I love when you look at me
But it's always with disgust,
'Cause I don't look like anybody
Nor am I the prettiest.

I'm not like you, as you can see
I don't have long, curly hair
I am not very 'girly'
I don't care about what I wear.

Nail polish, jewelry, hair straightner ?
All that don't ring a bell,
You think makeup can make you prettier,
And I don't understand that well.

But even if I'm not like you,
Even if I love loose shirts and jeans
Even if I don't care about skirts, bags, shoes,
It doesn't make me less of a Queen.

And yes, I like looking at girls,
Because I think they're all beautiful
Just take a look at this world
They're all falling for a smile, a look, a dimple.

Hey darling, no need to worry,
There's no reason to feel so annoyed
There are plenty of girls like me,
Girls who want to be like a boy.

The rain woke me up in the middle of the night,
I looked at you sleeping peacefully
Tried to take the sheet, but you held it too tight,
I thought the world was opening up to me.

So I got out of the bed, walked out of the room,
Willing to see the world but not feeling so well
On my hands, there still was your perfume
I left a note on the table, as a farewell.

Finally outside, take a deep breath,
I keep telling myself "It's okay, it's alright"
Now I need to leave, go far away from Death
I have to walk under the moonlight.

Deep inside my mind are running ideas
Of what the world really is like,
Only a spark could take it down in ashes
Only happiness will make you stop the strike.

But first you have to find happiness,
And where to in this cruel world ?
You have to search and search again, unless
You've already found the rarest of pearls.

Leaves are cracking beneath my feet,
And I can feel the thin, cold breeze
The wind whispers with every heartbeat
With only myself, I'm feeling at ease.

Walking barefoot like Gandhi
Alone under the deep dark sky
With only stars for company,
I suddenly feel the need to cry.

This is such a beautiful night,
And yet nobody takes time to see the world like I do
People live blindfolded all their lives,
They cannot see the beauty, and neither can you.

You think about your problems and look for a solution,
Is this really the meaning of your life ?
Everybody constantly is in motion,
It's like they need to worry to survive.

Hit the pause button, even rewind if you need
You're avoiding something real somehow
Don't think, just watch, worry is a ****
This is a wonderful world, you just can't see it right now.

She's walking barefoot on the beach
Leaving behind her footsteps in the sand
Her skin's the colour of a peach
A red flower in her hand.

The sun is goldening her hair,
Her eyes remind me of the sea
Her sweet perfume floats in the air
Eveybody's staring.

Her floral dress softly beats on her leg
The jealous wind tried to undress her,
Singing "Love me oh, love me I beg"
The sun hides behind a whisper.

Okay, it's true that when I first saw her,
Sparks flew in the air,
And that she was prettier,
When her fingers ran through her hair,

It's true that she has the most amazing smile,
Which kinda drives me crazy
And I could walk a thousand miles,
Just to make her happy.

It's true that she's beautiful,
And her eyes probably enlighten the dark,
But don't take me for a fool.
She's not playing with my heart.

But don't get me wrong,
This is not a love song.

Okay, it's true that look is really intense,
And her lips do look tasty,
She makes me lose my senses,
But I'm better off without anybody.

It's true, her smile is devastating,
And I feel good when I'm with her,
Her voice does sound amazing
When she sings, it makes my life better.

But don't get me wrong,
This is not a love song.

I love the way she walks around the parc
And the feeling of my skin against hers,
And it's true, the beating of my heart
Keep getting faster.

But no, I'm not in love,
I don't dream of her all the time,
She is not the only thing I can think of,
She's not always on my mind.

No, believe me when I say,
That you shouldn't get me wrong,
I have a billion ways
To prove that, this is not a love song.
This is not a love song.
This is.. a love song.

Oh sweetie, I swear I tried,
Tried to write a song that wasn't about you
A song that wasn't about too much pride,
But it just wouldn't do.

Believe me, I tried to write a song
That wasn't about a lack of trust,
A song that wasn't about us,
But I guess I just can't move on.

I tried to write a song that wasn't about betrayal,
A song that wasn't about love,
But maybe the reason why I'm in denial,
Is because you're all I can think of.

Baby, I tried writing a song that wasn't about your eyes,
Or that wasn't about the way you looked at me,
A song that wasn't about lies,
But that's all I can do, that's all I can be.

I tried writing a song that wasn't about earthquakes,
That wasn't about heartbreaks,
But you know, these are the only things
You see nowadays on TV.

I tried so hard that it didn't work,
I tried so hard, it made my heart burst.

I took out my key, opened the door
Watched the living room just for a second
Ran upstairs, left my suitcase on the floor
But this is all my fault, I reckon.

I'm sorry for the mean things I have said
And the bad things I have done,
I'm sorry I can't keep you out of my head,
I'm sorry if I miss you a billion.

I slowly stepped into my room,
With my eyes closed with fear
When I suddenly smelt your perfume,
I opened them and made everything appear.

I'm sorry for always being in a bad mood,
I'm sorry I can't be happy all the time
I'm sorry for the times I am so cruel
I'm sorry for thinking you're all mine.

I didn't look at my small bed
With a sad look on my face,
I just looked at the window instead,
I looked at all this empty space.

I'm sorry I can't live without you,
I'm sorry if this is too late
I'm so sorry but there is nothing I can do,
I just have to accept my fate.

I thought I could be strong enough
To understand, to start a new life here
To stop crying, to face the truth,
But I broke down in tears.

I'm sorry for always thinking too much,
I'm sorry for being such a baby
I'm sorry I really like your touch
I'm sorry for the times I act crazy.

I asked myself what I was going to do,
How on Earth I was going to survive
You're my everything and I'm nothing without you,
This is one of the things you don't realise.

I'm sorry for being a waste of your time,
Because you deserve much better than me
I'm sorry I can't get you out of my mind,
But you're just so amazing, and I'm just so me.

I sadly sat down on my bed,
My mind full of moments we had together
I suddenly remembered things I have said,
And they made my happy memories bitter.

I'm sorry for when I hurt your feelings,
Because I know I have but I didn't mean to
I'm sorry for saying stupid things,
That's just me and there's nothing I can do.

I looked up at the ceiling,
And watched the bulb slowly dying
I compared it to my life : close to the end
I can't stay so far away from my best friend.

I'm sorry for not being there when you need
Someone to talk to, or just hold you tight
I'm sorry for the times I was being stupid,
I'm sorry for keeping you awake at night.

I then stood up and just stayed there,
Imagining I was holding you in my arms,
I just watched the empty air
Tears in my eyes, shining like stars.

I'm sorry for spending the nights crying
When I should have been happy to be with you
I'm sorry I can be so annoying
I'm sorry I can feel something so true.

I slowly sat down at my desk,
Took a paper and a pen out of my drawer
Why did I do that ? It was grotesque
I started writing a poem about us together.

I'm sorry I'm too emotional,
I'm simply sorry for being me
But most of all,
I'm sorry for being sorry.

Inside of me, monsters are chained,
I tried many times to let them go
But I believe that they are trained
To bring memories back from a long time ago.

And if they constantly remind me of my past,
I can't get rid of them
They are moving way too fast,
As if they didn't want me to write this poem.

What can I do now, I'm asking you ?
Try to give them what they want, maybe
But they don't want my soul, just the truth
And I can't admit what I've done, I'm sorry..

It's like I'm made of different things
I can feel the monsters in my heart,
Holding it to stop its beating,
They're gonna tear my dreams apart.

I'm the prisoner of your hopes now,
You have put all your faith in me
I know I have to win somehow
That fight against the monsters willing to get free.

But the soldier inside my mind
Is fighting against the monsters
Be careful, you poor and little man,
They're so close to my heart, don't make me suffer.

This is how I found a reason to fight,
I swallowed back my pride, and I wrote
The truth on a piece of paper, late at night,
This poem is the daughter of hungry ghosts.

Every now and then,
I can feel you
Everything's the same,
I can't get through.
You're slowly damaging
Every part of me
I am slowly dying,
Poisoned and unhappy.
Once the day will come when
You will understand
That you're giving me pain
So much that I can't stand.

Just let me go,
I can't deal with that.
I don't need to know.
Stop all that chitchat.

Every day and night,
You hunt my thoughts.
I wish I could fight,
But my heart isn't tough.
Are you going to
Leave me alone ?
There's a mark of you
Deep inside my bones.
You're poison,
Running inside of me.
I need, just for a second,
For you to let me be.

Homage to that gorgeous girl you saw today,
Who smiled at you and asked for a cigarette,
That girl that you will never see again,
And still, you haven't stopped thinking about her yet.

Fireworks in my head,
Your smile in my heart,
Weird feelings in my stomach,
Whispers in the dark,
Laughter in my dreams,
Hopes in the future,
Flies in my memories,
Posters in the nature,
Poems in my book,
Sleeping bags in the garden,
Us together in my mind,
Spiders in Heaven,
Tears in my eyes,
Soap in my hair,
Holding hands in my bed,
Love in the air,
Your laugh in my ears,
Walks in the rain,
Cries in my nightmares,
Regrets in my pain,
Torture in my chest,
Clouds in the sky,
Sharks in the water,
Bright hopes in your eye,
Love shared in a kiss,
Only seconds in our last hug,
Elephants in a banana tree,

                                          n               ­                                                  h          v
I                     t            i                                                   ­                           a
                               h              k                                       I                                     e


                n                                            ­           r
g   o                                                       c                                y    .
                    e    ­                                                     a     z

Every time I look at you,
It's just beauty that I see.
No matter what you do,
You always look pretty.

I love that beauty of yours,
It just comes naturally.
Every time I look around,
You're all I can see.

I just love you the way you are
That being, amazingly beautiful.
I know how lucky I am,
Don't take me for a fool.

I watched you entering the room
Out the window of the second floor.
I walked down the stairs soon,
And met you to surprise you more.

Only lit candles on the table, no lights
And a red rose, to symbolise passion.
I wanted to have a romantic night,
To apologise for my actions.

Looking surprised, you made no sound,
But I guessed you were happy.
A nice melody in the background,
A smile on your face ; just you and me.

I walked in from behind you,
Made no noise and took you in my arms.
I said "Good evening", you said "I love you",
We kissed, no harm.

We ate face to face, alone and together
Staring right at each other's eyes
Me who wanted to make everything better,
Brighter colours were now in the skies.

I'd rented a movie, we watched it on my bed
Not until the end because, well, we're in love.
We cuddled, we kissed, no words need to be said,
I bet jealous angels watched us from above.

They say romantic nights are the best,
I can not say it's not true
But for my personal interest,
It's the little things that make me love you.

Between the lights
There is a place
Brighting up at night
The corners of your face.

It's dark and almost empty
Except for horrible thoughts
It's just unnecessary
And your heart isn't tough.

Neither of us like it,
Every problem opens another door
But we have to deal with it
It's not something we can ignore.

We can't always be strong
But two is better than one,
We can sometimes be wrong,
Life isn't about perfection.

Between the lights
There is a place
Where we can fight
Then fall into your embrace.

But when the doors are closed
And nothing can escape,
We can finally be close
I can see the smile on your face.

We have talked to each other
About that place we don't want to visit
But if we must, to be together,
Then be it.

Although there is nothing better
Than that moment
When we forgive each other
And forget the arguement.

Then I can spend the night with you,
Hold you tight against me,
Be as still as a statue
When you kiss my body.

They say love can't be perfect.
But what do they know about perfection ?

Woke up early that Sunday morning
Just to find you sleeping next to me,
And in my heart, a new feeling,
That I thought could never be.

A quick visit in my brain
Reminds me of what we did last night,
I tried telling you, in vain,
That I just melt at your sight.
Your smell is printed on my skin,
A type of drug truly unique,
I still have the feeling
Of your lips on my cheek.
Memories flashing in my head
Bring me back to yesterday night,
Both of us lying on that bed,
Not even lit by a single light.
An atomic bomb in my heart
When you slowly carressed my face,
Before spending the whole night
Cuddled up in your embrace.
I wish every morning
Could be just like today,
You would be the first thing I'd see,
'I love you' would be the first thing I'd say.

Quietly I lay closer to you,
Our hair tangled, your hand in mine,
You open your eyes, and I can't argue,
Your smile is like a ray of sunshine.

Why do I have to make such a fuss about everything ?
It's like I can't even control myself anymore
Why do I get mad at every tiny thing ?
This is not what I wished for.
I don't want to fight
For something I don't believe in,
Makes me cry at night,
And tears cannot be unseen.
I hate feeling so powerless,
What exactly am I supposed to do ?
Your kisses are like a carress,
But it hurts so much to be with you.

This is not what I expected love to be like.

I guess everyone has to wake up someday,
But I had dreams and hopes about this.
And sometimes, you throw our arguments away,
But they cannot be solved with a kiss !
So now, here I am, what do I do ?
Is there really a sense to our story ?
I know this feeling, I know I love you,
But you can't just keep hurting me.

I just wish you could understand.

Or is this all my fault ?

Life
feels empty
without
you.