I tried to keep it alive
I stood in front of it
Took your blows instead
I didn't let you touch my love
I kept it safe behind me

But when you took out the gun
I knew it was my love or me
And for once I choose right

You killed my love with a bullet
The bullet of a no
And you can't take back a bullet baby
No matter how much life we both try to breath back into it
My love is dead

I could feel it was different
There was something on the tip of his tongue when I kissed it
Every time he pulled away it wasn't to stop like before
it was to begin something I could tell
but he was hesitant
So he tried to say what couldn't with everything else
it was like his hands were trying to push it into me
or caress it out
it was like his kisses stopped half way through
and his eyes would pick up with the question, do you understand?
Love is tangible and I could feel it coming
I could feel what I'd been waiting for all these years
But all I felt when he finally pulled back, took my face in his hands
and nestled into my ear the most perfect, "I love you"
was the years of its absence
All I felt were the times my loving hands were pushed back and told no, I'm tired
All I felt were the kisses I gave even though I could feel his eyes still on the TV behind me
Love is tangible and so is its absence

Then
You were the snow that I tried to shovel
You were the leaves that I tried to rake
You were the rain that I tried to collect
You were the grass that I tried to cut

But I got so tired of working so hard

Now
You are the snow that I play in
You are the leaves that I run through
You are the rain that I dance in
You are the grass that I lay in

You were not the one that needed to change

Our habits help to define us
For some we choose to quit
(I used to overuse the word like)
Others we just forget about
(I used to bite my finger nails)
And the best we just enjoy
(I still crack my joints)

We also define our habits
Label this one bad
(I used to pick my scabs)
Consider this one good
(I still floss my teeth)
Ignore the many mundane ones
(I always say please and thank you)

Life told me you were a bad habit
So I tried to quit you
Then ignore you
Then forget you
But life was wrong
You're the best habit I've ever had
And you were meant to be enjoyed