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arubybluebird Jun 2014
I think I was born to be alone
Nobody to call me theirs
Nobody to call my own
My name is Solitude
Lovely to meet you
Now I must go
arubybluebird May 2014
go to the cinema by yourself
let yourself succumb to the glories of solitude
drive out to Los Angeles with your best friend
go from bar to bar until you find the one that feels right
the one with your preference of tunes
get ******* ****-faced
have a one night stand with a handsome stranger
but instead of giving him into your body
give him into your soul and mind
have the conversation you’ve anxiously desired
fall in love for a few hours
every second starts with a first
may tomorrow be responsible for sobriety
arubybluebird May 2014
do people write each other letters anymore,
and if so, do they send them?
when was the last time you visited a post office?
when was the last time you licked a stamp?
when was the last time an envelope with your name hastily
hand-scribbled in cursive make your anxious heart
beat uncontrollably?
has it ever?
have you ever?
do people dedicate songs to each other anymore?
do they wait twenty-nine minutes on call
to declare a love in their heart for you on the radio?
do people listen to the radio anymore?
do they call at 6 25 AM
to leave a 3 minute and 53 second voicemail
with Jacques Brel desperately crooning "ne me quitte pas" ?
do people still like other people?
do people still like themselves?
do people know that they are people?
are people even people anymore?
I deem not your response
but my own rearranging complacency of mind
I am aware that I am still human
and although I am not fond of myself all the time
which only makes me that much more human
I am utterly and entirely fond of you
every peeking minute of the day, every fleeting hour of the night
you fill my mind with worded imagery
so I write you a letter
with no other intention than for you to know
your essence is in all of my favourite songs
all of my favourite songs lead me to you
oh, love
love is so human
my love is so human for you, my love
and I'll try anything to hold on to
these sensations a while longer
these physical notions
carry my emotional train of thought
these physical notions
are temporary gestures of my everlasting love
arubybluebird May 2014
it makes me sad that there are so many people everywhere
and none of them are you.
arubybluebird May 2014
3 05 AM
uninspired
vacant
regret
are you
what your future self
had always hoped to be?
is there any beauty left for you to see
at the sight of me?
nothing has ever been as easy
as wanting you.
I've never known how to get along with my thoughts.
how have I become so wasted?
where has all the passion gone?
and why I can't I come up with
a better word than passion?
words can no longer explain
this subtle torment
******* this lifeless room
******* this settling comfort
******* my senseless tongue
jaded youth
fickle heart
holding back
from who know's what
not me.
not me, again.
contemporary ****-up
sitting still on the amber picket bench
in the center portrait of your ruffled mind
the sound of our heavy breathing
creeps past my skin
every whispering sigh a memory left for me to dwell on
you said you wanted me, an enigma
I was a mystery
it was a mystery
it was the mystery you wanted
not me
not me
it was the need
to be wanted
to be needed
to be mended
my limbs, paper figurines
your eyes, story-telling gypsies
desire
slowly unfolds
like lotus flowers
both so naive
desperately
trying to be free
from sentiment

I know you felt it
I know you feel it, too
When the night comes sooner
and your inbox is empty
arubybluebird Apr 2014
Our generation in retrospect: LOL (but it's not funny.)
arubybluebird Apr 2014
I have no emotions. I am an emotion.
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