its been a while, you know
since i've last seen you
for you were the reason my pen would touch my heart
writing poetry on these walls we once made love in
for you have escaped my mind to a foreign land
i miss you, please return home
for i am begging you, you made me cry, you let me create art
i didnt long for inspiration because you were imprinted in my mind
now you're gone

but here i am once again
writing poetry on these walls i now sit alone
no longer needing our moans, breath, tears to write the words
its just my memories of what we once we had
what we no longer have

i wish i could slit my throat
so all of the dead flowers are free
for you killed them
every last one
they were once live and vibrant
like i was
until they were picked by the wrong hands
they no longer know how to grow anymore

i remember the night you ****** my soul out of my body
how kissed me so hard, you stole my breath
when you inserted yourself into me
holding me down, making me scream
i didnt want it
you did
you stole everything i worked for
now im a mess
left to stare at a skeleton that was once covered in flesh
how could you steal me from myself?

you stole the oxygen from my lungs
you were so breathtaking, i quite literally couldn't breath
you watched as my face went blue, me reaching out, struggling for breath
and yet you just stared as if you were satisfied
that i was suffocating right in front of your eyes

you never let me breath again

you use to read me like a book
making up different stories about me that were true
for you told me i reminded you of your favorite character
they were someone who had dreamed of being with
and i was them, the perfect specimen in your eyes
i was the story you had been craving to change, to edit
you wanted to me to be your happy ending
but i wasn't
for i was me and not them
and you didnt like that
so you decided to close the book
ending the story suddenly

skin me alive, i beg of you to do so
take off my skin layer by layer, laying it in acid
so it devolves, leaving nothing behind
i want you to them remove my limbs
piece by piece
throw them into the water so they float away, to find a better home
i want you to break every bone that makes up my skeleton
why you ask?
so you can no longer break my heart
i want you take my organs and eat them
so you can taste the pain you caused me
and lastly, take my blood
put in a jar and freeze it so it lasts forever
that way you always know what you did to me
you made my blood spill all over the floor
when you said good bye
for i no longer wanted to be a human
i no longer wanted to exist
so i beg of you
to take me a part

"look at the pretty colors!" you whispered as you pointed to the sky
i watched them as they went by
the feeling of myself floating on the clouds with you was too real
i remembered you reaching for my hand
telling me it was the smoothest one you've ever felt
how you never wanted to let go

i held onto your soul and kissed it
making sure you knew i worshipped you
for the drugs were making me forget
but i wanted to remember this moment forever
you told me it was the shrooms
that made you say those things
yet i didnt want to believe you

for the trip caused you to fall in love with me
i was only good enough to provide the love when you needed it
i thought the love was me
my presence
my smooth hands
the clouds
but i soon found out
it was just the drugs
it was just the shrooms

i remember pulling my skeleton from my body in order to savor a part of me
one that was still pure
that hadn't been soiled by your touch
my skeleton could no longer stand to live inside my body
it was itching to leave its home
for i dont blame it

i wish i could leave my home as well
for a intruder had decided to break into it
and steal what was once my most valuable possession
my consent
my boundaries are now all yours

i never met someone with such horrifying intentions
for someone whom i let into my home before and they treated well
but once i found a house mate
they wanted to make sure i never forgot
that they stole from me

the lilac colors pour from your sadden heart
for you are longing to create art
something you can transfer your sadness onto
so you no longer have to carry it

you use your tongue to speak the words that your feelings write for you
for your pain is scripted by the ones who hurt you
you dont have to memorize any lines
they've always been imprinted inside of your mind

the art you created hangs off your chest for everyone to see
you display it proudly, wanting people to know that you did this
but yet you dont think proudly of yourself, you never do
you created this art from the things that hurt you most
something you always wanted to do
but...

why cant you manage a smile?

you tore my garden a part
once you decided that my flower was your home
i never once said you were allowed to enter my garden
but you did
you killed the flowers over and over again
crushing them all with the weight of you on top of me
i was laying there, staring up at the sky
wishing for you to leave my garden

for i am no longer human
my organs have been hollowed out, my entire body is empty
for i have vomited up every single drop of blood
my skeleton now lives in the closet along with all of my secrets

for i have made sure that i am nothing more than skin
laying there, waiting to be worn
for i dont want to be human anymore
i want to be someone's shell

i want someone to hold onto my skin
to love it
to cherish it
like no one has ever done to me

i dont want to be human no more
so i know what it feels like to be loved

lets make love
lets ****
lets have ***

i want you to speak words of poetry to me
as i moan in pleasure from watching your mouth move with every letter you speak
it turns me on, makes my heart skip a beat when you speak with passion

my ******* get soaked whenever you touch my heart with your words
it brings me nothing but pure pleasure, close to ******
i want to *** to your poetry

with the more passion you speak, the harder you **** me
causing me to scream out that i want more and more
i dont ever want you to stop, it feels too good

lets make love
lets ****
lets have ***

but only when you speak poetry to me

im digging a grave into myself and resting in it
im hollowing out myself in order to feel alive
i let my insides spill out through my mouth
i will do anything to not feel numb
i struggle to feel alive
i am a walking zombie
bags under my eyes, an expressionless look on my face
for i am dead

you remind me of the first flower blooming on a lovely, spring day
its petals sprouting out all around the bud of the flower
creating something wonderful

you remind me of morning dew
the little droplets of moisture resting upon the grass
when your bare feet touch it, it tickles and you cant help but laugh

you remind me of the stars
because when i look at you, there are a billions of reasons why i love you

you remind me of poetry
when i kiss you, the words i want to write about you are placed on my tongue
so when i speak them, they fall out of my mouth with ease

you remind me of all of the things in life that i love
and that terrifies me

you crashed into me like waves
pulling me under, drowning me
as your lips met mine, i lost my breath
your taste filling my lungs like water

you touched me as if i was the smoothest seashell on the beach
your tongue felt like sand as it traced my thighs
i became a hurricane with you
nothing could stop my love for you

then you found a pearl
you tossed me back onto the sand
my storm slowly went away
as i watched you touch her just like you use to with me

her throat felt like dry once she heard him say goodbye
it felt like she was swallowing glass pieces
all of those memories they made together, shattered completely
she kept them all in a little glass jar, it was sitting on her top shelf
there for her to look at and smile to remind herself of how much he loved her
then he said that he no longer wanted her to be his
the glass jar began to move froward, edging closer to the edge of the shelf

as she begged him to stay, he kept saying no
the jar moving even closer to the edge
then he said goodbye, leaving her in a shattered mess
just like the glass jar that has now hit the floor
the pieces scattered all over the place
her throat felt dry as she watched him walk out the door
just like she had swallowed those glass pieces