at
school every other day;
im losing weight.

it feels nice to
fit in my
homecoming
dress.