The more I read poetry
It seems like obituary.
Death in a coal mine
of the innocent canary.
Let us say what needs
to be said finally.

Homesick

  When did my childhood
  disappear? When did I
  really notice girls and
  dress for their glances?

  When did we tie us in knots
  and end with child, married
  and I was crying, homesick
  not quite ready for this?

  At the drive in movie you
  dried my tears. We carried
  on to our cliched future. We
  split not knowing the why.

  Years have let it all play out.
  Many different players yet so
  alike. The parts don't change.
  I'm homesick for everything.

You and I aren't that different.
  I'm insecure and missed love's touch
  fighting ghost's dying while I dream.
  Am I breaking my own heart as such?
  I'll be your dancing monkey if you want.
  I promise you I will break every mirror
  too honest with your reflection as it is
  hovering near your worst nightmare fear.

adrift in the sea that is humanity
    where we meet by chance in water's
    fickle movements. I want to hold you
    only for a clock tick to love you
    for a lifetime. we'll float apart in
    stormy seas and be with other debris
    clutching and touching and trusting
    in another lifetime in a second.
we believe in god and miracles
but we can't find our way home.

In the Mojave in a sandstorm
monsters are back in town
slow burn alcohol stove
keeps its water boiling
ready to blow this place
to hell any minute now.
I've been drinking
with kind strangers.
You're my mute ghost.
Please, answer me.
Who must we **** on
your cruel altar?

Now I love low light and shadows.
     Night is my flattering friend who
     understands the ugliness of aging.
     My skin turns purple as my veins
     capture hold on my thinning skin.
     Onion skin. Thin translucent, like
     strong wind could rip it off bones.
     I was a fetching beauty not too long
     ago. Full sun on the beach I had
     men staring agog. I strutted and
     knew they didn't have a chance. I
     decided who would plant their flag.

Everyone fears their God.
Some say I don't believe.
Thunder breaks their resolve.
We will all soon leave
quaint fallacy behind
we see more clearly now, but
we've never been more blind.
It's driving me mad.

We knew all along
we weren't happy but
neither had the will to
start over for another
bout another fight
sick of endless rounds
with no KO's just punch
drunk slurs and morning
shame and mute rituals.
Amazing how good we became,
amnesia and kiss off to work.
Who knows where the time goes?
Will either of us have a shred
of life left when the other finally
dies to lie naked with a stranger
just to sleep with your memory?

I needed honesty at last and
walk out of the bathroom naked
jaws drop eyes shock me  in a cocoon
of truth condemned now I'm free.
I broke sacred vows and my kids
and turned into a statue of salt.