your glasses on the
nightstand
but never out of focus
you’ve slipped past
my peripheral
and enlivened my world
so subtly
my chapstick shares
your cells
your pockets are filled
with my wettest
secrets  
you flourish
like july
in the deepest layers
of my
skin

you have come
in
reverberations of
peace
and self discovery
i’ve tripped over many
versions
of shangri-la (paradise)
to find myself
in cancer season
making you ***
on a tuesday

i’ve trembled beneath
you like
spring
our first moments
etched into my cells
like hair
was a love this great
meant to be doomed?
was i supposed to love you
like frida loved diego?
i long for our electricity
did we leave the window
open
to blow our love
around the room
or the security away?

i’ve been licking
my wounds
for months
you want me
to be
excited
that you want
to see me with
potential during
the verdant months
breathe me in
eat my spirit (*****)
with potential
i am (unfortunately)
in love with you
and you’re out of
your ******* mind

between stories of fate
and government conspiracies
you exist amongst them
all
like 2 shots
instead of one
you have filled me
like the thought of abundance
in a famine
i long for you in
multitudes
you exist deep
in my cells

you’ve been lying
dormant for
the past 2 years
a moth-like hiatus
in a love-like state
you worship
the tenets of
delayed gratification
in bite sized pieces

propagate wide open
my tiny heart
mourns for you
you're making a mole hill
out of a mountain

i’m sorry
i emailed you
in the midst of your mid-20’s
existentialism
i promise to only reach out
when i’m pre-contemplating
or feeling insecure
you taught me about energy
and how it never dies
i will always miss the
idealized parts of you
i’m roused and paralytic
by your
chaos and good intentions
your skin
and how you breathed that night
i rode you on the chair
is etched in my memory
like a scar