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 May 2017 Barbara
Tessellate
i acted cool.
You know, like how they do it on TV.

27 floors up,
your door was unlocked.

i didn't take my shoes off,
that way you could see the bad *** i really am,
deep down.

You know, you told me you loved me.
That's why I came.
i believed you.

Oh, how naive of you, i think back now.

I sat on your beat-down chair,
while you sprawled out on the floor-level couch.

I was terrified,
but the kids on TV are never scared.

He said he loved you.
No one else has ever felt that way before.
He loves you, kid.
You can do it.

Come cuddle on the couch?
Meh, maybe if i feel like it later.

Play. It. Cool.

i slide unto the foot of your ***-stained sofa.
i can feel your feet shaking behind my back,
your toes teasing my sides,
poking in and out between my ribs.

i know what you want,
and i want it too.

Keep. It. Cool. Kid. Keep it Cool.

i feel my hands slip out of your tight grasp,
my fingers inching their way up your leg,
following the dips of your pelvic bone.

What is happening?

The taste of you is so foreign to me.
i've never known the sweetness of another human being.

Let's go to your room?

Kid, it's just like on TV.

Okay, yeah, i guess if you really want to.

i didn't want to take my clothes off.

The world was spinning,
i was seeing and feeling things i didn't know to exist.

What is happening?

i love you.
i love you, i love you.

it's all over,
i leave.
27 floors of shame.

not only don't you love me,

you don't talk to me.
 May 2017 Barbara
Navarana
I just cannot.

I cannot hold it in my body anymore.
I need to scream it out like a mad
man calling out for his salvation.

I am not immortal nor mortal.

The small voices in my fictional
world tells me what to feel and
what to do.

Someday I will love you and you
will love me.
Ehl
I am here. I am everywhere.

Every place you’ve been, I have waited.

Every face you’ve seen I have worn.

I have one name but thousands.

On your birth I am your twin.

At your death I shall be your shadow.

In a mother’s womb I have slept.

In a hero’s cry I have risen.

In the smile of a bride I took pride.

In a widow’s tears I am crushed.

I am the pledge of a groom.

I am the passion left by the dead.

I am the spark in every kiss,

The eternal flame of every vow .

Fourteenth of February I was born.

I am the spell in cupid’s arrow.

In the eyes of Aphrodite I am found.

Red as cherry I have been drawn.

I have no age. No gender.

I linger in your heart or perhaps in your mind.

‘Til eternity I shall live.

I am your hidden desire for others.

I am their hidden desire for you.

I am not LUST.

LUST is a friend and sometimes a foe.

TRUST is my companion. LIE destroys me.

BETRAYAL is my enemy.

TEMPTATION will lead you to another path.

Do not follow. You won’t see me there.

Don’t either find me. I WILL FIND YOU.

TIME is my deliverer. Be patient.

I have one name but thousands.

But you, you may call me

LOVE

And I’m pleased to love you.
Adapted from Katy Towell's "Agony"
 May 2017 Barbara
Marinela Marie
You
 May 2017 Barbara
Marinela Marie
You
There’s a world that’s ours
And a world that is not
How I wish to live only
In what my heart has begot
But wherever you are, or where you exist
I see clearly now, is where I have missed
I cannot see, nor feel your pain
But I can stand by you this point and again
There is no one that I wish to know
But the man that you are, the you I love so
All I can do is to stand strong beside you
In silence, with love, wherever it leads to
No words I have, it may never come
But know this, my love, you will not come undone
Your strength is your glory, and forever you shine
Integrity, before you, forbearance in mind
My eyes glazed with true adoration abundance
Long for your embrace even only for once
And so I remain, standing still, just beside
Not asking for more, though your love may subside
But forever, I say, I know with my heart
I stand with you no matter, how far we will part.

— The End —