Before we met each other
We would stand on the bank
Skipping rocks on top of the water
Watching them sink to the bottom.
We would wade out ankle deep
Where it was shallow
And dream about meeting a true lover
From time to time we would venture
Far enough out to get soaked
But never over our heads
We would sit and throw sticks
While we pondered love and the meaning of it
We would get mad and try to drown ourselves under
Then the day we met and dared each other
To jump in the deepest part of the water
I'm pretty sure you dove first
But you called to me from the bottom
And I couldn't help but follow
I couldn't let you hold your breath forever
So fast we swam back to the surface together
Took a deep breath of each other
As we reached the top I was your's to keep
Letting go of words cause talk is cheap
The waters so gentle and calm
Until the storms began
So many we have weathered through
But we always managed to save each other
Then one day you swam ahead of me a little further
I tried catching up but the rip tide
Caught me and pulled me farther away from you
When I finally caught back up I was so exhausted
And you were tired of waiting
Always looking back
Calling hurry up and swim faster
Now we're both stuck here
And it's still as we are just floating
But hold your breath because we're going under
And I can see the shore
I thought that's what we were heading for
Now I'm not so sure....

It used to be so easy for me to give my heart away
But I found out the hard way
There's a price for that, you always have to pay
And love was no friend of mine
That was proven to me time after time

It used to be so easy to fall in love
But I found out the hard way
That road leads to nothing but pain
And love was just a cruel game
You play to win but always lose the same

Now there's an empty space in my heart
Where love used to be
And the days still come and go
But there is one thing I'll always know...
For all the love I gave, I still have nothing to show.

Here I am restlessly waiting, knowing I'll have to be leaving soon
I'm staring at your perfection and I never want that to end
Because, I don't want to ever have to start over
And I was always scared of the dark before
But now it's all I'm longing for
This isn't a silly moment
It's not the storm after the calm
This is the deep, fading breath of
The love we've been working on
You can't seem to hold me like I want you to
And I can't feel you in my arms
Nobody's going to come save us now
We've pulled too many false alarms.

I was the one you always dreamed of
You were the one I tried to draw
This isn't nothing to me
Baby, you were the only light I ever saw
You make the most of all the tragedy
And I act like a ***** because I can
I try to push you away
And you say things that hurt me
Until we're left feeling *****
And we don't understand.
So I'll just go cry about it
And drinking is what you'll do
But I'll still hold the keys
And you'll still have the best of my memories.

Coming home when every moment there is lost
in your work
All my love and warmth turned cold as dirt
Every stare is a waste if it's not on baby girl
As strangers walk right on through
And the best of our friendship breaks in two
Now I'm feeling further from you everyday
Your head's in the stars because you're worlds away
So I tell myself I'm moving on and letting this be
We once had a fire but now we need a spark to make us last
Just look at me baby, can't you see I'm still burning for you eternally
I should probably walk away but then I look at you
And I get the feeling I should just stay
Because loosing this love, losing you, would be losing everything
So I don't care if the one thing that's killing me is wrong
Because I can't stop these feelings
I'll just continue to hold on

We once were brave like soldiers
Holding each other like we were ever so broken
Now we just need to hold this love together and be open
And it's okay to be scared
Because we've both been shaken but this doesn't have
To be the end of the love we've been making
We're burning up and I don't want this love turning
To only smoke and ashes.

© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

I know that face
That chiseled,
Rugged,
August,
Attractive face.

I know those eyes
Those deep,
Alluring,
Chestnut-colored,
Playful,
Romantic eyes.

I know those lips
Those full,
Inviting,
Indulgent,
Kissable,
Sensual,
Warm lips.

I know that smile
That genuine,
Broad,
****,
Friendly,
Gorgeous,
Delightful,
Charming smile.

I know that voice
That intoxicating,
Soothing,
Gentle,
Silvering,
Admirable,
Enticing,
W­itty,
Smoky voice.

I know that skin
That olive colored,
Tough,
Smooth,
Hot,
Touchable skin.

I know that body
That masculine,
Appealing,
Divine,
Fine,
Magnificent,
Ravishing,
Hard body.

I know those hands
Those strong,
Pleasing,
Gentle,
Captivating
Protecting,
Hard working hands.

I know that mind
That imaginative,
Creative,
Fun,
Beautiful,
Intelligent,
Always thinking mind.

I know that heart
That heroic,
Passionate,
True,
Faithful,
Strong,
Undying heart,
That loves mine

© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

I don't know how we came to be
But without you now I'd be incomplete,
Even though you're a slave to your job
and addicted to magic cards,
I'll never lose my faith in you.
We know two becoming one is lethal
But if we don't wanna die alone
We gotta do something to try and fill the void
And you can't buy love
why would you even try?
Sometimes the truth won't make you happy
But I'm not going to lie
The one thing I know to be true is...
It ain't what you say it's what you do
And my heart beats only for you.
I know I'm far from perfection
I'm perfectly imperfect with all my scars of affliction,
But when you feel like giving up,
When no matter what you do it's never good enough,
And when the going gets rough
You will always have my love.
When you're crying out
And the ones you thought were friends
haven't stuck around,
When I get angry
And say what I don't mean,
When I keep my heart protected
not on my sleeve,
You still don't have to question if my heart
belongs to you,
Because it belongs only to you.
No matter where we go
Or even if we don't,
No matter how hard the adjustment bureau tries
I'm never leaving your side,
Because this kind of love don't die.

© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

I'm a ship that's been tossed
A bridge that's burned
But you brought me back from the point of no return
Now you're not here to catch me anymore, and
I'm gonna have to fall anyway
Because I have so much weight on me
And anything goes when everything's gone
So I say "bring it on"
Because right now I don't feel a thing
And if you would of just left me a single thread to hold onto
I'd have one good reason not to feel the way I do
But can't nothing save me now
I was the fool and
I'm paying for it now because you're no longer around...
And I know you feel like I don't care at all
Because still life goes on,
And it's always not enough or it's way to much
So, how are you when I'm gone?
Because I'm struggling now to make it on my own
And I just want to fall asleep or die
Because this is killing me inside
And it won't stop until my final breath is gone
So spare me those three last words
"I love you"
Because, I'll wait for you but know that I can't wait forever
Now you've made your stand
And I know you have your reasons
Like I have mine
I just hope pride is good company at night
And that we both can find some light in this dark
I still want to be the one you want
But I can't stay here for long,
And I hope you don't learn to love me once I'm gone....
© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

Say something poetic
Say something not so cliche
Tell me I'm pretty
Tell me how much I mean
Say that you will always stay
Tell me you'll never leave
Tell me I'm special
Tell me you believe
Tell me how I'm an exception to all your rules
Tell me to you I mean the world
Make me promises
Say I'm so smart
Tell me I'm awesome
Then tear our love apart
Say your giving us up
Tell me we're not okay
Say something to justify all the hurtful things said
Tell me I'm your dream girl
That I belong with you
Say something factual
Say something cruel
Tell me I don't have to leave
Explain it to me so I can understand
Point out my faults with my heart in your hand
Render me speechless with all your good points
Use your intelligence to make me feel not smart
Tell me how you're a better human being
Convince me of all the ways that I'm wrong
Educate me on where you think I belong
But don't say you loved me when I meant nothing at all
And don't call me baby doll
Don't tell me I look pretty in the snow
Don't pretend that you tried to mend my busted soul
Tell me how you had good intent
Say what you need to say in order to vent
Accuse me of things you think you know
Tell me I lied
But don't say I never tried
Tell me you've always been there for me
Use reverse psychology and turn it all around on me
Tell me that you're a hero
Tell me I'm the fool
Tell me how you'll stay til time is no more
Speak your words into my broken heart
And I won't say anything at all...

© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

No time for me
No time for you
I'm sorry again
The wrong words were said
Waiting alone
Wondering where you've gone
Tired mind
Won't shut off no matter how you try
Missing you
Missing us
Things you say
You never get done
Wasting time
You can never get back
Feeling lonely
Even when you're here with me
Lots to do
So much to figure out
Time is money
And mine's running out
Why do I miss you
What's with the distance
I'm right here
But where are you
Craving your affection
Longing for our familiar connection
Burning passion
Smoldering down to only ashes
You know I get mad
And you're who I blame for that
But why waste the red bull
Or the love in this room
Baby, we got some making up to do
So come on over
And I'll let you have it
You can take it out on me
Don't hold back
Lets take our time
Forgiving these hearts we use
Candle light
Locked door
"I'm leaving" left on the floor
We're both angry inside
Let me love that out of you tonight...
See this smile
I'm trying so hard to hide
Who we trying to fool
I know your game
And you know all my rules
Baby girl's feeling ****
And you're playing it so cool
Just stop it
And let me have it
Until I give into you
Take your time,
Lay me down,
Hold me close and
Love this aching out of me tonight.
© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

You stood before me
My eternity within your hands
You spoke my heart into motion
My soul now to stand

You see my failure
Witnessed all my shame
My bitterness weighed upon your shoulders
My faith now to stand

So what can I say?
And what can I do?
But offer this heart
Completely to You

I'll walk upon your salvation
Your Hope alive within
I will believe in us
Like you believe in me

I'll fall to my knees, my heart abandoned
In awe of you who gives your all
I'll stand by your side, my heart to you surrendered
For all I am is Yours

© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

I knew you were coming for the show,
And now here you are.
So, are you ready to see some magic?
First off you should know what you're playing for
Do this only if you're brave,
Because, mark my words this love will make you levitate
And you will have no choice but to gravitate.
Now the dice are in your hands,
Think you can roll a Yahtzee?
Be sure before you let go,
Cause once you're mine there's no going back to before me.
My love is so strong you would think it was on steroids so,
If you get a chance to fall take a firm hold,
But if you break my heart you will fear the reaper,
Because I'll turn cold as a freezer.
Like a fairy tale ending with a knight in shining armor
I'll be your sleeping beauty
But you'll be the one in a coma.
This love is like a drug you can try to hit it
and quit it but I'm so dope
you will mess around and get addicted.
So, are you gonna be my brave volunteer...
Do you believe in illusions...
or think this is just all smoke and mirrors...?
Cause I got a hat full of tricks
and that ain't a rabbit up my sleeve.
Chris Angel ain't got **** on me!
Because, my love is so enchanted it's like
"Abracadabra"
And your heart will disappear...!
© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

How do I say goodbye to someone as loved as you
Where do I begin to convince myself it's all going to be alright without you
It seems darker now without your presence in this old world
It's like I've lost my guiding light to see because
You were always so content to let me shine
while walking a step behind
You gave so much praise and glory
When you were the one with all the strength
Never one to complain
You were my hero and everything I'd like to be
Like the song you were the wind beneath my wings
Your kindness never went unnoticed
I've kept it all here in my heart where it will remain
And I want you to know that I wouldn't be the person I am today
if it hadn't been for your loving ways
You are the reason I know what true love feels like
Because I know you loved me truly and unconditionally
Always my supporter lifting me up so high
You were my defender who fought for and believed in me like no one else
ever has
Because of you I got to witness genuine kindness in it's purest form
You were never far from my thoughts
And now you're always there when I close my eyes
You tucked me in so many times with bedtime stories
always making me feel right at home
So now I'm tucking you in and I know you are at home where you are
Nothing I could ever say or do would be enough to honor the person you were
The most gentle soul I've ever known
The best person in this whole wide world
Everyone says you were blessed to live a long life and I know you were content
But I'm the blessed one because I got to make memories with you
I got to laugh with you and cry with you
Sitting at the kitchen table we talked about any and everything
You never made me feel that I was silly or wrong
You just let me be myself completely
We got to see each others true colors shine through
And I always admired how beautiful your's were
In this old world without any color
You were a wildflower
© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

My body aches to be in your arms
My face longs to feel your hands touch
My mouth anxiously awaits your lips
My ears contently listen for your soft whispers
My eyes get lost in your's
My hands can't wait to touch your body
My hair lies in wait of your fingers to run through it
My hips stand restlessly anticipating your strong grip
My neck moans for your kiss
My tongue longs to embrace your's
My legs become weak
My feet ready to run
My soul cries out for yours
My head is confused by your ways
And yet my heart is very hesitant...
© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

I have all these fears
that create doubt within me
I'm so sad it hurts and still
You ask me to trust.
You want me to give unconditionally
But for what?
I'm already down on my knees as
I beg and plead for someone to rescue me
Someone come save me from these demons
that are consuming me!
It's dark here where i am
and I don't know if I'll ever find a light again
I'm gasping to breathe
All this pain inside is destroying me
I just want so bad to be free
I'm tired of this life dragging me down
tired of listening to everyone around me shout
I want numbness to take a firm hold of me
I want to feel nothing, cold as can be
Because I will never trust anyone again completely
mostly because I don't even trust me
I don't know when I'm going to finally snap
Right now I'm just stuck in life's heavy trap
I've been rode hard and put up wet
and I am out of gambling chips to bet
I want to give up
and be done with it all
Let go and not fear the fall
Why do I keep pushing myself and the ones that I love?
Why can't I let well enough be and just rise above?
So much madness and hate in this world
what has it made me become?
I feel worthless as can be
when no one is ever there to help me
It's like reaching out for someone who is not there
and I'm always left alone and bare
Always playing this game of truth or dare
It's like a first time kiss,
The price you pay is so immense
So tell me why I keep on playing,
When the price is too high for me to keep on paying?
This dark cloud just keeps hanging above
and I'm standing here stuck in a rut
continually hearing "I love you, but...."
© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

I don't know what true love is and perhaps I never will,
All because I let you take from me everything I had to give.
I trusted you just to get ****** in the ***!
I gave you my all
Heart, body, and soul,
And in doing that it has left me with this empty, relentless hole.
I no longer feel.
I have no tears left to cry.
I don't even have the innate ability any longer to try.
I've been defeated time after time.
Having my heart stolen with no one but me paying
for that crime.
I've begged and pleaded on my knees,
And still you asked more of me!
I've lost me in all this for sure so tell me
Now does anyone have the cure?!
I give and give,
So you take and take,
Which has left me feeling like I must be the fake...
I've done the time for the wrongs that I tried to make right,
And in doing so I'm left with nothing but awful spite.
My life with you was spent caged and tied,
Beaten and stripped of all my dignity and pride.
I had to live a lie just to be able to coincide with you in my life.
I've spent so many nights awake and aching,
Carrying my baggage of the goods you left damaged.
Defeated with nothing but my white flag waving,
And everyone of my hopes suddenly fading.
I have been dominated and violated to the fullest extent!
How could you be so bent?!
I hurt so bad inside and out as I lay in bed with my thoughts screaming out.
Intimidated and threatened until now I'm paranoid.
Seems like everyone's out to get me,
And for what I just don't know...
Because I have nothing to offer anyone, anymore.
Been taken for granted by everyone I know,
Yet I still possess this kindness of sorts.
What you did hasn't left me malicious or mean,
I just no longer believe in my own dreams.
Nightmares on the other hand I understand completely.
I know they are real because they can take a hold of me.
They wretchedly embrace me as they pull me down.
This is nothing but sheer agony all the time!
My scars I keep concealed like my heart with a shield,
As this pain in my soul can never be healed.
My eyes will never tell,
And the nothingness in my touch you will not be felt,
Because I'm the star actress in your stupid little show!
Just tell me what you want and I can be that for you.
But every time I look at myself in the mirror I will see no lies,
Just shame at what I've let happen to this once sweet heart of mine.
I could of made a good wife and mother someday,
But now that will remain nothing but a vague memory.
You spent all that was given,
And even though there's nothing left of me somehow I'm still living,
Dealing with all this affliction in my self reflection.
You are a thorn that has buried yourself so deep inside of me
that from it I will never escape and be free....
© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

You think no one sees this
Well I think it's time you knew the truth
All the diamonds have left your bones,
You're all flesh and no feelings so why don't you just
Throw it to the wolves!

You spit words like you're someone else.
I once was stuck in the promise you made but now,
I'm tapping out.
You chewed me up and spit me out and
the same mistakes are waiting on you to be made now.
You get what you feel, and what you wish to be,
And you paint yourself in a picture so perfectly,
As you deny the kind of person you really are.
You can't live sarcastic sincerity,
So keep sharpening your guilt temporarily,
And realize that,
I gave you everything and you threw it all away!
.
Love like a cancer, still you begged me to stay.
So kneel to pray,
Live life on your knees as you embrace your own disease.
Stop to breathe as you start to choke, and let your life begin.
It will just keep you on your knees begging for more!

You probably thought I wouldn't get this far
You thought I would never escape
You don't know how hard I've fought to survive
Waking up alone when I was left to die.
All these roads I've walked,
All these tears I've bled,
I am the dirt you once walked on and
I maybe a sinner,
But I'm not your *****!

So let me tell you something baby,
I know you love me for everything you hate me for
I'm the one you need and fear the most.
All the judgments you placed on me
Was a reflection of your own self discovery.
So maybe next time before you start casting stones,
You should crawl out of the shadows of the dark unknown,
And take a look in the mirror and try to see the truth in your own face.

I hate the way you dominated and violated me
I hate the way you looked when you would lie to me!
I don't know how we got here,
But now there's no way out!
I will never thank you for all this rage that within you dwelt.
You tore me apart and now you're feeding on my rotten heart!
You were the perfect disease
For the beast living within me!
You were the misery I used to crave!
A faithful enemy holding a sharp stave.

Nothing good has come of knowing you,
So now...
You're going to shut up and know that this life is mine to live alone!
I no longer live to uphold you!
Maybe once I was blind but,
Through your rage I could never be saved,
All you did was embrace my decay,
So shut your mouth and listen to the words I say!
I am nothing of yours
You no longer own me,
And I can't hear you anymore!
© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

You speak of love as if you've never known a true lover,
But you were my best friend
How could I have known any better?

I know you got a lot of pain that was born inside you,
But instead of growing stronger
You let it divide you

How could you be so careless with my heart?
Piece by piece my world was torn apart,
And now my hope has nothing to revolve itself around

Didn't you know I was always yours to touch and to keep...?
I loved you from the moment of our first kiss
So the rest should of been history

You were always trying to save me
Never knowing you were the only thing that could
in the end really hurt me

Now you see me whenever you close your eyes
And maybe one day you'll understand why,
Love comes slow but goes so fast

When you're staring at the ceiling in the dark
With the same old empty feelings in your heart,
Maybe you will understand why everything you touch seems to die

Dreams will come slow but go so fast
And you will realize that true love is the only thing that lasts,
You will see me in your sleep, never again to hold or to keep

Because you let your hope in me go....

© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

More beautiful than a beauty queen
Prettier than an ocean scene
As iridescent as a flower blooming in the spring
As vibrant as the sun
and smarter than some
Beautiful like the heart inside your chest
I don't even compare to all the rest
Aphrodites ain't got **** on me
Like a blushing bride on her wedding day
More beautiful than a 68 Nova Super sport
Like a model of some sort
Gorgeous as a diamond engagement ring
or a caged bird that will still sing
Pretty as poetry
Cooler than flowetry
I must be the bomb diggity yo
Like a tattoo under your skin
I'll always be there for everyone to observe and admire
As beautiful as leaves changing colors in the fall
So beautiful that I must be without a single flaw
They say things are beautiful if you love them
that must be why I don't see my own beauty at all...
© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved