That's not a God, that's a sense of entitlement
A sugarcoated dishevelment in disguise
You don't have dreams, just infatuations
Turning hope into self-indulgent lies

I turned away from New York just to know you
Silver showered soldiers singing serene
I turned away from myself just to love you
But I don't think you know what love means

You're not alone, just afraid of isolation
Afraid no one will be better than me
I'm not that great, I say without hesitation
Someone will love you more, just wait and see

My opinion of you changes like the skyline
A star among the cascading dark
Baby, don't let yourself flame out
Before the rest of your fire starts

I've seen heartbreak,
I've made mistakes.
I've seen bloodshed,
I've had girls **** with my head!

I've had glazed eyes,
I've watched the skies.
I've been beat down,
I've been stuck in this here town,
forever.

For what feels like forever.

And you know what I say to all this,
it's been a good life, good life.
Slapped me on the face, a gentle kiss,
and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

I've been held high,
but never glorified.
I've been treated,
like a piece of meat, yeah!

I've been shot down,
I've been around.
I've kissed feet,
and I'll never repeat this!

And you know what I say to all this,
it's been a good life, good life.
Slapped me on the face, a gentle kiss,
and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

It's been a good life, good life.

When I came into this big world,
I knew nothing of pain and sorrow.
I grew up, blinded by my blanket,
never watched the news,
because I just couldn't follow it.

Days turned months, months turned to years,
as the days continued to rocket by.
Till one day, I felt a pain inside,
the day my grandfather died.

I remember my mother calling me,
waking me from a deep slumber.
She said, "Boys, quick, come in here,
you're grandfather has died",
as she stumbled back into the in-law apartment.

I ripped off my blanket,
and in what felt like an instant,
I was by his bedside.
My aunts and my mother cried,
but I just stood there.

I felt nothing.

So I left the room,
crawled up the stairs into our house,
and sat on the couch,
alone.

I sat there for a few minutes,
thinking,
"this isn't real",
and I think for a brief moment,
I believed myself.

That was until I saw the hearse.

It slowly backed into my driveway,
eerily rolling ever so slowly,
then it came a complete stop.

A man stepped out and walked to the back or the vehicle,
he opened the two swinging back doors,
which flew open with ease.
He then pulled out what looked like a stretcher,
it was draped with a white sheet.
A few of my uncles pulled up next to the hearse,
jumped out of their trucks,
and rushed inside.

The man followed them.

And soon enough,
they all came back out.
Following them was the man with the stretcher.

Resting in it,
covered in another white sheet,
was my grandfather.

My family gathered around the back of the hearse.
Most of my aunts were crying,
with my uncles comforting them.

That was when it hit me.

I felt my chest caving in,
my lungs deflating,
my heart imploding on itself.

A lone tear fell from my eye as I watched the man ease my grandfather into the back of his hearse,
and drive away.

The man I loved,
was gone.

The man who told me ***** jokes,
was gone.

The man who made me a man,
was gone.

The only man who understood me,
was gone.

I made my way to my bedroom,
where I began to weep uncontrollably.

Never in my life had I felt such pain.

And never again,
will I feel a pain as powerful,
as I did the day,
my grandfather died.

Walking through sand,
blustering winds.
Whipping my face,
I trek through tinariwen.

Seeking peace, a new life,
Tassili n'Ajjer stands in my way.
There is not much time,
sun sets on this day.

I climb,
I walk,
I sit,
I kneel,
I feel,
the sand beneath my bare feet.

My tagelmust, takatkat and akarbey,
are all I really own.
That and the camel that follows.

I feel a colder air whipping with the sand,
so I set up for the night.
I pray with all my might.

May Set calm the storms,
and Isis deliver me home,
to my new home,
my new home.

Snow squashed beneath my feet,
colored with dirt and gasoline,
as I shuffled down the road.

I had many more miles to go,
and it looked like the snow,
wasn't letting up anytime soon.

With my pack on my back,
and my stick holding a sack,
I trudged forward, fearlessly.

To find a home,
was my only goal,
but that seemed out of reach.

So I wandered into the woods,
and pulled up my hood,
as I looked for a place to set up camp.

And the nights were cold,
my toes, they froze,
as I bundled up in my blanket.

How long would I survive?
Would I make it out alive?
Question ran rampant though my head.

Till one morning, I woke,
there seemed to be a white smoke,
that blanketed the ground.

In front of me,
something pearly,
what looked like massive gates.

At the gate, a man stood waiting,
and after much contemplation,
I approached him.

He said, "come closer my son,
you're here for all you've done,
you traveled everywhere, doing good.

And now you have earned,
what most people will yearn for,
a spot in my kingdom."

"But sir," I retorted too him,
"I never believed in you."
The man looked at me and smiled.

"I forgive everyone,
you see son,
and you deserve this."

It was then,
we began to ascend,
into his kingdom.

When I was a child,
I never ventured past the garden walls.
Blanketed by vines and moss,
they stood oh so very tall.

I didn't dare to imagine,
what was beyond them.
Mother said there were monsters,
and other scary men.

So I played behind,
the garden walls.
And so I was confined,
by the garden walls.

It wasn't till one day,
I was playing in the mud outside.
I kicked my ball over the wall,
and onto the other side.

I stood there for a while,
thinking to myself.
All I had was that ball,
and nothing else.

I was behind,
the garden walls.
But I wasn't confined,
by the garden walls.

So I disobeyed my mother,
and climbed to the other side,
and I was greeted by, to my surprise...

The painting on the wall,
reflect the simple songs,
we loved,
we shared.

The absence of the sound,
collected and compounded,
into one,
tightly wound bomb.

Did I expect for it to explode all to soon?
I can't explain how much it pains me to lose,
the one thing I loved.

I spend cold long nights up by the window,
watching and waiting for you to come home,
I won't sleep tonight,
or the next night,
or the next or the next or the next or the next,
or the next night.

But I'm fine,
I'm fine.

Don't waste your time,
looking back.